When Our Writing Becomes a Problem in Our Relationship

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Whatever writing project that I’m working on, I am always excited when the idea hits me, during my time working on it, and of course with the finished project. I often can’t wait to share with those closest to me. It is my shining moment, as I hand over the print out, call or text, “check your email,” as I burst with impatience. It “always” feels like my best work, the thrill of finishing something new has never gone away. Fresh off the presses, I’m ready to get my new work “out there.” If I’m working on my book, it’s even harder to contain, because it’s not a finished project that I’m ready to share with the world, or anyone. I can’t let my excitement of my writing cloud up my judgement when it comes to those that I want the most to share my writing with. The reality is that no matter how desperately I want “their approval,” it can become much more complicated than that. If we share our writing with someone close to us, we are choosing to let them deeper into “our world,”an extension into us that may not be easy for them to accept. I’ve gone through this with someone twice recently, and it doesn’t need to take anymore times for me to have learned something new about sharing my writing. As I enter new territory I am learning new challenges with a book I am writing, and specifically with an article I titled, “Lonely no more on Facebook, and Triond?” I’ve had issues come up when writing about ex-lovers in my book, but that I can understand. I need to realize that even though what’s part of my past, someone new in my life doesn’t need to read about it, even though it’s just part of a storyline. “Lonely no more on Facebook, or Triond?” This article brought the question, “why are you so lonely?” I hurt this persons feelings, because they feel that they are not enough for me to take the loneliness away. I’ve never had to worry about what I’m writing before. I do understand, but I’m not about to start feeling as though I need to look over my shoulder with everything I write. I write with something that I always mention, and that’s “my truth.” But, now I am more aware of others feelings around me. In my rush to share my excitement, I didn’t think that “my truth” would be hurtful to them. About my being lonely? It’s just how I feel, and no one can prevent that from happening no matter what happiness they do bring into my life. I thought that it was important to discuss this with her. I explained, “within those feelings are truth, mostly when I’m not with you, and my dog(Sparkie). It’s my space away from what I cherish most in my life that brings me loneliness. A lot of it also has to do with my past. I’m also lonely when I miss the things that I love the most in my life, like when I can’t be outdoors, out in nature, hiking, or enjoying the hot weather(when it’s winter). I am so at peace when I can sit outside in the sun, by the garden, or by the water at the beach. Their is truth within my writing, but within that truth, their is so much more ”deeper” for you to discover.”