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The Number One Rule for How a Husband Should Treat His Wife

If a husband could only follow one rule on how to make his wife feel truly loved, this would have to be the one to follow. This rule can change a relationship and is worth its weight in gold. Of course, a couple do not need to be married for this to transform their relationship.

In this day and age it is more important than ever for married couples to get on. And if we are being entirely honest with ourselves, we will soon admit that this can take effort. It is not easy being a good husband sometimes, it involves commitment, sacrifice and patience. That is not to say that it is harder to be a good husband than it is to be a good wife, I am quite sure that the same applies (and probably more so) in reverse. But seeing as I am a husband and not a wife, I can only truly write from this perspective.

Any man can be a husband – all you really need to do is show up on your wedding day – but it takes a big man to be a good husband, and as any wife will tell you, there is a world of difference between the two!

So if I had to come up with a single rule for being a good husband it would probably be that you need to learn how your wife expresses love, as this will be how she feels love. Humans are complicated creatures, and each of us have a different way to express and receive love. Some people express love through physical contact – hugs, kisses, holding hands, public displays of affection etc. Where as some of us express love verbally. For others still it involves actually serving others – getting them cups of coffee, running them baths etc. And for others still they may express love through gifts – flowers, chocolates etc. I suppose there are thousands of different ways, or combinations of ways that your wife may express love, these are just examples, but the important thing to do is to watch her and learn.

Husbands, how do your wives express love towards you? Does your wife have your evening meal waiting on you when you come home from work? Or does your wife always buy you things when she is out?

As a husband, you need to think of your wives expression of love as a sign of how she needs to be treated to truly feel love. Take a minute and think about it. This is the moment that may change your marriage forever!

Now think about how you could adjust your life to demonstrate this love back to your wife. As a husband, your most significant role is to make your wife feel loved, so this is important. Remember that all of this reading and thinking will have been pointless unless at the end of it all you do not take action!

Does your wife express love by buying things? Well then make a point of giving her flowers or something else once a week – it doesn’t need to be expensive, just thoughtful.

Does your wife express love by serving you? Then run her a bath some evenings or make her breakfast in bed on Sunday.

These are just examples, there are countless ways for husbands to show love to their wives, you need to work out for yourself what makes your wife tick and then make the effort. And it will take effort. Your wife may well express love differently from how you do, so you will need to change your patterns of living to make your wife truly feel loved. As a husband you might feel awkward, you might even feel silly at first, but this is one of the most important acts as a husband can perform.

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  1. Joanna McKay

    On December 9, 2008 at 10:39 pm


    From a wife’s point of view, it is true from our standpoint as well. In marriage, love is expressed in the “mundane”… the simple everyday things we do for each other. Great read.

  2. James Metcalf

    On December 13, 2008 at 8:31 am


    A well thought out piece of writing. Interesting way of looking at showing love. My wife wud probubly have a heart attack if I cooked her breakfast in bed mind you!

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