Dealing with The Opposite Sex: Five Simple Concepts

1. Respect. Respect is crucial for everything.  How is a guy going to be a leader, and support you, if you’re cutting him down or making him feel less of a man? You can ask pretty much anything of me and I’ll seriously consider it if you come about it respectfully. However, you could demand the littlest thing insultingly and I’ll say no or ignore you.

2. Give more than you take. This applies to me too in whatever relationship it is, even with friendships that you have, if you give more than you take, the relationship will grow, like a savings fund of a bank… If neither of us go into debt (for a prolonged period of time), we’ll both stay happy. (note: you might have the question: give what? the answer is whatever the other person values. For me, basically whatever makes my life easier or helps me reach my goals… ask me to find those out!)

3. Communication. If you communicate what’s bothering you or what you want, that’s a big step to getting it or having the problem solved. If the person you’re communicating with respects you, they’ll help in whatever way they can. Communication in general is the reason some relationships work and the lack of it is often why others fail miserably.

4. Confidence over doubt. Confidence helps life in general so much more than insecurity and doubt. If there’s anything that happens that a person is unsure of, a confident person will often expect something harmless or a simple explanation later, whereas an insecure person will expect the worst, and go into a brainstorm of terrible possibilities. Giving someone the benefit of the doubt is much better than always fearing the worst. (Not to mention a confident person is always more pleasant to be around.)

5. Expectations low –> Surprise and enjoyment high. Keep your expectations of me low, and you’ll constantly be surprised. I enjoy doing remaining unpredictable, it’s hard to do that when you’re expecting a shopping list of actions before I’m allowed to do something out of the ordinary that you’ll like.

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Afterthought: Obviously trust, commitment, sense of humor and having good chemistry/naturally getting along is important, but the other stuff is pretty key and I feel that if I’m spending time with you already, you’ve got those qualities already.

Afterthought 2: Somebody recently was confused by my actions and proclaimed that “there’s no guide! How do I know?” Well now there is a guide and I’d just like to say that it would be easier to understand both guys and girls if they made something as simple as a guide to what they want and what’s most important to them when they’re interacting with other people.  More Relationship advice at DarkGrin.com