Accepting Rejection with Grace

Anyone can have happiness, but here are the tricks:

1. Know what you want, but don’t impose it on your date. Lay back and see if you guys have similar goals–if not, then maybe you found a potential good friend (as I have on a few occasions) just not a mate or partner.
2. Have fun! Don’t put pressure on the situation–relax and stop looking at a date as a do or die.
3. If you find that you don’t get a return phone call, don’t sweat it. The guy or girl you once thought was wonderful didn’t suddenly grow horns overnight. They are still wonderful–things just didn’t work out–period.
4. Plan for things yes, but don’t place all the emphasis on your plans. Dudes, if you are only going to take a chick to a nice restaurant at the hopes of getting laid, then you are going into it with an expectation–if it is dashed, whose fault is that? Ladies–a first date is not marriage–it is a date–the person has a right to see other people and explore their options–if it turns out to be you great–if not move on, dwelling robs you of the time to meet the one who is best for you!

There is too much anger in the rejection aspect of dating, but if we step back and evaluate why we are angry it shows that this reaction is a little silly.

I call this an adult temper tantrum. It is in its essence a bit foolhardy. The anger does not reward you, it only detracts. While the other person has moved on without a backward glance, there you are all bent out of shape and poisoning yourself with bitterness.

We cannot control outcomes, we can only handle our reactions, and once we learn how to do that with grace and dignity, our lives are much fuller.