It is not enough knowing how to construct your English sentences. English is a highly polite and polished language. You must know how to use it while conversing with others; how not to offend them, how to be courteous and sweet mannered and make yourself lovable etc. If you want to develop a team of friends and well wishers, your standard of English conversation must be of the highest order.

In this article, I have taken 8 particular situations and have given you the details of conversations in each along with explanatory notes. Hope you will not only enjoy reading the contents but also follow the methods used by the participants. Good luck.

Situation 1 – Meeting an old friend after a week or so at a common place.

Paul: Hi, Ahmed, good morning, how are you?

Ahmed: Am fine. How are you, friend?

Paul: Nothing to complain, Ahmed. God has been kind to me. Have no problem

whatever.

Ahm: How is your preparation going on? Our Public exam is only a fortnight away,

you see?

Paul: I know. Am getting a little nervous as the D day approaches.

Ahm: What’s there to be nervous about, old chap? Be brave. Look at Kesav. That

fellow walks as if all his text books are on his palms. Hah, Hah.

Paul: I say, Kesav is a top guy. Actually, he could teach our teachers a thing or

two.But we are just average fellows.

Ahm : Don’t include me in your gang. I am in the top bracket, say, of the first 20.

Paul: Excellent. We are only 25 in the Matriculation class. You are in the 20th position

means, you are just one above me. Aren’t you?

Ahm: I know, I know. But I am not nervous like you. I’ll certainly get pass marks in

every subject.

Paul: Well, well. See you on the exam day.

Shall we analyse their sentences?

1.You always greet a well known person with a ‘hullo’ or ‘hi’ followed by the familiar greeting phrase, “good morning or good afternoon” etc. And the other must acknowledge it in a similar fashion. “How are you?” as a greeting is all right between friends or very familiar persons.

2. “Pal”, “old chap;” “guy” “gang” “friend” are all informal words used between friends. These words show some affection towards the other.

3.Have you seen that many sentences do not follow the S+A+V+O/C pattern. These are shortcuts and are permissible in conversations. Take the phrase “I know”. Here the O/C is missing or you can say that O/C has been silenced.” Be brave” is a short form of, “You do be brave”. “Look at Kesav” is a short form of “You do look at Kesav.” “OK” is also a short form of “It is all right”. “See you on the exam day” is a short form of “I shall see you on the exam day.”

4. Also take note that some of the sentences end with the S+A+V, you know, you see? You can view them as Complex sentences as well without a conjunction. But, in conversation, this is a nice method of ending a sentence with a good note. These phrases mean nothing at all except they sound well. You may also use them in your conversations. The usual phrases are, “you know, you see, see what I mean, OK, Right, I say, well”. Sometimes, you may also start a sentence with any of these phrases, especially with ‘well’.

5. Earlier we said that in a conversation we use normally one sentence at a time. Here, you find Ahmed and Paul have used up to 4 sentences. This is all right but they must be real short ones. If you use 4 long complex sentences, the other may feel lost and not follow your thoughts at all. Hence, the advice to use only one sentence at a time.

6. EQs are used not only as questions but also as powerful statements.

7. Here the participants could be two young maidens also.

Situation 2 – Tom bumps into a stranger of about the same age in a Public library area just at the entrance and there is nobody else. So, Tom finds that he has to say something or feels compelled to float a conversation.

Tom: Good morning. I am Tom Tom Jones. (Extends his right hand)

Prem: (Shaking hands with Tom) Good morning. I am Prem. Prem Kumar. How do you

do?

Tom: How do you do? I am new to this Library. Have you visited here before?

Prem. Yes. Several times. Where do you live Tom?

Tom: In Anna nagar. It’s in the opposite direction, you know?

Prem: Yes, I know. What are your interests Tom? What brings you here?

Tom: Well Prem, I have to write an essay on the Chola period, you see? Have come to

hunt for some material about those kings. And you?

Prem: Well, I come here to read some magazines. This Library keeps a lot of foreign

magazines., you see?

Tom : Good. Which school are you from, Prem?

Prem : I am in St John’s. Joined it for my +1 last month. And how about you?

Tom : I have just entered +2. I am a History student.

