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When a Guy Can’t Get It Up

Sometimes you fail to have an erection strong enough for intercourse. So what do you do when it happens?

“Many couples have fulfilling sexual relationships without penetrative sexual intercourse – not all men need to have potency restored.”

I wonder how many men deprived of penetrative sexual intercourse actually agree with this statement. I certainly do not. Thing is, back when I was a teenager and still trying to get laid all the time, more often than not my lady friends would not allow me to go all the way with them. Naturally, I would accept whatever was offered to me because I was at that period when hormones start to rage furiously so much that my hand fast became my best friend yet secretly wished for genuine sexual intercourse from whichever girl was willing to do it with me.

For men, penetrative sexual intercourse is the only kind of sex that we are really interested in. That is why things like getting and maintaining rock-hard erections and the size of our penises are a big deal to us. Managing to complete a full session of sexual-intercourse with a woman is the ultimate confirmation of our manhood and vitality. Sex does wonders for our confidence, egos and our general psyche. Maybe that’s the reason why our minds are occupied by sexual thoughts throughout the day all day. We depend on sex for so much.

However, nearly all men go through periods whereby they cannot get it up when they are most required to. Such an experience can be devastating and it can really crush a man’s ego. It is said that most women are quite understanding and forgiving whenever their sexual partners can not get or maintain an erection. After all, what most women are interested in is not the actual sex act but the cuddling and bonding that usually comes with it. Well, that is hardly a consolation to a male who cannot get it up. Besides, I doubt that there is much truth in that. Women want to have sex just as much as men.

Anyway so what is a man to do when he discovers in horror that no matter how much he tries, he just won’t get it up sufficiently for sex? The first thing to do is: Do not panic! You will only make it worse. What you need to be doing is to relax and focus as much as possible on getting sexually aroused. An erection occurs when blood is pumped into the penis and stays there, making it hard. It generally happens because a guy is thinking about sex, or because his penis is being stimulated – or both. This is why you need to concentrate as much as possible on getting sexually aroused. Get your lover to try and physically stimulate you. You know what turns you on. If you and your lover do not know how to physically turn you on, then perhaps you ought to go back to the basics of foreplay and a pleasurable journey of self-discovery. If this still does not work, then it’s a perfect excuse to bring out your collection of adult movies to act as a sex aid.

If this doesn’t work, well there is not much left that you can do. Perhaps you can try again later. However, if you are persistently failing to get or maintain an erection most times that you try to have sex, you are probably suffering from erectile dysfunction. Erectile Dysfunction or Impotence is the failure to get an erection, or keep an erection long enough for satisfactory sexual intercourse. Stress, problems at work, relationship difficulties or financial worries in a relationship, boredom, tension, anger, anxiety about poor sexual performance and sexually transmitted diseases and lack of intimacy and communication can all trigger possible impotence. However, only one in ten cases of impotence are caused by psychological factors. Most Erectile Dysfunction problems are caused by physical illness. For example, diabetes and neurological problems. And the good news is that most can also be treated. That is why it is important to consult with a doctor when impotence increasingly disrupts your sex life.

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  1. Gary

    On January 22, 2008 at 12:21 pm


    Yeah, when a guy can’t get it up then he will most likely do something about it. If ED is caused by some serious health problems then treatment of such illnesses becomes the solution, along with dietary changes. If that doesn’t help to revive strong or healthy erections, Viagra isn’t always the answer. The risk of side effects is highly probable. But then again there are natural remedies that promote healthy libidos, stimulate hormone production as well as treat circulatory problems triggering impotence. These herbal remedies are concocted with the extracts of potent herbs such as the Siberian Ginseng and Sarsapilla. So why not just give it a try?

  2. scared to death

    On December 24, 2008 at 7:47 am


    I’ve always been ready for sex. But lately Mr. Peters isn’t showing up for work. I will try anything at this point.I am not married,but divorced, and have not yet spent the night with my girl due to circumstances with the kids. Both of us have children and are needed at home.Our time together due to our schedules is always scheduled and we get together for only an hour or two at a time. It’s been like that for around four years now, but we are going to fix that in 2009. I have tried enzyte for the last two weeks, however I haven’t seen any results that would (excite) me. Yes the little pill works, but I don’t want to be hooked on those, and besides that the doctor only gives out 4 a month. I got them just for fun, but now??? I do believe its all in the mind and sure wish I knew how to regain my confidence in the sack!!!!!!!!1

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