It seemed to me you know the answer to your situation, but you’re not ready to take that step just yet..You’ll know when it is time..

Stu–relationship needs constant work! When we’re together that long with one person, we seem to forget the good qualities that person has. Find ways to reconnect and remember why you love the person before..

Ps I am 26 and we don’t live together yet!!!

I just don’t know what the he’ll to do!!!

That is just one of many things. Trust is very shaky. He uses the things I did in my marriage against me. Because he brings home the majority of the money, he wants to manage the bills, and god forbid if I try to talk about the finances. I’ve been abused. I dont recieve any appreciation for the hard work I put in around our home. His explanation is why should he mention about anything I have done because its all things I would have to do even if he was here or not. That just plain hurts me. I know he wants personal attention, but that statement right there, hurts me. I dont deserve that.

But, then theres my other hurdle. When he has walked out that door, I beg him to stay. Give him every reason why he should. Why am I so weak? Im really not thinking of any particular reason why Im getting so upset and asking him to say. All Im feeling is hurt. Then the thought that he will stay makes the hurt stop. Will somebody please tell me how I can remind myself of all the terrible things that go on between us so I can just LET HIM GO!!

Bottom line is my feelings cant be like this every single day and be wrong!!!! Somethings got to give! Everyone says to give him the boot. The hardest part? Im worried…..worried as ever. If I kick him out, Im stuck. My job isnt enough money to survive. Ive tapped out every government agency imaginable. Their bio father is behind on his child support, (yea court ordered) since January after being laid off. He is finally working again, but Im not sure when that money will start coming. Its enough for me to make it if my boyfriend was to leave, but thats if and when I start getting the money.

I just want to be happy. I want my kids to be happy. Im tired of them seeing Mommy sad all the time. My four year old says mommmy I wish Josh would leave. I asked why, and he said, because hes mean! My heart broke. The man has never been mean to those children, but im realizing that when they see him being mean to mommy, thats him being mean to them!!!!!

Well, I hope for better day for myself and all of you other women out there!

You have rights to happiness and support your children. A lawyer can help preserve custody of your children.

I still remember the good times. But, I also know the hurt all too well. My husband and I only have 1 child, but the thought of my son feeling hurt or confused if my hubby & I separate is enough to extinguish the thought.

A good friend said, “I hope you stay together, but if you do split, the younger your child is when it happens the better because they ask much harder questions the older and more aware they are.” There is truth. I don’t know if we will split, but I know I can’t imagine living in a marriage like this any longer.

Also, if you have family close that can help you, that’s great. With 4 kids, it will be VERY difficult, but you can do whatever you put your mind to. Also, a happier mom, means happier kids. You’ll also show them that the relationship was unacceptable, rather than teaching them to be tolerant. They learn from you what’s acceptable behavior. My husband isn’t abusive verbally or physically, but he hasn’t kissed me or touched me in over a year, other than the “peck” at the door to have a good day. It is rather like emotional abuse that no one sees and only I feel. My son even says kiss mama, or kiss papa to us, as if he needs to see us affectionate. I do not want to teach him that such a plutonic marriage is normal, AND i DEFINITELY do not want him to learn his father’s traits of emotional passive aggressiveness.

Best of luck to you.

Nice article!

You are the only one that knows what you should do!