Analysis

1. Sometimes we may bump into someone or come across face to face with a stranger accidentally all at once. Some people would say ‘sorry’ and go about their job. Why? Why not start a conversation with the other? That would be a wonderful opportunity too, wouldn’t it? You must learn to meet people and talk with them. You now have the wherewithal to speak confidently. You never know you may learn something new from them. In fact, one young man got a job after colliding with a top industrialist, an elderly person, because he had impressed that gentleman with his high profile English !!

2. When such a chance comes about like in the case of Tom and Prem, greet the other with a warm Good morning or Good afternoon etc and with a charming smile. Rest assured that the other will respond with equal warmth. Never ask the other person, “What’s your name? Or Who are you?” etc. You give your own name first and it is an invitation for the other to reveal his name.

3.“How do you do?” is the correct form of greeting a stranger. And no other. The response for “How do you do” is again “How do you do?”. It may sound funny to you. But that’s the way it is. Similarly, if you are introduced to an unknown person, you also greet him/her with “How do you do?”

4. Notice the various shortcuts used by the speakers. “Several times” is equal to “I

have visited this Library several times.

5. After answering Prem’s question “What brings you here?’, Tom ends his part with “And you?” This is a short form for, “What have you come here for?” “In Anna nagar” is the O/C part and a short form for, “I live in ’Anna nagar.” “How about you?” is short form for “Where do you study?”

6.In the two examples above, you would notice that the conversation has picked up speed. Why? Because, one has thrown a question. If you don’t ask a question, the conversation will come to a dead end especially when you meet a new person. You must ask only questions of common or mutual interest and never any of personal nature.

Situation 3 – You see the opposite sex somewhere and you know that maiden, though you haven’t had a personal encounter with the other before. How to manage such a situation. Let’s see how Joe had gone about the job.

Joe: I believe we have seen each other quite a lot. In St Peter’s Matriculation school, I

mean.

Lady: …………

Joe : I am Joseph, Matriculation Section A. You are in Section C, I am sure.

Lady: ………

Joe: Come Sanjana. Don’t pretend you don’t know me. Good morning.

Sanj: Good morning. Where…. you…… going?

Joe: To Parry’s corner, naturally. And your good self?

Sanj: To Central station.

Joe : Going to receive someone?

Sanj : Yes, my Dad.

Joe: Your Dad, you said. Doesn’t he live with you here in Chennai?

Sanj: Yes, but, he had to go to New Delhi on duty, you see?

Joe: Oh, is that so? Well, the bus is on its way here. Shall we get in …?

Inside the bus

Joe: How have you done in the exam?

Sanj: Not bad. Will get through all right.

Joe: Don’t be so modest, Sanjana. I am sure you will get a State rank.

Sanj: Really? You will be the first one I shall inform, if it ever turns out to be true.

By the way , how have you done?

Joe: Not bad, you know? I am not a top student like you .. I mean… I am just

an average student.

Sanj: Oh, my stop has come. See you sometime. Bye

Analysis

1. It’s not good to look the other way when you sight a familiar face and especially at close quarters. Here, it is the Male who has to take the initiative. A Female will never be bold enough to pick up a conversation in India or for that matter in any country. Joe knows Sanjana by name and face but they have never talked with each other over the years.

2. Initially very shy, Sanjana has picked up speed. Sentences have started flowing out of her mouth. Why? Joe had been throwing questions at the other and encouraging her to come out of the shell. Remember that such questions must be of common interest.

3. When you pay compliments of any kind to the opposite sex, be very judicious; don’t overdo or otherwise it might be misunderstood and annoy the other.

4. “And your good self” is the short form of, “Where exactly are you going?” “Good self” is more honorable than the simple “you”. ‘Good self ‘ seems to be an Indian model and is an equivalent from an Indian language. It’s a good title to adopt by other countries as well. Similarly, “Your good name?” instead of “ Your name?’

Situation 4 – How to go about it when you encounter the opposite sex who is a total stranger? See, how Balan manages it.

The venue is Professor Sudarsan’s house. Two of his old students have decided to call on the professor one evening. Balan has entered first and is sitting comfortably on a chair while the professor is in his Study room. And IN walks an young lady about the same age as Balan.

Balan : ……….

Lady : ……….

