One Sure Fire Way to Love the Ones You Love
Loving sure seems to be a disaster when the person you’re with the most is not loved. That person is you! This is about loving yourself and letting that emanate out to others.
Love is so beautiful. I think that most people would agree. I am coming from no different angle with this. I just want to talk about love. When you feel love, it is the most intoxicating feeling. You know what I mean?
When I started feeling love for myself and everyone, then I was able to accept love from others. It is not that we don’t have love in our lives. Not for most of us anyhow. It is that we do not know how to receive the love that is being given. Really, this was my first question to God. Lord, teach me how to love. How do I love myself and others? I hope that the answer that I got may help you.
Love yourself first. Sounds selfish, doesn’t it? Well, it is. We are a truly selfish people. I know that some ears may be burning right now. The first law of nature is self preservation. So do you think that you are exempt? No. You must take care of all of your needs first. I even go as far as saying take care of some of your wants. This type of love is selfless. Because now that you are filled up with love, then you have more love to share with others.
Let me explain. When you wake in the morning, then you wash yourself and take care of your nourishment. If you are a mom, you know you must do this first or you may never get to it after getting the children together. This is where I am coming from. When you are all taken care of, then you feel really good about giving. It is hard to give when you feel unfulfilled. Now here is the kicker you have to give to feel fulfilled. Wow, take care of myself first and give at the same time. How do I do it?
Can you give and take care of yourself at the same time? Yes, a resounding yes! You can only see others through your own eyes. There is no other way. When you are doing for yourself and handling your needs, then you are saying, “I am worthy and I deserve the best.” Now, your vision for everyone else has been set up. The way you feel about yourself, is how you feel about others. There is no other way. So, now that you feel worthy and deserving, you can give joyfully to others, because you feel that they deserve to feel the same way you do.
Allow me to put that last paragraph into a picture. When you feel bad or “down and out,” you may say harsh things. You may ignore people or give people nasty looks. You feel bad, so you send out your “you should feel bad too” vibe. When you feel good, then you do the complete opposite. You smile at people. You say nice things and you are very aware and attentive to your surroundings. You can easily try this out any day of your life and see that it is true.
So, go ahead and love yourself. Find yourself deserving. Don’t ever sacrifice yourself for others (unless it is a life or death situation). When you are worthy of having the best, then and only then will you be able to see others as worthy and deserving. What’s the use in giving with a bad attitude? Be happy about giving by being fulfilled first. The funny part about this is that the more you give to yourself, and pass that love on, then the more others will give to you. It works. I am a witness.
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User Comments
Dee Huff
On April 27, 2008 at 4:10 am
Food for thought.
nobert soloria bermosa
On April 27, 2008 at 6:53 am
perfectly said Gerlaine,
love begets love..
ira camile
On April 27, 2008 at 8:46 pm
you are inspiring… true! you can’t love others if you don’t love yourself!
Gerlaine
On April 27, 2008 at 11:09 pm
Thank you Dee, Nobert, and Ira…I can’t thank you enough for your support!
Lucy Lockett
On April 27, 2008 at 11:30 pm
I have to agree with you on that one but it can be difficult to remember it all the time. I keep trying too.
Gerlaine
On April 28, 2008 at 5:19 pm
Thanx Lucy…You’ve got to keep trying. I know I will. G
Susan
On April 28, 2008 at 6:01 pm
It is truly important to put yourself first, however like Gerlaine and Lucy I agree that sometimes that can be easier said than done. After many years of trying to do just that, I finally did it this past weekend when I spent the very first time away from my family. I had two beautiful days alone in VA and realized how much it is necessary to do “you first” whenever possible. Next trip will definitely be a lot longer, and to all parents that don’t take time to pamper yourself please do. You’ll be amazed of how carefree you can be without children/spouse. It was truly great to be reminded how much fun one can really have when the time arises and your capable to
Thanks Gerlaine.
think of you first.
Gerlaine
On April 30, 2008 at 10:22 am
Susan,
Congratulations on taking time out for yourself. Because as an American woman, that is courageous. ~G
Liane Schmidt
On July 24, 2008 at 1:51 am
Beautiful article Gerlaine. Wonderful and beautiful like you!
Blessings.
Sincerely,
-Liane Schmidt.
Babajide Akinyele-Williams
On August 8, 2008 at 8:05 am
Hi Gerlaine. This is great. I absolutely agree with you that the most important thing in life is for me to love myself. Every other meaningful achievement starts from there. This sure is an excellent article.
Let me also thank you for all your wonderful comments about my articles. I wrote several earlier on in the year, but then I’ve not been keeping tabs for months which is why I’ve not responded to your kind words much earlier. Thank you so much. I’ll definitely keep in touch from now on.
Gerlaine
On August 20, 2008 at 6:31 pm
Thank you Liane and Babajide for your wonderful comments. Love and Peace. ~G
Judy Sheldon
On September 15, 2008 at 7:47 pm
Gerlaine, what awesome words. It seems we need reminded of this constantly, because as women we are nurturers. We must first nurture ourselves before we can nurtures anyone else. Didn’t we eat when we were pregnant? We first “fed” ourselves, and must remember to keep our priorities straight in order to take care of family and friends.
Take care and God bless.
Gerlaine
On September 18, 2008 at 11:07 am
Thank you for your comment Judy! We do have to prioritize.
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