Hey Honey, I Need More Sex!
by Sexless marriages? Do they work?
Why are more young married couples turning in favour of sexless marriages?
Maybe they have been single and living alone for longer than past generations, having numerous new fresh, exciting relationships before they settled down with a life partner.
Is it because the sex becomes boring and predictable with the same partner, that it just seems unimportant?
Many of these couples are childless, professionals with active social lives. If one of the couple just doesn’t want sex, should they do it anyway for their partner? Or should they turn a blind eye if their partner decides they want to have sex with someone else?
In a resent survey 40 million people are in sexless marriages. Sex less than 10 times a year is said to be sexless!
Can sexless marriages still be solid and happy or does one person constantly think something is wrong with them?
Wrong with their partner?
Is his or her partner seeing someone else?
Just using porn as a substitute?
Everyone has a different sex drive, they can be different throughout the day, month even from hour to hour.
If the marriage is sexless because desire has fizzled out, it can be rekindled.
Do people in a sexless marriage still get hot under the collar for other celebrities or people they know? Or is it just not happening at all, no turn on, no desire.
Although there is a myth about women going off sex more than men this is not necessarily true. There is normally a low desire partner and a high desire partner and more women will report the low desire problem more than men.
Out of all my female friends it’s the women that complain about the lack of sex and not the men and they are willing to start sexual relationships with other people but have they come clean and said there is a problem?
“Hey honey I need more sex!” is all they have to say, I think they would be amazed with the reply because their partner is probably also feeling sad too.
Hormonal problems and medication can all cause problems within your sex life, so if you think your sexual desire is low talk to your doctor.
Some couples develop hate for themselves, not liking what they see in the mirror and keeping all clothes on and all lights off but there is nothing sexier than naked skin and feeling skin on skin is the biggest turn on.
If you don’t want to live in a sexless marriage don’t bury your head in the sand, sort it out. It’s healthy for couples in their 70’s and 80’s to still enjoy gentle, loving sex sessions. Waiting for it to clear up on its own is not an option because it won’t, one of you will end up resentful.
If one partner is withholding sex as a power tool it could be a way for them to punish you for deep-seated, long-standing grievances. You need to show support and love and help find out what the problem is/was.
If your partner has an addiction to pornography, which is a more common problem than you may think, it’s time for you to sit and talk out the whys and wherefores.
If you truly love your partner you can work this out. On the days when you just don’t feel like sex, don’t have sex but give it to them. With a gentle massage and the use of your hands and some warm oils. Ladies would find this very rewarding and you never know it may end up turning you on so much with the thought that you haven’t got to have sex yourself, that you actually end up having sex.
Liked it
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
Post CommentAnupam Kachroo
On February 2, 2010 at 12:40 pm
Sex is just a part of the game , not the game itself ..
drelayaraja
On February 2, 2010 at 12:46 pm
Well analysed friend… Sex is the spice and life is the food.
Noodleman
On February 2, 2010 at 12:58 pm
Hey nice one =)
jimbob1
On February 2, 2010 at 12:59 pm
Miss L…This is a great write on a subject that probably effects more people and couples than are willing to admit. Sexual disfunction is not something that is going to clear up on its own…therapy and other forms of intervention may be needed to get the train back on the track. Thanks. I Like It and voted to say so. You do have a way to keep readers interested and clamouring for more!!!
Aiyanna
On February 2, 2010 at 1:00 pm
A well analysed piece of information…
I do agree with what you have said out here and dwindling sex drives in a marriage should rings warning bells as it does spell out something somewhere isn’t right…
Thank you for sharing this…
diamondpoet
On February 2, 2010 at 1:02 pm
When woman go through the changes of life sometimes the urge to have sex is not as strong, I think just because a woman no longer desires to have sex it doesn’t mean that the man should suffer and I would hate to know that my husband was being served else where and I would do what I needed to do to keep him happy, marriage is a two-way-street.
sambhafusia
On February 2, 2010 at 1:09 pm
it is a part of life..nice share..
ashan1614
On February 2, 2010 at 2:06 pm
Diamondpoet has a good point, but there is another large sector of women who enjoy sex more after menopause because there is no fear of pregnancy. Whatever the situation, couples definitely need to talk it out and find a happy solution for both parties.