Total silence in the Sitting room. After some 3 minutes of status quo Balan decides to break the ice.

Balan: Come to meet the professor?

Lady: (Very softly) Y – e – s.

Balan: Chennai has become very hot, hasn’t it?

Lady : …..h’m ….

Balan: Are you Professor Sudarsan’s student or something?

Lady : Yes. Ex-student.

Balan: Oh, what a coincidence? I am an ex-student of his too.

When were you in Presidency college?

Lady: Years back, you know?

Balan: English literature?

Lady: Of course. How did you guess?

Balan: Well, it’s your accent. See what I mean?

Lady: Don’t tell me my accent is all that great?

Balan: It is indeed. Many Tamilian students just can’t get rid of the Tamil slant in their

pronunciation.

Lady: I am sure, you are a Tamilian too. Correct or not?

Balan Well, it’s a secret….

At this stage the Professor enters in.

Prof: (Facing the lady) Hello, Mohana? When did you come?

Moha: Some 5 minutes back, Sir.

Prof: By the way, have you introduced yourself to each other?

Moha: Am afraid, No.

Prof: Well, Mohana, meet Balan, Balan Menon, Asst Manager in Harry & Co.

(Turning to Balan) Balan, she is Mohana Rajan. My ex student. She is

an MA Lit.

Balan: How do you do, Miss. Rajan?.

Moha: How do you do, Mr. Menon. Never guessed that you were a working person.

Analysis

1.Here is another situation where the Gent has to be the first to speak. Balan just couldn’t ignore the presence of a lady inside someone else’s sitting room. So, he throws a very innocuous question which just cannot be misinterpreted at all. If she was the Professor’s daughter, the lady would have just gone in. Whereas, she too took her seat in the room. So, Balan thinks that she is also a visitor like himself.

2. See the way Balan has phrased his first question. “Come to meet the Professor?” This is the short form of “Have ;you come to meet the Professor?” Framed in other ways like, “What have you come here for?” “What’s the purpose of your visit?” etc would indeed sound rude. Nor does he greet her. It would have looked awkward too to say, ‘good evening’ after such a gap of time. So, Balan skips it. He could have wished her immediately on her entry. In which case, the conversation would have taken a different angle altogether.

3.The lady doesn’t respond positively at all. Balan doesn’t leave the matter there. He is determined to make her talk. His next question is not only appropriate but also totally unoffensive. “Are you the Professor’s ex-student or something?” What’s this ‘something?’ This is another end phrase, that’s all. At this juncture, the lady gets interested and replies him with a positive note. Another trick Balan has followed is, “giving a compliment”. All of us like to be complimented over something or the other, such as, your dress, the family members, the school/college where we studied , our work place etc. Here again, don’t overdo it. Your compliment must be suitable to the occasion and completely acceptable to the other.

4. Have you also noticed that Balan doesn’t introduce himself to the lady? He waits for the Professor to do it. It would have been different had the visitor been a gentleman like himself.

5. When introduced, Balan addresses the other formally by her surname – Miss. Rajan.

Mohana also addressed him as Mr. Menon. Don’t ever use the first name on first introduction; use only the formal names.

6. “By the way” is another good opening phrase which means, “Incidentally.” Some people would say ,“By the by”. Wrong. This is a wrong phrase.

Situation 5 – James comes in contact with an elderly gentleman at the entrance to a cinema theatre.

James: (The sweep of the pedestal fan in the hall is very strong and suddenly you find your cinema ticket has flown off and is resting on a gentleman’s shoes a couple of meters away) Excuse me. Excuse me

Elderly Man: (The other person turns around to see who is calling him. He is an elderly gentleman, well dressed; appears to be over 50 years of age). Yes, may I be of any help, young man?

James: Yes, Sir. My cinema ticket is stuck on your shoes? May I trouble you a little, Sir?

Elderly : Oh I see? (He bends down, picks it up and shows it toward James)

James : (steps forwards and collects the ticket from the elderly man) Thank you, Sir. Thank you

very much.

Elderly: You are welcome, sonny. What you doing?

James: Just finished my Plus 2, Sir.

Elderly: What are your plans ahead? Engineer or Doctor?

James: Oh No, Sir. Neither. Intend going for a degree in Commerce.

