Action Sammy’s Dating Tips: Top 10 Topics That Can Ruin The First Date

Ah, the first date! The first impression! This is the one that will truly matter. If the first doesn’t go well, there likely won’t be a second. So, this has to go well. You must present yourself as someone who is fun to be with and can engage in intelligent, polite conversation.

Conversation. Perhaps nothing determines how well the date goes more than your ability to hold an intelligent, polite conversation and this is where many of us screw up without even knowing it. Most other mishaps are fairly easy to spot on our own. We are usually able to stop ourselves from practicing bad table manners. We usually know right away whether we’re dressed or behaving inappropriately. We can often tell when we’ve made a major slip of the tongue and can quickly go back and apologize for it. But most of us usually don’t know what topics to avoid. We often feel that as long as we don’t bring up the obviously wrong topics, like porn, we’re on the right track. But, alas, there are other topics that can be as much of a total turn off for the person you’re trying to impress.

1. Politics: Very few topics lead to heated exchanges as quick as politics do because no two people share exactly the same political views. If so, then all political parties would have to do is toss a coin to see who gets the party nomination. Even during election year, politics is best avoided on the first date.
2. Religion: Telling your date what your religion is or giving your date some small, intricate details of your spiritual beliefs is okay but don’t get too far deep into the topic. If one of you is a Christian and the other Muslim leave it at that. If one believes in God and the other doesn’t change the subject immediately before your curiosity forces you to ask a question you’re bound to regret. If it’s important to that Mr./Mrs. Right shares your beliefs then you may want to rethink things later on after the date.
3. Issues and causes: Death penalty. Global warming. Greenpeace. Abortion rights. Animal rights. Affirmative action. Those concerns belong in Congress, not on your first date. Period!
4. Ex-partners: Okay, come on! Everybody should know this one! Unfortunately, many of us don’t. While bringing up the ex doesn’t necessarily lead to a heated discussion you will still succeed in downright irritating your date and causing him/her to wonder if you’re really ready move on. Any discussion, even passive mentioning, of the ex should be avoided.
5. Family drama: Your date is someone you’re trying to impress, not a family counselor to listen to your problems. You’re supposed to be trying to impress your date. Everyone has family issues from time to time so yours aren’t going to impress your date.
6. Finances: Who cares if you’re making $10/hr or $5,000/month? Let your date become interested in you for you, not for your money. At this point, it is no one’s business how much you pay on rent or mortgage, utilities, food, leisure and your monthly car payments.
7. Your looks: Don’t put your date on the spot by forcing him/her to offer an opinion on your looks. It can make you look like a person of low self-esteem, a total turn off for almost everybody. Leave it to your date to voluntarily compliment you but take it further by telling him/her of any desires for a nose-job or chin-lift, etc.
8. Your friends: At this point, your date is interested in you, not your friends. So, spare your date any details on who’s getting married, who’s pregnant and who just broke up. Let’s talk about you.
9. Sad experiences: You’re supposed to be having a great time. Don’t ruin by bringing up painful memories. Your date won’t be interested in the fights you got into at school or some of the beatings you got from your parents.
10. Gender-dominated topics: Guys, the lady most likely won’t be interested in discussing the highlights of Monday Night Football. She’ll likely be considerably less than thrill to hear about what you read in Maxim. Ladies, most of us guys know almost nothing about bridal showers and most of us no reason to change that. And if you want us to take you seriously, avoid bringing up a topic you read in Cosmopolitan or Vogue….unless, of course, you have the supreme desire to see your guy fall out of his chair and spend a significant portion of the remainder of the date laughing uncontrollably.