Etiquette – Its Disappearing Act

According to Wikipedia, “etiquette is the code that governs the expectations of social behavior.” In other words, it is the norms that restrict the way people interact with each other and show respect for one another. There are certain forms of etiquette that are ethnographic and ethnocentric. What one culture finds to be a display of politeness would shock another.

Some say that etiquette restricts personal freedom and expression, while others would say that those people are rude and barbaric. This is because one of the greatest misconceptions about etiquette is that it is exclusively for the wealthy and is used to determine class, and to separate the “cultured” from the “uncultured”. However, rules of etiquette apply to everyone because they are based around basic common sense. It may be that because of this misconception, North Americans are shying away from practicing “good manners”.

An old lady, holding bags of groceries, gets onto a semi crowded bus. The polite thing to do, if you can, is offer your seat to her. This is etiquette in North America. It is also the cultural norm in China, Italy and any other location where you might see a bus and an elderly person. This is common sense. Most of the rules of etiquette are based on common sense. They exist to help us maneuver through certain social situations. All cultures have a way to say please and thank you, and no culture tolerates abuse. The definition of etiquette does not mention perfection, class, or expensive frills. But confusing etiquette with this may be why North Americans are resisting proper etiquette.

Mistaking etiquette with being a snob has contributed to its slow demise. More and more adults are forgetting the basic rules of respect. Elderly people and pregnant women are standing on buses, people are cutting off each other in traffic and inappropriate comments are being said with little or no thought.

If adults can not practice these simple gestures then children will grow up without proper role models and ethics. Common sense is not so common anymore. North America is considered to be one of the most polite places. People in Canada have always been thought of as well mannered and respectful. It is shameful to think that a country that has this reputation is beginning to forget the “dos” and “don’ts” of etiquette.

We all know right from wrong. To say that etiquette is about frills, was created for the wealthy, and should be practiced by women as a way to be feminine is just an excuse to disregard the moral obligation that all of us have towards one another. Etiquette is generally based on fundamentals and common sense and should be practiced by everyone all over the world because it makes North America and the world operate on much friendlier terms.