Understanding The Younger Generation (10 to 18)

Having evolved from cradle to Senior Citizen, I have seen many changes in the American lifestyle. Some would say I grew up in the “Beaver Cleaver” period where everything was nice, and everybody was nice, and things ran smoothly.

However, when I was a pre-teen and teenager the Korean war was ending and the war in Viet Nam was beginning. The practice of drafting our young men into service was coming to an end, and people were openly against the war in Viet Nam. There was a lot of unrest on college campuses all around the country. And this was the beginning of one of the biggest changes that would take place in the way our younger generations would be raised.

We had our “hippy” generation, our “beatnik” generation, college kids were into PCP, and pot was becoming the drug of choice. As they said, “Make love, not war!”

Our music changed and rock concerts swept the country where much was played up in the media regarding the “love-ins”, and “stoned performers” who were influencing our kids. But, I think the kids were just busting out of their sheltered existence and were encouraging the performers to cater to their lifestyle of drugs and sex and willingness to “walk on the wild side”. It was a combined effort to shock those over the age of 30.

Why is all of that any different than the “Charleston” generation, or the jitterbug generation? There was some shock at women when they began to smoke cigarettes in public. There was music of which the older generations didn’t approve. Why did the “50s and “60s change things so completely?

I think perhaps this new wave of bra burning, pot smoking, free love generation just sent parents over the edge. This is about the time that parents gave up on encouraging their daughters to be dainty, quiet, and nurturing little girls and began telling them they could do or become anything they desired. There were no lines drawn between male-female capabilities. Everyone was out to get what they wanted, and women’s liberation was born. This all had a dual effect on how our lifestyle would change. Some changes were way overdue, others have brought problems we never anticipated.

When we pushed our daughters into a competitive mode, we neglected to reinforce the graciousness that would enhance their social lives. Our sons began to overlook the fact that these were girls and began treating them as one of the guys. The boys took it to extremes by setting aside all the gentlemanly courtesies in favor of, “If they want to act like guys, let’s treat them as guys.”

In addition, we also neglected to impress on our sons that regardless of the advances girls made, they were still girls and deserved to be treated as such.

Time marches on and we don’t think about all of this much anymore. We just wonder where things went so crazy with our children. We wonder why they have so much stress in their lives when they should be carefree and enjoying their childhood.

We wonder why so many kids have ADD and ADHD, and how so many of them have become bi-polar. There are so many things bothering our kids today it is almost impossible to isolate any individual cause. Everyone wants to place blame on things like T.V. or spending unmonitored time on their computer. Some blame it on peer pressure or their obsession with celebrity worship. But, I believe these things are minor influences. I believe, as parents, we overlook the one influence, the major influence, in our children’s lives. That influence is us.