What Did It Took?

Taking you a little bit to what the story was, as I had mention on the previous story, many people are on unhealthy relationships, I used to criticize, until I became one of them. It all started with me getting pregnant before marriage. Marrying because of pregnancy is always a bad reason for getting married.Signs of a bad relationship were already present before I got married, but I just ignored them, thinking if things got worse, I was gonna be able to walk away, not knowing that things were about to change. His violence just increased causing the relationship to grow apart.

….A lot of occasion like this repeated them selves over and over again. One day, not so long ago I decided I had enough, and couldn’t take it, so I made the decision of leaving him, but of course and as expected by family and friends that know about the situation, he cried and begged he promised to sign the divorce papers if I give him a last chance he say that one little bad thing he did and I could process the papers and now one month later, I’m sitting here thinking…

WHAT WOULD IT TAKE?

This was the question I had in my mind the day I wrote that. Now I can talk about what did it took. I took one comment my oldest son made that made me realize that staying with him was affecting my kids more than if I leave him. My son wanted to eat some cookies before dinner and I didn’t let him, so he told me he was going to ask daddy to hit me… I couldn’t believe the kind of impact my husband was making in our kids, and me accepting this behavior, made my kids think is ok to hit a woman and I DO NOT want that for my kids.

So, I gave him that chance to improve him self, to show me he could change almost forcing my self to try to be happy with him once again.BIG mistake, things didn’t change much, they weren’t as bad as before, but I finally realized that even if he had change to this perfect dream like husband, that I didn’t love him anymore and he wasn’t making me happy. Once love is gone there’s not much you can do to save a relationship anyways. days before actually moving back with him, deep in my heart I always knew I was doing something that didn’t felt right in my heart, so I tried talking to him about how I felt, but it didn’t work, he blinds him self to the fact that I don’t love him and cannot see it nor accept it. It brakes my heart to see him like that and as much as he hurt me, I don’t hate him. I moved back with him, feeling completely wrong about the whole thing. I knew it made him happy to see me there, but I wasn’t happy. Once back in the apartment, some things didn’t change. He’s always been a VERY jealous & controlling man, and the first time I went to do groceries he demonstrated it once again. Before I left the market, I call him to make sure I had everything. As he was talking to me I was trying to reach one last item he wanted me to bring. I was on my toes trying to reach it and a nice lady that work there (taller than me) offered to help me. He didn’t ask me anything about that on the phone, but said something I couldn’t hear, the call was dropping off so I couldn’t hear anything else he said, when I finally did he asked me where I was and who I was talking to so I told him I was still at the store and I’ll be there in a min…and when I got home.