Bragging Rights

Have you ever met the parent who constantly brags on their child’s accomplishments? How about the husband who’s continuously patting himself on the back for the nice things he does for his wife? Being in the company of these types of attention seekers can often become annoying, but have you ever wondered why they do the things they do?  What is with the incessant need to let others know how smart or well behaved their child is or how wonderful they are to their mate?

In many cases, parents are proud of their children for standing out amongst their peers. They call on closest friends to share the good news, hoping others will feel the same pride and rejoice with them through conversation, if nothing more. I think this is a normal reaction that most parents have toward their children. On other occasions, however, the parent may be looking for something more. Do some parents seek validation for doing a good job with their children? Is bragging a way for the parent to paint a picture of the child’s character?

What about the spouse who finds a need to discuss his good deeds toward his wife every chance he gets? Some husbands feel proud when his wife’s friends can compliment him and say what a great man he is. In other instances, the husband may feel that the act of kindness toward his wife was huge and out of the ordinary so he feels proud of the way in which he is able to show his love for her. Maybe the husband feels underappreciated by his spouse for never recognizing him for the kind ways in which he expresses his love or is he looking for something more? Is he trying to convince others he is a good man by constantly bragging about his actions or is he saying it over and over again in order to convince himself?

When people brag, it’s usually a cry for attention. They feel the need to remind those around them of how great they are, hoping the responses will provide a sense of security and validation. Insecure parents will often brag about the accomplishments of their children. A husband who is insecure may brag endlessly about the awesome things he does for his wife. Listeners tend to find this behavior rather annoying and eventually begin shying away or avoiding conversations that could lead to opportunities for the other party to begin tooting their own horns.