Elderly: Good. Any qualification is good enough, you know? Study hard, work hard and you will

flourish in life.

James: Thank you, Sir. The gate has opened. Shall we get in, Sir?

Analysis

1.“Excuse me” is one method of attracting the attention of another person if that person is not looking in your direction. Never hail anyone, “Hullo?” or “Hey?” This is not only rude but completely uncouth as well.

2. The elderly gentleman is one who is tops in good manners. “May I be of any

help?” is much more honourable than saying, “What can I do for you?’

3.See, James also doesn’t say, “Please, pick up that ticket from your shoes..?” He

says, “May I trouble you …” and leaves the sentence half way without adding the words ? “…… could you please pick up my ticket?”

4.Then someone has done a favour for you, you must thank the other; thank heartily;. always use the phrase “Thank you or Thank you, Sir” and never “Thanks”.

5.The correct way of acknowledging a “Thank you” is, “You are welcome” and no other alternative.

6.After acknowledging with “You are welcome” the elderly gentleman adds the title “sonny”. This shows that the elder is very impressed with James’ s good manners and addresses him affectionately. James must take this as a compliment and talk to him respectfully.

7. When you meet an elderly person, address the other as “Sir” or “Madam”

8. See how many shortcuts each has made in the conversation: “What you doing?”

for “What are you doing?”

9. “What are your plans ahead?” “Engineer or Doctor” is for, “Are you going for

engineering or medicine?”

Situation 6 – A Telephone call between an youngster and an elderly person

(You are James and you wish to speak with your college friend Monty)

Tring … tring …

Other:Hello. (The voice is deep and resonant and you know that some elder is on the line and not Monty. The voice is possibly that of Monty’s Uncle/father)

You : (After a small gulp). Good morning, Sir. May I … May …I..

Other:Yes, what is it sonny?

You : Sorry, Sir. May I speak to Monty?

Other:Who are you young man?

You : I am James, Sir, Monty’s classmate.

Other: Oh. Good morning, James. Wait, I shall call him over.

Other: (After a gap of a minute or so) Here is James for you Monty. (And the elderly person hands over the handset to Monty)

Monty: Hi. James boy. Howdy?

James: Hey Monty. I got a shock a little earlier, yaar.

Monty:Why?

James :Was it your father or someone else?

Monty: My Uncle, He has come here from London for a few days. Why?

James: Oh nothing. I got a little shaken up when I heard an elderly voice on the receiver.

That’s all.

Monty:You weren’t rude to him, were you Jamesy boy?

James: Certainly not. I observed all the courtesies we had learnt in our English class. Did he say anything to you?

Monty: I think he was quite impressed with your telephone manners, because he gave me a big smile when he handed over the telephone to me.

James.: Thank you. Now, about our going to a movie ……..

Points

1.When you hear an elderly person’s voice on the line, be very cautious. It’s always good to address the elderly person ‘Sir’ or ‘Madam’. They will be impressed and would be most polite to you. Don’t ask him/her, “Who are you? What are you doing in my friend’s house? Are you Monty’s father or something?” Youngsters should not exceed their limit. Be courteous as James had done in this example.

2.”Howdy’ is a short form of “how do you do?” This is a typical language of college students. Similarly the word ‘yaar’. This is an Hindi word, actually. But it has become common all over India.

3.An elder can use the inquiry, “Who are you …?” And here the elder also adds” …young man”. It shows his affection for the caller. You may also say something like, “Who are you young sir?” And the little fellow at the end would feel thrilled and perhaps address you “sir”.

Situation 7 - Conversation between an young man and an young woman over the telephone

(You are Mahesh and you wish to speak with your friend Ramanan on telephone)

Tring… tring…

Other: Haloo.

(You come to know straightway that the voice is that of a woman. You can’t guess her age also. Possibly a college going maiden.)

Mahesh: Hm…. Er … hm.. Good morning, I wish to speak with Ramanan. Please.

Other: Oh Ramanan. He is my cousin. Could you please wait till he comes. I think he is in the toilet. Shall send a word across to him. May I know who is on the line?

Mahesh: Mahesh. Ramanan is my classmate, you see? Will he take long?

Other: Don’t know? I believe he spends quite a while when he goes in for a bath.