XXElleXX
On February 2, 2010 at 2:45 pm
Hehehehahaha…I don’t think men romanticise sex as much as women do Lilyrose…the best sex occurs in a loving relationship…a very relevant and helpful write for those of us lacking vertical tango in our relationships
Atanacio
On February 2, 2010 at 2:51 pm
This is a super write on this subject
Guy Hogan
On February 2, 2010 at 3:34 pm
I thought I knew a lot about sex and I probably do; but the more I find out the more I realize the less I know.
STEVE666
On February 2, 2010 at 4:48 pm
Sex less than 10 times a year is said to be sexless? I only have it ONCE a year and right now couldn’t be more happier. You wanna know why? Cuz it’s tonight!! YEEEEEEAH!!!!
8Shei8
On February 2, 2010 at 5:24 pm
For Steve666, have fun tonight
I cannot have a sexless relationship. It is part of love!
Paul Roberts
On February 2, 2010 at 5:53 pm
A good write as usual. One point and I may add, on a man side, there are many factors that come in to play were a normal relationship can start lacking sex, and no, romance isnt dead, but stress over working on both partners can cause sexless nights. My solution was to find a ‘date’ night. We both planned it and handled as a date. So far we have had more then 10 dates. So try anything, it is better then nothing and both could get something! Friend, fan, smile
petercurtis97
On February 2, 2010 at 6:34 pm
I agree with reckless realist in the fist part.
There is common ground in sexless marriage
as we are grown to realize we are not honey mooners.
It is a good write- well done
Papa Sparks
On February 2, 2010 at 6:47 pm
Very well-written as always my friend.
VTech
On February 2, 2010 at 10:13 pm
Nice Thanks For Sharing .
http://webupon.com/search-engines/seven-ways-to-get-extra-huge-traffic
LoveDoctorLoveGoodBye
On February 3, 2010 at 12:31 am
Lol @ jimbob. Sexless marriage. wow! I didn’t know there were actually couples in this type of arrangement. It doesn’t surrpise me that it is the women who complain for lack of sex. But these days where everything revolves around sex, I have to say that I find this sort of odd. Great post. I liked it.
Frances Lawrence
On February 3, 2010 at 3:08 am
This is an important subject,and it can be a problem if one partner puts pressure on the otherb ut there is far more to a marriage than just sex.
ganeshgolha
On February 3, 2010 at 4:29 am
Great one! Its interesting.. keep it up. N thanks for the post,also go tru the one which I recently posted.. Thanks!!!
albert1jemi
On February 3, 2010 at 7:47 am
wow thats great share
wonder
On February 3, 2010 at 11:26 am
This is relevant and valid; a natural biological process.
giftarist
On February 3, 2010 at 11:38 am
Interesting topic. Thought provoking at some point.
Peter Cimino
On February 3, 2010 at 1:53 pm
Awesome article! Very well written and a great read, on a very controversial topic. Well done.
pearl2010
On February 3, 2010 at 4:12 pm
Sex is good especially you really attracted to one another.Like husband and wife!
Patrick Regoniel
On February 3, 2010 at 5:00 pm
There must be a hidden biological or emotional reason behind this.
AlmaG
On February 3, 2010 at 9:26 pm
In married life it is a necessity.
Stan Wilson
On February 4, 2010 at 7:07 am
The bible says do not be depriving each other of it, its talking about it in the marital arrangement.outside of that arrangement its forbidden……God and the bible does not change, we have gone a long way away,ohh boy….
SharifaMcFarlane
On February 4, 2010 at 7:08 am
I think that maybe, if people are really busy and stressed this can end up happening sometimes but the couple should find ways to still have the intimacy in their marriage.
devsir
On February 4, 2010 at 9:44 am
Wonderful Suggestion
qasimdharamsy
On February 4, 2010 at 10:44 am
Very Nice…I like it….
Bo Russo
On February 4, 2010 at 7:19 pm
I believe sex is important in any relationship, sometimes feelings lessen some over time.
deep blue
On February 4, 2010 at 7:41 pm
Well as Sigmund Freud put it , “it’s the primary motivational energy of human life”. The thing is marrying someone without the “test drive” would be the greatest mistake. If your love isn’t firm enough, why marry? Somebody has to stand firm and prove his love. Ask Dick. Another expertly expressed post, Lisa.
