A Social Myth

The idea that one is not a whole/complete person until one is half of a couple:

Nobody actually says this word-for-word (and few are conscious of it in society’s or their own lives), but most people, especially women, act out this principle in their lives and relationships. Some examples are when a person puts all of his/her efforts into finding a significant other (usually losing focus on other things in life), when people often ask whether one has found a significant other yet, when a person thinks/acts as if getting married is the most important accomplishment in life, and when a person constantly thinks/acts as if all of his/her problems are solved when he/she first finds a significant other (for example, some people say “I’ve finally found someone who makes me happy… and I think I can spend the rest of my life with him/her…and this is really the ‘real thing,’” etc. every time he/she enters into a relationship).

 While most of us do want to be in a relationship – we are social creatures – we are all also quite ourselves when we are single. It is not the significant other who defines a person – it is that person and his/her thoughts, actions, etc. Wake up and smell the coffee! You may be single, but you’re still living, the clock is still ticking (you can’t just say ‘time out’ until you find a mate, then ‘time in’ again), and you can and should enjoy life while waiting for that significant other to come around (just don’t make finding him/her your only goal). Being yourself is what will attract the right significant other for you, but most importantly will allow you to live your own life, even when/if you’re in a relationship with someone.