Succeeding in Love: Six Tips for a Happy, Healthy Union Between You and Your 1st Wife
Everything you need to know for a successful 1st marriage and beyond. In fact, this useful guide for the groom who wants to get along with the bride is a must read no matter what number you’re up to.
Never ever tell her she looks like a celebrity: It does not matter if you compare her to Miss. Universe or Rosanne Barr, she will find something wrong with the girl or at the very least think you secretly desire this person over her. Plus it is inevitable that she’ll have some catty issue with said celeb.
Then there are the various degrees of resemblance to consider. Does she look a little like her, a lot like her or is it just in “this light?” Very dangerous turf to tread and it will always cause you gastritis.
Example
You: “Honey did I ever tell you, you look a little like Demi Moore?”
Her: “What? How much? You mean Ghost or St. Elmos Fire? Did you notice she has a huge fat neck? Is that what I look like? A huge fat necked cry baby who divorces her husband and hooks up with a boy half her age? Nice. Real nice.”
If you must make a comment about her appearance, tell her she doesn’t look a second older than the day she stole your heart.
They eat that crap up.
If she comes to you with a “great idea” and it doesn’t include football, beer, cheeseburgers or modeling lingerie – go with it: Whatever you do don’t resist. Females see this as a sign of defiance and will greet it with great vengeance. You WILL end up sleeping in your car or worse – at your parents’ house.
Example
Her: “You know what I was thinking we would do today? Take a drive out to the country and have a picnic with a little sushi, nice baked brie and a spinach quiche. What do you think?”
What you’d better say: “That sounds delightful, my love. Maybe after we could go shopping, or to a spa, you know – completely get away from the tee-vee.”
What you’d better not say: “But then I won’t be watching television. Nah, I think we should just get some wings, a twelve pack and check out the game.”
When (not if) you go shopping with her, make sure you are feminine enough to support her and masculine enough to make her feel confident: (Assuming you answered the example in #2 correctly) If she shows you different outfits or shoes or earrings or what have you and wants to know which you think she should buy, open the estrogen valve and let its soothing flow guide you.
Say something like, “gee sweetie, I really don’t know. I love the cut of that dress and the pink shoes are so cute… but the green on the other dress really brings out your eyes and the black shoes give you a sharpness I didn’t feel from the other outfit. Tell ya what – I’m thinking we should just get them both… you know, so you can choose whenever you want and not just this once.” This is tricky but with lots of practice you should be able to sound sincere.
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