Anger and Culture

Different cultures, different behavioral codes. Often they also deal with emotions differently than we are used to.
The Dutch, Italians and the Koreans e.g., handle anger, the
strongest of all human emotions, in their own, cultural defined way.

Multi-cultural societies

The country and culture we are borne in, defines the way we view, mirror and interpret other people’s thoughts, feelings and behaviors.

Standards which we perceive as “the norm”, we have learned from our subculture – the extended family.

The West, with countries that become more and more multi-cultural, has to deal with these different norms. This often leads to clashes with the minority population that wants to hold on to their own standards.

Different codes of behavior

While on holiday abroad, we often encounter different standards of behavior, which (to us) seem strange or even weird.

In order not to offend people they have to live, work and do business with, embassy personnel and businessmen have to study the behavioral codes of these countries beforehand.

When you give a strong (Western) handshake to an Indonesian man, you offend him. Being calm and subtle is of great importance, and you have to speak softly, without anger or aggressiveness. Such is the rule in Indonesia. This same behavior in the West will make you a “sissy”.

No show

To our Western eyes, people from Asian countries especially, always seem polite. We never see them angry.

The reason is that in these cultures you are not allowed to show your anger. Peace and harmony in the family must be kept at all cost, in order not to jeopardize social relationships.

Anger is suppressed, pent up and accumulated.

People describe this feeling like a “dense mass pushing up in the chest”.

Behind the polite smile, often lies what the Koreans describe as “fire”.

The suppressed emotions develop into a symptom called

“Wool-hwa-byung” – dense, thick or pent-up.

People are often aware they suffer from this syndrome, and describe it as having hurtful experiences, feelings of damage, like they are “boiling”, and as if they have “exploding” sensations inside their chest or body.

Inward and outward directed anger

Many Asian people experience anger in a passive way; they direct it inward, instead of outward. Hwa-byung is a syndrome of repressed anger that develops into somatic problems.

In the West we are more acquainted with the so-called “Ataque de nervios” (nervous breakdown), which is an episodic expression of anger as a result of having to put up with a build-up of anger over time.

Shouting is not “nice”

Western societies in general still have (unwritten) behavioral codes in which angry shouting matches are not “nice”.