Are you lonely and looking for romance?  You say, “yes, but why can’t I seem to find it?”  “I see people everywhere, but the world is so busy and moving so fast it seems the attractive ones disappear before I can decide how to approach them.”

That’s the point!  Stop trying to CATCH them on the run.  Instead, purposefully make all occasions become romantic encounters of discovery.  After all, romance is a deliberate pursuit, so be deliberate about it.  How?  Slow down and “make” occasions for romantic encounters.  What do I mean?

Plan occasions that will maximize your opportunity to meet the kind of person you are looking for.  Do you love to dance?  If you love to dance, then why are you vegging at home dancing alone?  Boring!  Ummm, and how do you suppose you will encounter romance at home alone?  Get out there in the world and dance.  There are all kinds of dance companies out there.  Guess what?  All the people who go there are not hooked up.  Dance itself is very romantic.  Learn new dances with new people.  Don’t forget, married or other couples do know  single people.  Oh, you forgot, huh?  (chuckle) 

It’s all about expanding your horizons.  Take what you already love or enjoy and find places to do it where you are most likely to find others with the same interests.  What do you think the chances are if you go to a dance studio that: hello, the people there might be interested in dance.  “Oh my gosh!”, you say, ”like that would be so much easier. I mean,  to strike up conversation would be so much easier because we would have the same interests.”  Wow! What a revelation. I know. I am too funny.

Think about it!  People, including you find themselves miserable trying to discover unique ways to make an extraordinary occasion happen in order to have romantic encounters of discovery when the answer is ordinary and simple.  Stop trying so hard!

Let all of your interests in life become occasions for romantic discovery.  The internet is a great place to find people with similar interests in your area.  Talk about a one-stop shop.  Oh man!  This is the most poorly utilized means to make all occasions become a romantic encounter of discovery.  What’s the problem?  People just don’t take it from the net to the real world occasion.  They just superficially entertain each other for hours hiding behind a screen.  Get off the screen and make the occasion happen, you romantic slouch.

“How could I ever do that?”, you ask. Too dangerous, right? The other person might be a serial killer or something.   Ummm, what about that sexy stranger you drew close to in the supermarket: couldn’t they be a serial killer too?  This is the most rediculous excuse I have ever heard, but I hear it all the time.  Nobody is asking you to become a total idiot in order to meet a sexy stranger?

What do I mean?  Let’s go back to the sexy stranger you drew close to in the supermarket.  You know, the one you never really had the nerve to talk to even though they could feel your breath hot on their neck.  Yes, that one.  Okay, suppose you did get up the nerve and you managed to get a phone number and agreement to go out sometime.  Would you go on that date alone? Would you go to a busy public place with lots of other people around?  No, the police station is not a good place for a first date.  Oh my: I kill myself with laughter.  Of course you would go in a group setting or schedule a date in a busy public place until you get to know your sexy stranger better.  Drop the excuses and make all occasions become romantic encounters of discovery.

Be creative. Think about it!  Maybe after making friends on websites, you can become the party planner.  Organize a cruise for those interested in travel and send out invites.  Hey, people love a person who knows how to plan a good time, and guess what?  They can’t wait to introduce that exciting person to all of their friends, especially their single friends.  The beauty of being one who organizes the event, is that you, by virtue of your new responsibility have very good reason and open door to talk to everyone.  You wouldn’t want to leave anyone out, would you?  Especially not the few mysterious and sexy strangers you have grown curious about.  No awkward approaches, just an occasion for romantic discovery.

Be purposeful.  Go to sites or places that inspire the deepest passion in you.  Passion is what draws people together more than anything, but romance is what keeps the passion burning between people.  Even your interests can lose there passion if you don’t feed them with new things, new experiences, new perspectives or new places and ways to share those passionate interests.

Be a learner.  People are intrigued by well-rounded people whose knowledge or abilities surprise them regularly.  Smart is sexy as long as you share your smart stuff in sexy fashion.  People don’t like a know it all: more rightly stated as someone who believes they know it all, all the time and makes sure everyone knows it. Smart sexy is different.  This is just someone who takes an interest in learning and contributes what they have learned sparingly as occasion presents itself.  The proverbial know it all asserts their knowledge at all times. Obviously, if you are with a group who doesn’t know their way around the town they are in, but you do and they get lost discovering later you knew the way, but didn’t share it: that’s so not sexy. 

Be a helper.  Always be willing to help others. The more you invest in others, the greater the return.  Find causes you are passionate about, and volunteer.  What, you think the opposite sex won’t be there? (smile)  Get with it sleepy: men and women volunteer last time I checked.  You might try helping the elderly cross the street or shovel their walk. You never know what that son or daughter of theirs is all about.

Be a keeper.  This is the part where you just relax and let all occasions become romantic encounters of discovery without stressing yourself or pressing someone else for the big commitment.  Don’t make it a point to invest yourself “emotionally” in someone you are trying to discover romantically.  Just let it happen.  Enjoy all the smart and purposeful occasions you have made and just let things develop without all the heavy expectations.  Whatever you do, don’t ever force it with someone.  If they don’t seem interested, don’t go over board (beg) them to notice you.  Trust me, if you keep it light, make it fun, enjoy your occasions, plan more occasions then all occasions become romantic encounters of discovery you will always cherish and never forget.

Be on time.  I am not talking about punctuality.  Never talk yourself out of making an occasion. Go for it!  Do it now.  You are right on time when you climb out of your hole and decide to take charge of making the occasion for romance.  It’s never a wrong thing, but vegging at home alone when you can make it happen and be in control is all wrong.  You have something to offer and you can make a perfect occasion happen for yourself and once you have, you will be hooked to do more.  When you have found that romance partner, then you can fan the flames of your passion together and still: all occasions become encounters of romantic discovery.  You just do it together and help others to find it too.

Be naughty at it, but be good!