Have you and someone else—a friend, family member or someone else in your life—drifted apart or have not seen each other for quite a time? And no matter what you try to do, neither of you run into each other? Is the curiosity of whether or not they care about and miss you keeping you up at night? Then let’s get that curio out of the box!
Tips (and warnings):
1. Ask around. Do both of you share a mutual friend or acquaintance? If you do, you can talk to them about it. Before you mention the friend, use some sort of pretext so it won’t sound strange.
2. Ask about the person. Simply ask the mutual friend something like “How is X doing?” “How’s his job?” “How’s she doing in school?” These questions might start a general discussion of the person, and if they do, read the next step.
3. Ask if the person has mentioned you. As the conversation about the person goes on, ask something like “Has he mentioned me?” Wait for the response, and answer back in a good manner. When the conversation is over, thank the person for listening to you.
5. Search their blog or account with your name. By doing this, you will gauge the person’s opinion of you. If it’s positive, there’s a good chance that they do miss you, and might want to contact you.
6. Try contacting the person directly. Only do this if you were on good terms the last time you were in contact with the person. Otherwise, you might create conflict.
7. Try and go around the situation, if you are too shy to contact them directly. Befriending similar friends, but most definitely not in a disrespectful manner, the person might run into a comment you posted on someone’s photo and then there’s a half chance they will contact you depending if they seen your profile photo. If that does not work, try inviting them to share a group interest online or e-mail them about a “survey” or you are taking of random people on a particular subject. *Wink* You can even make a fake web page about it for everyone you want to contact. Make it look legit. That is only if you are very shy and sneaky. If they want to initiate contact with you, they will. Trust me. If not, they might be shy as well, and probably reading signs as well.
8. Come casual. If you miss someone my best advice, just write them or send them a short message. If they ignore you, either they are shy or not on the same mind frame as you or have moved on and still might hold hard feelings from the past that they do not want back into their life. Do not take it personal. Some people are more sensitive than others.
9. Contacting someone who you were on bad terms with the last time you met isn’t recommended. Not only will the person be upset, but they might also press charges for harassment or stalking.
10. Don’t use this method for stalking or anything related to such activities. Not only is it illegal, but can as well be beyond terrifying for the victim.
- Only use the tips when there’s a chance of rebuilding some sort of relationship.
- If the person you are considering contacting is a one whom you we’re in an abusive relationship with in the past, consider talking to someone you trust (a close friend, teacher, counselor, parent, etc.) before actually connecting with this person. It is not unusual to want to try and “make things right” with someone from your past, but do not take any chances with your safety or the safety of others.
- Some people will not accept any reconcile, and that is fine. Usually, people who are in your life have the same outlook as you do, or are going through a similar situation or life phase. People connect to promote growth and sometimes the ship sails and it is time to pick up different passengers.