You see someone, you think they look gorgeous and you want them.  You lust after them and you must have them.   You smile, they smile back,  you get a tingly feeling go up and down your body and make you glow with anticipation.  You sense that they feel the same and are lingering in the hope that you can start chatting.  You know you want it to lead to more and you pay to God they do too.  You wonder how gorgeous they are when undressed and if you can get to be intimate with them soon.  You are scared to say the wrong thing for fear of putting your foot in it and scaring them off but you know you cannot walk away and at least try your best.

This goes one of two ways.  You were right when you hoped and thought they felt the same way and one thing leads to another and a wonderful time is had by both.  Or you find out you were dreaming the whole thing,  they did not really want you as much as you want them, or they have a partner already and are not interested in or scared to cheat on them.  You tell yourself that you hope you will have better luck next time but you feel deflated and miserable.  You cannot help but take it seriously, even though this person does not know you so it cannot be personal.

How do you know what to say to them or when someone wants you… and how do you cope when they say no?  Love, lust, passion and romance can be such tricky things but so wonderful when they work out well.  Of course if you are very young and it is your first crush or lustful situation it all seems scary as well as exciting, you get confused but you cannot bring yourself to stop.  As you get older you learn from experience and as you become more successful and get some lovers and relationships under your belt it becomes easier and easier.   Chatting people up,  meeting them, dating them and sleeping with them becomes easier, fun and normal the more you do it.  Some love the idea of getting into a solid serious committed relationship others prefer to fiddle around with casual things and move on quickly.  Whichever way you prefer it is how you get your kicks.  The trick is to find someone or other people who feel the same and who want you so that you are not rejected.

Having worked as a private relationship expert, life coach and therapist for many years I have found that when someone is repeatedly rejected it is either because they do not say the right things to the other persons, or they are far too shy and quiet or they show a lack of disrespect to people.  For example,  when you go into chat rooms online you get men who are quick to ask women their measurements and address assuming that they can rush around for sex with them the same day.  Of course,  they are living in a dream world and never succeed and do not understand women or show them respect.  Perhaps if the same man was to be more polite and realistic he would have found someone who wanted him.

To be in love with the person you are with as well as in lust with them is the best.  It is a win win situation.  There is excitement, passion, fun without any of the risks or problems you get with constantly finding a new person.

To read more of my articles about love, relationships and sex look on this site,  also Helium.com has hundreds of articles on this subject by me,  just type in my name, Carmel Brulez.  You can contact me and read a lot more about me on my website at carmelbrulez.homestead.com.  I and my staff are too busy to check this website. If you have any comments or queries you want to bring to our attention you must do this through my website.