Eros After The Storm: Make Peace Between The Sheets

Not have conflicts may be an important resource as long as one partner does not meet a strong desire for change, in this case the couple may have a similar and complementary serious crisis because it has no training in conflict and each partner has always know what to think and wants another.Complementarity if it becomes rigid often creates offense for the sake of each partner and may become the cause of resentment and silences. How can we recognize this diseased part in having a stiffness compared to tasks and roles? Let the examples: you have always been friends and invite you to organize the reception, while the partner is an excellent organizer of holidays. Suddenly he finds a shop which prepares meals and other special invitations and start substituting in the organization or, you find a travel agency which allows countries and islands to explore some very interesting and do everything to go to these new destinations.It might seem a beneficial exchange of roles and instead are created muzzles and heavy words. Each of the two partners think that the other is trying to take away the ground under my feet, which is challenging the authority and jurisdiction. And as if the change of the rules of the game as constituted immediately fall of the estimate, as proof that lacks confidence in the doing of the / o and you have to change the rules.Couples that last must have rules of substitution and change because the stages of the life cycle (cohabitation, marriage, birth and raising children, problems of families of origin, age) need people adjust to the changes necessary and to change the rules.Conflicts content, Explosive, but short-lived, with no bad injuries and without the construction of a narrative shutdown of all things that the other or not and it does not, the conflict dynamic that allows the discussion of opinions and decisions and that does not mean respect, although passionate, animated, does not destroy the relationship.And dangerous conflict rather offensiveWho despises or brings into play parts and meanings of the relationship. It appears that this type of conflict is resolved in the peace and reconstruction of a calm atmosphere, but always leaves traces that continue to send strong signals of discontent and anytime these signals feed the detachment and distancing.In these cases you should not trust of apparent peace, you must open comparison, apologize and say seriously because we have been overwhelmed by anger or to show that it is a mode of our original family crying out loud and say words heavy and not really think in this case is Needless to say we are happy because of the relationship and what we really like the other person.This clarification must be sincere and not just opportunistic diplomatic or otherwise does not help the reconstruction of a climate of confidence and resumption of Understanding emotional and often sexual. In fact during discussions that bring a crisis of mutual trust and self-esteem, it is difficult for the partners and in particular women are available to the resumption of sexuality. Only some couples use sex as a useful way for reconciliation.Symmetrical pairs are generally more competitive and with the search for a mutual challenge, are more willing to fight it vigorously. They think that the comparison is part of the vitality of the couple and no one receives permission to sit on our laurels waiting for the other or do something. In these couples tend to live closer to each role and task as employment, increase the dynamics, but sometimes this is very tiring, because the challenge is at odds with the desire to rest and continuity that is often the reason for the depth of relationship building torque stable.Addressing: This pair becomes less effective precisely in times of stress because in these moments is useful to the security that must have creativity. The couple can build in these stages of small rules that can teach each of the two areas of intervention to limit and to mediate the differences, accept rules of stabilization and allocations of tasks.Even sexuality could be important not to rely on immediate feelings because negative tends to disappear at times, but to create a sexual encounter around the sacred precinct, made up of research, care and rest to recharge your batteries for times less demanding and tiring.