Action Sammy’s Dating Tips: How to Make an Exit From The First – and Last – Date

The day finally arrives! You’re about to go on a hot date with someone you’ve been fantasizing about for the longest. You’re sitting in the café or the food court waiting for the hot date to show up. At last, he/she shows up! But something is terribly wrong! You’re dressed real nice, in one of your best skirts or slacks, shirt neatly pressed, hair well-groomed. Your date looks like he/she went through a trash can to find the clothes to wear. A dirty, wrinkled t-shirt and an old pair of jeans or shorts exposing half the buttocks. Hair unkempt. Dirty teeth. Dirty fingernails.

The rest of the date is a complete failure. You wanted to have a nice dinner at the Sizzler but he/she wanted to eat at Burger King. All he talked about was last Sunday’s NFL games. All she talked about was who’s pregnant and who’s getting married. He talked with his mouth full. She laughs loud enough wake up anyone sleeping within 10 miles.

So what do you do when it is time to say good night? How do you escape from this disaster? How do you tell him or her, very gently, that there won’t be another date? Sometimes, if you give off the right body signals and language the other person will know right away how you feel and may also be in a hurry to break the date. But, this isn’t always the case. So, what do you do?

Actually, there are several ways. You can just get up and walk away. Or, you can excuse yourself to the restroom, leaving him or her in the restaurant or movie theater (I did once, a long time ago. Hey, I was only 20! And she kept talking about her ex-boyfriend!). You can pretend to have just received an important call and that you have to leave immediately (I think I may have done this, too. I can’t fully remember!)  But, you don’t really want to be that mean now, do you?

Being nice and telling someone gently doesn’t always work either, unfortunately. Most people take politeness the wrong way, especially if done with a smile with all teeth showing. Perhaps, one should just be blunt and straight to the point.

Thank the person for his/her time. Don’t thank him/her for a nice date. It wasn’t. Very gently explain that you don’t feel that there is any chemistry and that there is obviously no compatibility, which your different fashion tastes may already attest to. Most people prefer to do this over the phone as it saves them from possible interrogation. If the person insists on another date, just politely refuse.

Under no circumstances should you tell the person that you’ll remain friends unless you sincerely want to. If you wish no further contact with him/her you should make it clear. Never call him/her up “to see how you’re doing” or any sort of thing.