T. S. Lewis
On February 5, 2010 at 10:20 am
A well written article. I’m glad I have not had to use your suggestion as of yet.
devsir
On February 6, 2010 at 7:57 am
thought provoking. nice article
mkd1788
On February 7, 2010 at 1:16 pm
nice topic you have shared in this post..
standingproud
On February 7, 2010 at 6:54 pm
oh yes, give of ones self more, and it is so much more for woman than the act like you said.
standingproud
On February 7, 2010 at 6:56 pm
I know of many whom don’t participate, WE need skin contact.
Give me some loving !!!
T. S. GARP
On February 7, 2010 at 9:11 pm
Sex is good for you. Keeps us healthy and romantic sex is the best. Sex is part of life, we wouldn’t be here without sex, and having loving relationship is mora natural than not. Good article.
TheStayAtHome
On February 7, 2010 at 11:48 pm
wow… that was actually a very interesting read. great work!=D
BradONeill
On February 8, 2010 at 6:17 pm
that is a very good article lilly with some excellent pointers. Communication is the key to a happy and fulfilling sex life.
jaysland
On February 8, 2010 at 8:27 pm
I believe women for the most part are a lot more complicated than men. Men are basic creatures, good food and good sex and we are happy. On the other hand, we men have this fantastic desire for woman, she is complicated, usually a multitasking, thinking individual, who at one time a turn on may work for her and the next time not. I think God designed us so different, that we spend a life time trying to figure one another out. Through pain and difficulty we can become as one in spirit as we are constantly in the union of flesh. I think sex is the glue that helps hold marriages together and a sexless marriage is not a very healthy one. Sex is also the unstoppable desire that God designed for us to procreate and continue this humanity that He began. In marriage, sex can be the most fulfilling because you are soul bonding and not just acting out a physical desire.~ Jay
BeatsMe
On February 9, 2010 at 10:17 am
Nice analysis.
John Paul V
On February 9, 2010 at 7:09 pm
Nice, well written!….40million?!?1 damnnn
Sharif Ishnin
On February 11, 2010 at 9:13 pm
Count me out on that type of arrangement. Really interesting one.
seema1962
On February 12, 2010 at 12:58 am
Very well said sex is the spice and life is the food.Nice article. see u in my articles.
devsir
On February 13, 2010 at 12:44 pm
Nicely written
I liked it
Anuradha Ramkumar
On February 15, 2010 at 12:32 pm
Excellent topic. I never knew there are people who live with an arrangement like this. I believe sex helps in reliving those unnecessary tensions and stress.
Authoress Terry E. Lyle
On February 17, 2010 at 3:11 pm
When you take sex out of the game then expect a lot of fouls.
nate
On February 18, 2010 at 4:29 pm
Well written article ! Most answers seem to be from the younger folks and thats great, they have alot of issues also.
Well I’am older my wife and I are mid 60s and sex up here in these upper numbers aren’t great.
We hadn’t had sex in about my guess is 30 years! (no joke)
We had nothing when we started out,clothes and old clapped out car. We worked hard from the day we got married till
I was able to retire. I had to be at work on my wedding night, and my wife the next day. We only had sex occasionally, when
our paths crossed . We managed to fit in two kids and after that
we quit having sex and hadn’t had it since. Life was hard but we managed as great friends, room mates.Marrige is no bowl of cheeries.
lillyrose
On February 19, 2010 at 12:47 pm
nate I wish I could reply to you personally. Thank you for your honest and frank comment. I love to see you and your wife are still great friends and room mates. Cuddling has its compensations!
Uma Shankari
On March 4, 2010 at 7:20 am
Very interesting article and interesting comments.
The Last Ogre
On March 25, 2010 at 8:04 pm
I believe sex is just a part of a married life. But, some wouldn’t live without one lol. A good write, my friend.
amilia snow
On April 6, 2010 at 9:15 pm
nice piece! refreshing.
ken bultman
On April 13, 2010 at 4:13 am
Hi. Found this on Stumbleupon. Necessity is the mother of invention. Hence, the little blue pill.
Bruce Officer
On November 7, 2010 at 12:38 pm
I wouldn’t say that sex less than 10 times a year makes a relationship sexless. Less than once a year maybe, but this is a prime example of how shifting the definition can make a problem seem more or less prevalent, depending on what you want to portray. Kinda like the binge drinking figures too!