Getting Through Kamasutra

MANY married couples scramble to find techniques to make their sexual life more satisfying and meaningful and have made best sellers books for sexual skills enhancement. 

Despite all the sexual principles and dozens of techniques they’ve learned and memorized, the contentment they have been yearning for remains as elusive as ever.

I realize, through our experience as a couple for the past 13 years, that the first step to attain a happy sexual life is not Kamasutra or any set of techniques in lovemaking.  The first step is a decision to be happy or sexually satisfied, and the skills in bed only serve as enhancers or tools to attain the desired sexual experience.

Kamasutra, I guess is ill-understood by many who believe that mastering the various positions, taking love potions, and using sexual aids could result in 100-percent satisfaction.

In a broader sense, Kamasutra is the third goal of human life “which is the enjoyment of appropriate objects by the five senses of hearing, feeling, seeing, tasting and smelling, assisted by the mind together with the soul. The ingredient in this is a peculiar contact between the organ of sense and its object, and the consciousness of pleasure, which arises from that contact is called Kama.”(Kamasutra, 1883)

At a closer look, this goal in life is broader than the genital part of human sexuality.

Kamasutra involves various arts, expressing the male and female sexuality. Such includes singing, playing on musical instruments, dancing, writing and drawing; tattooing, spreading and arranging beds or couches of flowers, or flowers upon the ground; coloring the teeth, garments, hair, nails and bodies. 

Kamasutra also involves the cultivation of physical skills like quickness of hand or manual, culinary art, i.e. cooking and cookery, making lemonades, sherbets, acidulated drinks, and spirituous extracts with proper flavor and colour a host of other hobbies that cultivate in a person’s heart an appreciation of the good things our five senses bring.(Kamasutra.com)

In Kamasutra, sex is only a small part of human sexuality.  By sexuality I mean, every person must be a female or male or those who prefer to be “third-sex” in orientation. And every experience we get from our five senses is filtered by our sexual orientation as woman or man or homosexual.

For example, I relate with my husband, children and friends with my awareness and sensibilities as a woman. My sexuality is the wholeness of myself.