Pour on the Honey: How to Turn on the Charm to Get What You Want
Do you envy those who seem to get whatever they want, when they want? Find out how to boost your charm factor and reap more out of life.
- Market yourself. Just as you would design, plan and package a product for sale, work on your image to maximize your charm. The key is to come across as someone people will like to get to know and be with. Think about the things you like about the people you meet (they always take care not to have bad breath, they are always well-groomed or they never answer the phone in a huff, not even at 3 am). Etiquette and grooming are skills that no charmer should be without!
- Learn to like people. Charmers are people people, they like learning about others, talking to them and being with them. Learning to like people is important, because your approval of others conveys itself through your body language, and has a positive impact on the other person. Practice being honest with your emotions, and don’t be afraid to show your interest in others’ lives. After all, everyone’s favorite topic of conversation is themselves.
- Brush up on your reading. Work that online mag subscription – reading helps keep you up to date and provides you with tidbits for general conversation. You can help break the ice with a new acquaintance by talking about the positive future of nanotechnology, or put that exchange student at ease by exhibiting knowledge of the culture of their country.
- Become a better speaker. There’s a reason why they call famous flirts silver-tongued charmers. Who hasn’t rolled their eyes at nervous people who stutter with ums and ahhs and a whole lot of errs besides. They just don’t make a positive impression. Polishing your verbal skills such as smoothness of delivery and tone, even the choice of words can make a difference in the perception of the listener. There’s no doubt that a witty and verbose speaker makes listening much more interesting, and there’s nothing like using the proper words to get your point across more succinctly!
Savvy tricks up a charmer’s sleeve
The Lesser Evil: Want to convince your reluctant husband to get home earlier to pick up the kids from school for you? You need to start by making an impossibly large request, such as asking him to be in charge of dinner every night, followed by a lesser evil: picking up the kids from school.
Start Small: Getting your colleague to help you with your projects is easier if you ask her to do just a small part at first. Once someone has agreed to help you with a small favor, they are generally more amenable to helping you to do more.
The Iceberg: So named because you start with a very small, reasonable request, then up the ante as soon as the first one is agreed to. Get your friend to agree to bring a small snack for your Christmas party, then add that it would be nice if she could bring a main dish along, too.
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