Divorce is Not the Answer

A perplexed state of mind that traps us in is tomb.  It is tragic to say something is over.  It is tragic to just give up.  It is tragic that our society so openly accepts divorce as an acceptable solution to marital problems. It is an abortion of a family. Is it easier to quit and run from a bully?  Or is it better to stand ones ground and fight for the prize?

“The Bully”, the foible of life itself.  The struggles and pains that plague a person and plague a marriage.   It is easy to put the blame on another, to search out their faults that impede our own self growth. Or just give in, give up. To justify or rationalize that it is okay to surrender to the lie.

We deceive our self day in and day out, reinforcing the idea that the other is to blame for how we feel.  If we get away from that person everything will change for the better. We close our minds and lock our hearts.  Shutting off the life sustaining flow to the heart and the arteries become corroded.  Love is not felt because the passage has been blocked.  Our feelings perpetuate our actions.

Feelings are merely feelings.  They have no logic, they are not fact.  Feelings change like the flow of the tide.  It is plausible that one can admit their feelings.  Yet implausible that one can refute them.  It is a tangled web of deceit. It is easier to believe the lie. 

Divorce seems the accepted solution to marital problems. If we can just shed our self of this person that has us shackled, we can unlock our mind and heart and be who we want to be.  The lie is we think it is a solution. When it is merely the catalyst to a new set of tribulations. We move forward, possibly even thinking there is a “soul mate” of our dreams out there.  We picture that just over the horizon lies the fantasy we envisioned. 

Because we are free of the marriage, we have loosened the binds that held us so tightly trapped, and now we are free to fulfill our inner dreams.  More often than not the dreams become nightmares and the ghosts will haunt us as our life moves forward, even into new relationships.  New relationships will bring there own set of problems.  Problems are a natural fact of life.  What makes people think that if they couldn’t solve there problems in one relationship that they will be able to do it in another. And what new problems will crop up.