Five Classic Myths About True Love

by Kay Brix in Relationships, November 15, 2009

What, on earth, is true love?

Do I actually need to hear the words from him?

Why am I so hysterical about what he says but not about what he does?

There are just too many cliches and common opinions about what love is, when it is “true” love or not, what is tolerable and what isn’t . When I was a teenager, I used to read these articles and actually judge and compare my own life by standards set by some unknown people.

How can an abstract person, a total stranger, decide what is “generally appropriate” and what is “absolutely intolerable” for your relationship?

Read and get rid of some classic myths about the “do” and the “don’ts” of a relationship. You may disagree with some, but at least you’ll be the one to make your own judgment.

Myth #1 – He’s cheating? Dump him!

Oh, yeah? And what if you’re a Muslim woman living in a small village with kids, no job and lots of stomach fat?

Let me tell you a story of THE DEVOTED WIFE

Lama has been living with Jawad for over ten years and he has been cheating on her all this time. Though “cheating” would probably not be the word Jawad would use. He calls it “the nature”, simply explaining that his physiology doesn’t allow him to be satisfied with a single woman. They have two kids and a small house. Anyone who sees the two of them dine, walk or sit next to each other watching TV, would never suspect there is a “fly in the ointment”. A loving couple made of a devoted wife and a cheating husband. He has one permanent mistress and a few on-going women. This picture of ‘true love’ looks very perverted to most modern, secular women. Why doesn’t Lama get some self-respect and throw him out?

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He is the father of her children. He is a good father, kids adore him.
She is Muslim. It’s normal and traditional when a man has more than one woman.
He supports the family financially, bringing all the money home.
He doesn’t drink, he doesn’t beat or mistreat his wife.
He has sex with her, lots of sex, anytime, anywhere. That sounds pretty good, doesn’t it?
He is a physically strong, healthy, attractive male.
She knows she will not find another man in this small village, who will be ready to take care of her and the kids.