Are you lying to your spouse about money, or are they lying to you. Here are a few reasons a spouse will lie about money.
Nothing good can come out of a lie especially if it is a spouse lying about money. Why would a spouse do this anyway?
Well, the first thing let us start with one of the worst cases why a spouse would lie about money. They may be having an affair. Although it is a horrible thought, it happens every day. A spouse starts seeing someone else, so they start spending money on them.
Second and just as dreaded is that they are supporting a habit. By this I mean drugs, gambling, alcohol et cetera. If they make $1000.00 a week but only come home with $500.00, you really should ask them what is going on. Now this is one situation where an intervention is extremely necessary.
Third is a situation that applies to mostly women, although men do it to, is excessive spending. One spouse will go out and buy expensive items and not tell their spouse. Of course, if the spouse regularly checks the bank or credit card statements, they are surely going to notice a drop in the balance of the account or increase in the payments.
Fourth simply telling your spouse that you bought something on sale when you paid full price and paid a lot for it, this is a lie itself. You may think that you are protecting your spouse when you are really hurting him/her.
Unfortunately many marriages begin with lies. When a person owes a lot in debts and does not tell their spouse, that is a lie also. Again, you are not helping or protecting you are hurting. Once you are married you and your spouse’s finances are one. Therefore, lying to him/her about debts that you owe can put their credit in jeopardy also.
Now on to the lies that a spouse really thinks is not lying. When one spouse is putting aside money to save for emergencies et cetera and not telling their spouse about it, they are lying to them. So many people think, however, that if their spouse knows about the extra money they may use it for something frivolous. Some people keep extra money from their spouse because they think that they will lend it to someone the first time they cry to them.
Many people will lie about money just to avoid a confrontation with their spouse. They feel it is easier to hide how much they spend instead of having a heated discussion about the cost and why they bought it in the first place.
One reason for a spouse to lie is that they feel their mate will think what they want to buy is extremely unnecessary. Thus, they will get into an argument about it. So, the person just does not tell their spouse they want it and are going to buy it.
Alright, now that you know a few money lies in marriages, what can you do to prevent it.
First and foremost, be honest, open, and willing to accept advice from your spouse. Sometimes your spouse may actually know what they are talking about. Listen to them.
Second, if the financial infidelity is getting out of hand, you may want to think about hiring a financial planner.
Third, before going into a marriage talk openly with your soon to be spouse about any debts you may owe or any other money matters.
Last but not least, every month go over all of your bank and/or credit card statements together. This will never be a problem as long as you have nothing to hide.
In conclusion, lying to your spouse about money is wrong in every way. Many marriages have ended in divorce because of money problems and lies.
Personal experience of helping a friend through divorce after spouse lied to her about money (and other things)