What is the Central Purpose of Marriage?
by Conservative arguments against same-sex marriage fail upon examination. The writings of Stanton and Maier, Wolfson, Card, Williams, and Rausch form starting points respectively, for the pro and con arguments.
It seems like Claudia Card is arguing that there is no point to marriage at all. It is harder to get out of a bad marriage than a bad relationship and it is harder to prove wrongdoing than get a restraining order. But she does not address why then if same-sex couples should not get married because it is so bad, why it should be preserved for the financial/legal benefits of heterosexual couples only. If getting a divorce is still too difficult, let us make it easier, not just do away with marriage altogether. Same-sex couples should have just as much right as heterosexual couples in getting visitation rights, insurance benefits etc.
Rausch makes a good argument for what marriage is for, “Matrimony creates family out of thin air” (25). It is about kinship and responsibility. At least that is what it is useful for. But except for some royalty still and in cultures that still practice arranged marriage, we do not get married in ways that maximize the benefit to our family in forming an “alliance” with another individual.
If marriage is all about duty, and no fun, what is the point? It seems like a recurrent problem with assigning meaning for anything at all, is that we have cannot have a solid foundation of meaning to build from because ultimate meaning or purpose in life cannot be demonstrated. Therefore any truly teleological perspective brings us to a vacuum. This leaves us with no choice by to construct our own meaning ad hoc, from whatever principles we can justifiably see fit. I cannot think of a better goal than to seek to know thyself. Rowan Williams says, “I can only fully discover the body’s grace in taking time, the time needed for a mutual recognition that my partner and I are not simply passive instruments to each other” (315). It seems we can only really live and really know ourselves, in the layered perceptions of our perception of being perceived by another.
page numbers regarding Stanton and Maier refer to their work, Marriage On TrialRausch references are to From Gay Marriage: Why It is Good for Gays, Good for Straights, and Good for AmericaWolfson references are to Why Marriage Matters: America, Equality, and Gay People’s Right to MarryClaudia Card references are to “Why gays shouldn’t marry”
(http://www.littlemag.com/belonging/claudia.html)& Rowan Williams’ to The Body’s Grace
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