The Chinese Virgin Complex

Until I met my husband in England, I didn’t realize there is a universal attitude towards a virgin. I remember him telling me that he respected me and my family more and took me even more seriously, because it showed that I am a self-respected, highly disciplined girl from a very respectable family. Perhaps no sex before marriage shows that you are very serious about your personal relationship, and disciplined enough to reserve the most intimate behavior for your future husband. But I think that whether an individual decides to be a virgin or not before getting married should be a personal choice rather than a pressure from society, a pressure coming from a highly conservative and defined culture. However, a culture which tries too hard to protect itself from loosing its purity, by staying within its own restricted boundaries, will eventually loose the drive to push itself beyond the boundary and stretch its ability. And as a consequence, it will also loose the opportunity to be redefined as a richer, more profound, and splendid culture, and one which would also enrich its own people’s lives.