Ways to Say “I’m Sorry”

Whoever said “being in love means never having to say sorry” might have been in love, but was definitely not in a relationship! The reality is being in love not only means having to say you’re sorry and having mean it when you know you have done something wrong or hurtful, but also having to say it in such a way that the other party is aware of your sorrow. Perhaps you aimed for below the belt during a fight, bringing up the fact that his mother forgot your birthday two years ago, or vented weeks of frustration built up from an ungrateful employer on an undeserving spouse.

The sorry usually needed to rectify these kind of sticky situations with a significant other is much more than the automatic “oops I’m sorry” – the kind uttered if one accidentally bumps another as they walk by. Even the shocked gasp of an “oh my gosh – I’m so sorry!” exclaimed when you realize you forgot a friend’s birthday, or sympathetic “I’m so sorry” uttered to a grieving soul when someone loses a loved one is not enough. I am referring of course to the most complex of apologies – the one uttered to a wrong loved one. To apologize appropriately in this case is an art in itself as more than one emotion must be conveyed: contriteness, regret, genuine remorse, concern, and the genuine desire to make amends.

Every apology of this sort must come from the heart. It should also probably include an explanation should be included as to how the mistake occurred, your recognition of the pain you’ve caused, and possibly even taking enough responsibility to come up with a plan to prevent it from happening again. That’s the content, but what the form? Well, this writer has canvassed for your viewing convenience several types of apology, common and unusual, literary and substantial.

The poem

Although some might say that nothing relays emotional sentiment quite like poetic verse, this writer would urge one to be cautious. Poetry by its very nature is short and inarticulate – meant to convey a generalized feeling rather than an exact explanation. A haiku, to cite an extreme example, is no more than 17 syllables. If the apology was for forgetting to pick up milk on the way home, a poem might be appropriate. However, even then this writer would suggest writing something at least as long as a limerick and only for an apologee with a very good sense of humor.