Secrets for Finding Love and Commitment
by If you’re anything like the countless singles in the world, you probably wonder, if, when, and how you will eventually meet your other half and person of your dreams. You might have even imagined what that person might look like, where they might live and other such parts of your fairytale dream.
…Although visualizing is a very important first step toward making your dreams a reality, keep in mind, in the end:
Dreaming is just dreaming. Without taking chances, action, risking vulnerability again and potential rejection you will end up dreaming for the rest of your life.
Recently, I purchased “12 Secrets for Finding Love and Commitment” by Jeffrey Ullman the founder of Great Expectations, the world’s largest video dating service. I highly recommend it for its insightful, realistic approach to the new dating world; a world where traditional roles are blurred and often confusing, and where more and more people are spending Saturday nights alone rather than risk potential rejection or heartache.
The book was a perfect find for where I am at in my life.
Everything in your life is a mirror of who you are and how you feel about yourself.
Although I’ve always known this logically, having someone recently reiterate it to me, helped solidify the concept in my mind.
And, after re-typing these words I feel the impact more profoundly. This statement really makes you take a step back from your life and see it with more honesty. It also forces you to take full accountability for all the choices you have made and continue to make in your life.
You must fall in love with yourself first in order to be able to fall in love with another person.
Learn from the past. We’ve all made mistakes. Take the time to think about past loves and people you truly care for. Realize now that you must give what you could so easily give them: compliments, care and instant concern about their worries, dreams, etc. Any time that ache for another’s love comes into your heart, remember to say to yourself, if the love of your life was here right now, what would you want them to say or do to make you feel better? Once you have that answer, you must proceed to do that for yourself.
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Post CommentChristine Ramsay
On February 18, 2009 at 5:33 am
A very good article for someone looking for love.
Christine
K Kristie
On February 18, 2009 at 8:37 am
I have to forward this to a couple of friends. Great article.
Bren Parks
On February 18, 2009 at 9:28 am
Great stuff here…it shows a profound wisdom!
clay hurtubise
On February 18, 2009 at 9:34 am
Why when I listen to myself everyone tells me to shut up?
Kidding, nice article.
Thanks,
Clay
Kate Smedley
On February 18, 2009 at 10:31 am
You are so right, in that we are a reflection of everything we do and of our thoughts, it is so important to respect ourselves.
Thanks for a great article.
S Air
On February 18, 2009 at 3:57 pm
Loved this, well done
Keirt
On February 18, 2009 at 4:29 pm
I think I have met that person, I’m not sure if she has met me though
Interesting article, “fall in love with yourself before you fall in love with another person” favourite part. very deep and meaningful
R J Grant
On February 18, 2009 at 4:49 pm
Great advice – If you don’t like yourself, why should anyone else?
However, if there’s something that needs changing – then change it.
Grant
Lee Altman
On February 18, 2009 at 6:43 pm
This was simply wonderful, thanks
Lee
Majic
On February 18, 2009 at 7:27 pm
I’m inspired! Thanks for the wisdom!
CHAN LEE PENG
On February 18, 2009 at 9:08 pm
A piece of wisdom. Thanks.
Eunice Tan
On February 18, 2009 at 9:33 pm
Thanks for sharing. The lesson here is priceless.
rutherfranc
On February 18, 2009 at 10:24 pm
thanks for the tip.. will be forwarding this to friends, I already found mine.
Anne Lyken Garner
On February 19, 2009 at 2:05 am
Having found my soul mate and married him more than a decade ago. I have to say that the person of your dreams is just that – the person of your dreams.
The man or woman you’ve made up lives inside your head and there is no one who fits the entire description anywhere in the world.
What you will find though, is someone who loves you totally and as completely as you need him/her to. When or if you’re blessed to find this person, you should allow that imaginary one inside your head to quickly fade away.
The person you fall in love with may have some common traits as the one that you’ve dreamed about. He/she may not have so much hair, may not have won modelling contracts, may not have a PHd, or my not be as slender. What they will have, is a connection to your soul, one that your mind, even in its wildest of fantasies, could never have fashioned. After all, if you could make this complete spiritual connection all by yourself, in your own mind, you will never again need partner in your life.
We should’nt be afraid to dream of a soul mate, (this is not what I’m saying) and have a guide in our minds as to what he/she should be like. However, when it comes to the real thing, if we’re sensible we will not hold out for that imaginary person who is perfect in every way, except for the fact that they do not exist.
I agree with all the other points.
This is what I try to tell the people with whom I work.
Yovita Siswati
On February 19, 2009 at 2:26 am
very inspirational, full of wisdom too!
MMV Abad
On February 19, 2009 at 3:46 am
I have uncertainties back then if I would ever find my friend and partner in life. But, there is always the right time. I’m glad that I found him
Poetic Enigma
On February 19, 2009 at 12:17 pm
Amazing article, with lots of great tips,
and information, Very well done,
Thanks for sharing (:
Morgana
On February 19, 2009 at 5:31 pm
Good advice, great article
rileyd
On February 19, 2009 at 6:47 pm
Great advice.
Maria Blazz
On February 19, 2009 at 9:59 pm
Here are some very good tips not only for soulmate searchers but for everyone.
OhSugar
On February 20, 2009 at 6:09 am
There is not one piece of your that I have not enjoyed reading, this is no exceptions. Good advice. Thanks for sharing.
Ruby Hawk
On February 20, 2009 at 5:51 pm
The love of your life is not often the man of your dreams. That knight in shining armor is usually a fairy tale but the man who cooks breakfast while you sleep late or gets up in the middle of the night to give the baby a bottle, that is the man you will love and appreciate above all others.
Ella Currence
On February 21, 2009 at 6:54 pm
Your gift from God how wonderful
Coot
On February 22, 2009 at 5:47 am
True- and after finding that soul mate- you need to make time to continue knowing yourself when times are overwhelming, because it’s that person your spouse fell in love with. In other words, marriage, work, children, $, all demand your time so keep loving & being true to yourself amid the whirlwind.
Gail Nobles
On February 22, 2009 at 3:32 pm
Great Article. It’s hard to find the person that you really want.
mradil
On February 22, 2009 at 7:43 pm
beautiful stuff…
kitschkitty
On February 25, 2009 at 3:52 pm
A really well written and inspirational article.
Claudette
On March 2, 2009 at 10:13 am
How wonderful to honestly write about your feelings. Really brave. I applaud you and and a really lovely article. Glad I stumbled upon it.
Colleen Ranney
On March 23, 2009 at 8:34 am
This is very helpful. I also applaud you for this article, you are a great inspiration!
FOREVER POETRY
On April 5, 2009 at 6:28 pm
I’M STARTING TO REALIZE THESE THINGS, SO THINK I’M MAKING MY VOYAGE TO TE NEW ME SOON. I THINK IT’S IMPORTANT TO ADD THAT, IF YOU IMAGINE THE THINGS YOUR SOUL MATE WILL DO TO MAKE YOU HAPPY, YOU SHOULD ADOPT THESE MANNERISMS TOO. THAT BIT OF INFORMATION HAS REALLY EMPOWERED ME.