Sex, Sex and More Sex!

When the Beijing Olympics ended, the Chinese were left with a condom conundrum!  They had produced 100,000 of said items which were handed out free to athletes but they had 5,000 left over.  So the ever resourceful country decided to get rid of them by way of a ‘once  in a lifetime’ auction on 29 November 2009.  The starting price is said to be 1 yuan each (the equivalent of 15 cents in the US or 8 pence in the UK).  Each condom bears the motto of the Games – faster, higher, stronger – in both English and Chinese languages but if anyone out there thinks they’re going to be able to get onto Ebay and get their hands on one on 29 November, it’s been stated that all 5,000 must be sold to one buyer.

Presumably once a buyer has been found he’ll want to sell these on at a profit so maybe we’ll be able to go onto Ebay just prior to Christmas and buy a nice little ’stocking filler’ for Grandad!!!

The next tale involves a 59 year old woman (known as Alice) who suffered from temporary amnesia after having sex with her husband, Scott!  Apparently after sex they had turned on the TV and the Beijing Olympics was showing but Alice had no recollection of there being any Olympics at that time.

Scott asked his wife what day it was and she was unable to answer.  He then asked her who the President was and she responded that it was Bill Clinton.  Scott, seeing that something was amiss and instantly thinking Alice had had a stroke, called for an ambulance.  On arriving at the hospital neurologists diagnosed TGA (Transient Global Amnesia) which is a relatively common experience in over 50s and usually occurs after climax.

TGA is caused by pressure in blood vessels and can be triggered by strenuous activities such as bowel movements or sex; it’s also more prevalent for those people who suffer from migraines and severe headaches!  So if you’re over 50, suffer from constipation and migraines and have an active sex life just watch out!!

Unfortunately, although Alice has regained her memory, she still has no recollection of her sex romp with Scott but sounds as if it must have been a bit of an Olympic gold medallist to have had that effect on her!

And now to a rather bizarre sex story from the unlikely venue of West Ham Station in London!  Commuters on their way home during the rush hour, instead of hearing the usual unintelligible tannoy messages of delays due to leaves on the line, train breakdowns and the usual annoyances that one suffers on public transport here in the UK, they were surprised to hear the sounds of a copulating couple over the tannoy system!!

A spokesman for London Transport said that the noises weren’t from the Station but were probably due to some sort of interference with the public address system but it most certainly wasn’t from their staff.  He went on to say that the staff had turned off the loudspeakers as soon as they realised what was happening.

One of the commuters commented that the man was rather loud and the woman ’sounded as if she was enjoying herself’!  She also added that the driver obviously heard it too as he left the doors of the train open longer than usual!!!