Him

I saw you and I wanted to talk to you, I talked to you and I wanted to kiss you, I’ve dreamt about making love to you. I have called out your name. If I could spend five minutes with you, without him seeing me, it would get me through the next day, until I could see you again. I’ve dreamt about us sneaking away somewhere where no one could find us. A secret place that only belongs to me and you. She won’t see you, and he won’t find me. No one will ever know. I would rather spend ten minutes in your arms than a lifetime in his. He will never know the secret feelings that I have for you.

I try not to look at you for to long, for fear someone will notice, will they be able to tell that I can’t stop thinking of you. Can they tell that if you would just look at me that I would fall? I read once that it takes a minute to find someone; an hour to appreciate them; a day to love them; and A LIFETIME TO FORGET THEM. I understand what that means, before I met you, I didn’t. I didn’t know that this could happen. I didn’t know that you could care for someone you didn’t know, someone you haven’t spent time with. If you felt the same what would I do? I’m safe in my secrecy, I’m safe from rejection. To love from a far, I understand. I could never tell you how I feel.

I could never share our secret place not even with you. I talk to you and hide my thoughts, I talk to you about nothing important, avoid your eyes, avoid your accidental touch. At the same time hoping for it, begging for it. I caught your eyes once; I thought that you shared the same thoughts. So I looked away quickly. I couldn’t take it if I thought you might feel the same.

You see as long as I am the only one who feels this way there is no possibility of being hurt, no possibility of pain. If you felt the same, would our secret place be ruined? What would happen, could we be together? Would they be hurt, or would we be hurting ourselves? So I will love you from a far, and never tell you how I feel, I will keep my own secret to protect us from ourselves…