How to Stay Married

So you want to stay married. Even though you have put up with the endless arguments over money, how to raise the kids, when to go out and where to go on vacation, who likes and hates whose friends, not to mention those meddlesome in-laws and relatives sticking their nose into your personal life!

Why should he get all the toys; the motorcycle, the stupid 1966 mustang convertible, the piece of crap pin ball machine, pool table, marble counter top for the basement bar and that stupidly monstrous big screen TV to watch the superbowl on with his drunken mouth breathing, beer swilling, knuckle dragging, homunculus college football buddies!

Why should she have a minimum one hundred pairs of shoes, some of which cost more than a set of car tires, new clothes every other day, all those ‘me’ days for manicures, hairstyle, mud baths, or whatever the hell they are; and those expensive psychoanalysis sessions to deal with all her stressors! No to mention her cackling nagging big haired big butt girlfriends that are always coming over at the absolute wrong times; no time is the right time.

Then there’s the kids! The spoiled rotten little beasts! Why are they in every friggin thing going! Dance class, baseball, soccor, hockey, down hill ski or golf memberships; the list is endless. New cell phones or iPods every six months because they left their’s in the rain, or dropped it in the pool, or it was stolen out of the change room. Why would you need to text message when you could talk. A generation ago kids we played with a stick and a rock and had a damned good time doing it!

Its time to STOP! And then its time to leave each other ALONE! Let him be him, and let her be her.

We choose to be offended, no one person has the power to offend us, we are doing it to ourselves. Just decide differently. Modern day self-help guru Dr. Wayne Dyer said to make drastic changes to your thinking repeat the following little axiom to yourself throughout your day and your life will be very different. “Change the way you look at things, and the things you look at change.” People, places and things are just that; people, places and things. They have no value judgement attached to them, they are neither good nor bad, until you assign them with a label. If you don’t know a person you can’t decide to be offended by them now can you? They could be a royal pain in the ass but you are not making a value judgement so they are not offending you. It is very easy to be offended, the list of encounters you have every day with anyone could offend you if you wanted it to. To be offended all you have to do is choose to be offended.