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Men: How to Handle a Breakup

This provides the man with information regarding why breakups occur, how to see them coming, and how to handle it with minimal emotional strain.

We’ve all been there at one point or another:  Sitting at home, alone, flipping through the channels on our television – though we’re not really watching anything.  In fact, we’re more or less just staring off into the distance.  Every inkling of a noise that our phone makes draws our complete and total attention:  Is it a call?  A text? 

Being dumped is a hard process on any individual, man or woman.  In our society, however, men are usually thought to handle the qualms of heartbreak without too much pain, though that usually isn’t the case.  Perhaps it’s our own stubborn fault, as we’re often too prideful to admit that we’re hurting.  Unfortunately, there is not many pieces of literature out there that aims to help a man experiencing heartache. 

I’ve got a friend who was recently dumped after a three year relationship.  The girl told him that he had changed too much over the past few years, and that she couldn’t go on loving the “new him.”  This, of course, caused a snowball affect in his mind – he called every single person he could and asked them to forgive him for changing.  He and I talked a lot during this period of time, because he couldn’t find any literature to assist him in his time of need.  I gave him every bit of breakup advice I could, and that is what I wish to pass on to you, the reader.

Before the Storm Hits

In all honesty, when a relationship is falling apart, there are tale-tale signs.  Often times, a woman will make up her mind to end a relationship days, or even weeks, before she actually sets anything in stone.  Perhaps she is sub consciously giving the male one last chance of redemption, or perhaps she is simply weary of the events to come.  If you know what you’re looking for, the end may not come as such a surprise.  Here are a few of the classic signs that the end is inevitable:

Heightened Aggression

When a woman decides that things aren’t really working out as well as she had hoped, she will place the man in a certain category.  Though I’m sure there has been much social scientific study into this category, there isn’t a formal name for it.  We’ll call this category “I sleep with you, but you annoy me.”  Once the man is in this category, anything he does (be it trying to cuddle, a hug, making a joke about her shoes) will warrant a swift and immediate reaction, usually sparking an argument.  If this happens more than once a day for an extended period of time, you can be sure that things will end soon.

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User Comments
  1. Sid

    On September 1, 2008 at 9:11 pm

    Did you by chance write this specifically for me??? I wish you’d written it two months ago, and I’d read it at that time. I have been in pain and depressed. I started smoking again 2 1/2 years after having quit. But you know what, my friend, your words make sense, and are what I need right now. I have made those errors about which you write, and I am truly ashamed. So I herewith make this statement: my ex is &^%$ing loony. I had nearly nothing to do with the breakup; she is just outright mental. I loved her to death, but now I announce the death of my feelings for her. And I WILL move on now.

    Thanks mate…I really appreciate your words!


  2. Liz

    On September 28, 2008 at 8:41 pm

    Women are crazy?! Maybe the fact that you go around thinking we’re all a bunch of nutjobs is the reason you keep getting dumped.

  3. Kay

    On October 22, 2008 at 11:37 pm

    Your article does seem a little unfair to women. Women face many of the same issues that you attribut to men. If blaming your breakup on the fact that your girlfriend’s a girl gets you through it better, that’s great. I just don’t think that will be an attractive attitude to carry with you for very long. As Liz points out, women will want to break up with you if you treat them like they’re crazy…

  4. Roger

    On January 7, 2009 at 2:09 am

    Well ladies, i’m not on either side here, but he does have a point, some women do change their minds as often as they breathe if not more, some can also be colder than santa’s toilet bowl if not heated, but i’m not generalising here, some men are genuinely cold and harsh and some are the mythical princes in fairy tale with a day job – facts are facts and i’m not being defensive. I’ve met, dated and had relationships with women both kind and cold. Perhaps the writer just havent yet met the right match for him yet. But ladies, when deciding something, please reserve some thought for the men, some of them may genuinely be in love with you that you just dont know it yet, we are human too you know, as much as some of us are proud of our “manly attitude” we do have an emotional soft side as well, just dig deeper.

  5. Eddy

    On September 29, 2009 at 4:27 pm

    This article is great. And it is so true. I am recently going through a breakup and I am definitely going to take your advice. Thanks again!!!

  6. Tom

    On October 20, 2009 at 6:09 am

    I also think that was written just for me – thanks for that – it really helps to hear im not alone and I definately think your advice will help me heal quicker and get my confidence back.

  7. RAJ

    On November 26, 2009 at 11:00 am

    hey, i love your article, it’s so realistic, i was dating this gal for 5 months and she was the one who intiated for our relationship, we were good, loving, kisses n hugs etc but that crazy f**k b***h, was so indecisive.
    Nobody can believe that she changes her mind very fast and i was surprised…what happened, oneday she text me that “i had made some decision for our future n it’s better for us to get seperated” n i was so surprised n can’t think of anything but to kill that stupid bi**h, but then i did something very good, which all should we do,, ask her to meet yu for last time n talk to her and make her realize it was all her fault, not your’s,,yu will feel good,
    Delete her all emails,all friends list,all phone numbers n memories, facebook contacts….best thing to do is that ,if yu hav some present from her,,,when yu go n meet her for the last time,, break it in front of her,,,n tell her that was our relationship,
    secondly,, go n hit gym or anything which makes u tired…it will help or listen to music or go out with ur frns to the comedy show…

    Ask, the ur frns to plan a road trip or leave the town for a weekend,,and i promise when yu comes back, your whole life will changed..yu will forget her but firstly, yu had to hate her,, so, deal with this,, when they decide to leave yu.. that’s it, they will never ever come back to yu…
    even, if she comes back,,, Damn!! your life will be a prisoner, follow her orders, she will always keep checking yu and yu will loose ur all freedom n independence……So,, bro, go ahead,, because LIFE NEVER STOPS FOR NOBODY…..HAV FUN

  8. the r-man

    On January 2, 2010 at 10:05 am

    my girlfriend says we didnt have a spark between us, and its vacation, and as young as i am, i could not see her except for one day…….believe me, we had a spark, but its the new year and she said she wants to start over…i love the girl, but i dont know what to do. we’ve only been together for a full month too!!!

  9. Keegan J.

    On April 12, 2010 at 2:45 am

    I’ve been through a ton of break ups… well one of them was ton by itself (because my ex was fat and so was the guy that she was cheating on me with hehehe), but the guy is right! Women are crazy! It’s not unfair, it’s true. I’m completely straight and after being engaged twice, and never having an affair (not even a hug with another girl) it is easy to see. Women, you do change your minds a lot. Who spends 45min. (or more) just trying to pick out something to wear? Just find something that looks good, and it will save everybody a lot of time and frustration. Men constantly have a day when they just say… why am I even with this bitch? However, we just go on and let the thought pass and all is right in the world again. Women on the other hand… most of the time are compulsive. You get that thought, and then think of what is (or more likely what in YOUR mind is wrong at that second), and then decide to end it… Just to re-cap, the article is spot on and women are crazy. It’s like a circle of life.

  10. jhay

    On September 2, 2010 at 1:25 pm

    I bought a manual called save a breakup system from and I gotta admit it helped me a lot, this manual teaches you tricks how to get your ex back, how to heal a broken heart, and how to breakup if you want to..I love it and it works great

  11. sdizzle

    On September 19, 2010 at 7:16 pm

    Just broke up last week and I swear you have just saved my life. Thank You! THANK YOU!

  12. Gjs

    On January 22, 2011 at 4:14 am

    hey really thnx a million this is a great help i was in pain and depression and jst was searching for someone to help was even ready to go for a psychiatrist for some help but this article helped me a lot

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