What Do I Believe?

I am one of those people who question everything about life. I do not believe in the scientists answer to how life began, as the Big Bang. Consequently, I do not believe in the Church’s creationism.  I do, however, believe in some form of creator, something that created the spark to set the universe going. Not the Big Bang, but what came before the big bang? A big bang does not simply happen! It has to be turned on, fired, like a firework or rocket, to explode and create a Big Bang. Who lit the blue touch paper or pressed the button to fire the rocket?

My own theories on this matter include: (a) an alien throws a cigarette from a passing rocket from another universe, (b) A cybernaut, doing a bit of DIY on his space ship and accidentally triggers one of his nuclear devices, (c) Some kid on a distant planet on a distant universe puts a message in a bottle and throws it into space, it hits a passing spaceship and leads to triggering a Big Bang.

How come I can believe more in a fairy tale of an alien kid, kicking a bottle around on a distant planet on a distant universe, which leads to the creation of our universe, but not the accepted fairy tale of God and his angels creating this universe, as written in the Bible? The problem I have is that the main Gospels were written about AD65 or later. It could not have been much later since the Roman army burnt Jerusalem to the ground in AD72 and slaughtered most of the inhabitants, so it’s unlikely that they were written after this point in time, it is also clear that they were not written much before AD60. It is also very clear that the real authors, the ones who put pen to paper, of the four main Gospels were not Matthew, Mark, Luke and John, since all of them had died long before.  At the time they were alive, when the bible says they were writting the Gospels. Are we to believe that all the disciples suddenly became writers. Not even Paul was aware that these guys were writing biographies of Jesus and he was there when they were alive and suposedly writing the Gospels! You would think that one of them would have asked Paul for his opinion.

Then there  a problem, for me, in the dating of the beginning of the Earth and the Universe as stated in the Old Testiment. Genisis has it about 3,500 years.  Science already tells us that the age of the Earth is about 4.5 billion years old. Science already has it that we, human creatures, had been around in East Africa about 7 million years ago. Carbon dating of the bones of “lucy” come from this period.So its obvious that we, live in general, have been around for many millions of years, growing and evolving to where we are today.

So back to my own problem, the problem of if something or someone created the Big Bang, then something existed prior to the Big Bang – I am now trying to get my head round creatures, living in a universe, long before our universe existed – creating a big bang – why? Maybe it was necessary to create another universe, maybe it was necessary to infuse this new universe with life. Perhaps it was a scientific experiment created by those “ancients” just to see what would happen, they may still be running the experiment or they may have given us up as a waste of time.

If I was to believe word for word in the Bible, I would have to believe that our entire universe is only 3,500 years old. This is something I cannot accept given the colossal amount of scientific evidence – real evidence, not just some Hebrew words on some scrolls, which were translated into several languages, Greek and Latin, to name just two and long before they arrived in a language we could understand, they had been translated to the whims of those that needed some changes made to this group of scrolls before editing it together and presenting it to the world as a “fait accompli”.

Now, if I can see carbon dating as it happens, if I can see missing fossil links in many species – and I can, simply by going to various museums, where can I see the other side of the equation? Where can I see evidence of the “Creation”? Only then can I begin to evaluate which system created me. I am not preaching and I am not in denial, I just wish there were answers.