Fight to Save Marriage

Fighting with someone is something no one likes to get into in general.But we keep falling into a situation where we engage in not-always-polite exchange of hostilities every now and then.Often these sessions of row,spat(whatever) lead to a split in a relationship and most of them end up regretting it when its too late to conciliate.

Experts say fights can be healthy and even energising if taken lightly and positively in a relationship.Fights are inevitable in most of relationships no matter how understanding the partners are, as all are different individuals there will be some level of misunderstanding sometimes which will leads to friction among them.When some couple say they don’t fight it means there is something seriously wrong between them, they are not involved with each other, leading parallel lives which is not healthy for them.

Fights are ignited for various simple reasons like breakdown of love, trust, respect, lack of communication, tolerance and willingness to understand.The stress due to the lifestyle today causes a lot of problems between partners.A stressed person venting out the stress he got from work, faces the same retaliation from the partner, since nowadays both man and woman are working people, which leads to unpleasant fight.

Sometimes fight is similar to that of a volcanic eruption taking place all of a sudden.After decades of peaceful and happy married life some couple split all of a sudden one fine day when they are least expected to do so.Its rooted to unfulfilled expectations.For some reason one of them or both are unable to fulfill their desires, carrying on in marriage for decades suppressing their need to fulfill their desires and suddenly one day realising it and just walk out of the marriage.The lid blows off like a volcano erupts and everything is ruined.One of them fails to understand, fails to give much needed attention to the partner’s need or expectations which are very important.This in-sensitiveness towards the partner feeling the expectations are unrealistic and not important at all, leads to a fight and eventually a separation.

We tend to expect our partner to understand the signals we send out instead of explaining openly about what we would like our partner to do, and when the partner doesn’t act the way we signalled, we feel hurt and react in unpleasant way which confuses the partner who is completely oblivious of the signals and reacts in same manner and both of them end up in a fight.The root cause being lack of communication here, instead of sending signals one should talk openly about one’s expectations from their partners.

Fights are synonymous to pain.It indicates of some issues in the marriage just like pain indicates some problem in a body.Ignorance is not the solution, it needs to be resolved with proper analysis, instead of blaming each other the couple should recognise the root cause with honest discussion about the issue.Fights are integral part of marriages, it makes life blissful if we take it positively and grow as a person taking lessons from it and try not to repeat the same mistakes which were responsible for the same.

We wont know the pleasure without pain.