Eight Top Reasons Why You Marry the Wrong Person
Divorce rates around the world are rising and couples are forgetting the real reasons why they think they marry the wrong people.
You are more into Chemistry and not character –Many people are looking at their perfect match or perfect chemistry; the beauty, education, the status of living and some aspect that she/he thinks she/he deserve in a partner or someone perfect for their equivalent. One reason why people wants to have a partner with chemistry to them is about “what people will say” about the match. Instead of thinking about the character, they thought bad characters would change during marriage but it gets worst. Chemistry isn’t about everything, it’s too physical.
Marrying with an expectation to change after the marriage. As the saying goes, A man marries a woman expecting her not to change, but she did. A woman marries a man expecting him to change after the marriage but he wont and even becomes worst. People are people you cannot change who they are or expect them to change but instead one should embrace the personality and celebrate the individuality. But this doesn’t mean one doesn’t change his/her bad habits. If you’re concern about the marriage and the success and happiness, both should do all the things to change their selves in a natural way.
Marrying because the couple is sexually compatible. Remember that sex isn’t a foundation in a relationship. Sure it is fun and can promote intimacy but it never fixes troubles and conflicts inside the relationship. Do you ever wonder why after one night stand, the partners doesn’t call or text anymore? Because sex just spoil the special bond. Both should get to know and strengthen the bond through communication, care and understanding. Don’t worry about sexual compatibility. If the two are compatible intellectually and can connect with each other emotionally, sex just follows.
Getting married to escape problems in a single life, family crisis and other problems. Actually these problems will not be solved by marrying, it even gets worst. Before marrying, fix the excess baggage first because marriage isn’t a game that if one is tired of playing they can get away. It’s a lifetime bond
Marrying someone with different goal – Common goal also means unity. The marriage will succeed if both strive to a common goal but if the goals are different, conflict and disagreement arise. Making the marriage bland.
Lack of time and intimacy – marriage takes two-to-tango but if one is too occupied with money issues or business or other events intimacy is affected. The couple should devote a good time for the marriage to stay interesting and happy.
Rushing a marriage even if the man isn’t mature enough. There are men who doesn’t know how to make a woman happy, they just thought they could but they are still young and immature to understand. Men should be ready before marriages.
Co-dependency – This is the worst thing that could kill a marriage. When the two are co-dependent, they suffocate each other thus, making them feel abused and wanting to escape and tired of being in the marriage. Give room for each other even inside the marriage. The two should still respect the boundaries.
Marrying someone who have other parties – other parties doesn’t mean “other significant others” but can be considered as addictions. When there’s addiction it disturbs trust and intimacy. Make sure to change yourself first before involving in marriage.
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Post CommentEmma J Kerry
On January 23, 2009 at 2:11 am
I found this article really interesting and informative. Thank you for this.