Mahesh: Does he also sing inside the bathroom?

Other:Yes, he does. That’s what Aunty tells me.

Mahesh:Well, I have known him as a ‘bathroom singer’. Hah.. hah.

Other: Ha..ha..

Mahesh:You didn’t tell me… tell me…. your name..

Other: I am Shalini. Ramanan’s cousin sister.

Mahesh: Are you on a visit to Chennai?

Shalini: Yes, I am. I am actually from Pune.

Mahesh: Oh Pune? It’s quite far from Chennai, isn’t it?

Shalini:Yes, it is. But it’s just some 24 hours away.

Mahesh:What you doing,…. …. Miss Shalini? You won’t mind me asking that personal

question.

Shalini: Oh not at all. I am in my final year BA Psychology in Wadia college.

Mahesh:Oh, how nice. Ramanan and I are in second year. I am sure Ramanan would have told you.

Shalini: No, I am afraid not. I arrived just last evening.

Ah, here is Ramanan. He is still wiping his head with his towel. Talk to him. Bye.

Mahesh:Bye. Nice talking with you Miss. Shalini.

Ramanan:Hi, Mahesh. How are you?

Points

1.See how dignified Mahesh is when he is talking with a lady. Some young men treat young women as dirt. Wrong. Treat everyone with respect. And don’t take undue liberty also with the fair sex. For instance, you can’t ask any personal questions about the other like, how old are you, do you like movies, what is your pastime activity etc. Here, when Mahesh enquires with a sentence, “What you doing Miss Shalini” he also gives his apology. True, this is not a very offensive question. Yet, it amounts to a personal question.

2.Mahesh addresses the lady as Miss. Shalini. This is the correct way. Don’t take any liberty with strangers. Be very formal always in the beginning.

3.Some telephone users have a bad habit of saying, “please wait” and vanish away. This is wrong. Any waiting time on a telephone should be just a few seconds. If the caller has to wait for a longer time, always suggest that the other ring back or you would ask Ramanan to ring the caller back.

4.See how Mahesh has framed his question – You didn’t tell me your name. This is a very polite sentence, isn’t it? To ask, “May I know who you are” or “May I know with whom I am talking” etc at this late stage would have sounded odd. Hence a novel way.

5.Even if the person at the other end is a small girl or boy, you must talk with much courtesy and politeness. Never be bossy. All your character and school/college learning would become obvious to the other by the way you conduct yourself on a telephone.

Situation 8 – Conversation between two unknown school students of different sex

This is a scene in a college premises where a number of students have gone in hoping for a seat in Arts or Science groups. Both sexes are present. James is from a first rate English medium school where he had finished his +2. He is keen on taking Maths, Physics, Chemistry and Computer science group. No one seems to know each other since all are from different High schools. James feels that he needs to meet some students and shouldn’t’ stand idle ignoring the presence of other students especially the lady students. Let’s see how James manages the situation.

James (addresses a lady student) :Good morning, I am sure, you have come for admission like me. Right?

Girl: …………. Y– e —- s

James : You must be from a Convent school. Am I right or not?

Girl : Indeed, I am. How did you guess?

James: Well. First, you are very smart; standing upright and looking straight. And of course you have a charming face.

Girl : What else?

James: While all the other girls are in Salwar Kameez, you are in a saree. A saree suits you very well.

Girl : OK. I am Sheila. I am from St. Philomena’s convent.

James: Isn’t it wonderful? I am James, James Vasanthan. I am from St. Paul’s Matriculation and Higher secondary school.

Sheila: Oh, St Paul’s from, Madhavaram?

James : Yes.

Points

1.Sheila is initially a very shy and cold girl as well. Most girls are so in India and in most of the developing countries as well possibly. A sentence such as “You must be from a convent…” has energized her. All of us are proud of our work place, school/college, residence etc. And we love to talk about it. So, Sheila livens up immediately. And to keep the conversation going, James gives another compliment about her personality. Won’t all of us love to hear something good about our looks, intelligence, dress etc? And here, Sheila wants to hear more accolades and says “what else?” See the way James praises her – all subdued and nothing loud at all. One could overstep here. Don’t. Too much flattering may back fire. Sheila is naturally impressed with the young man and she volunteers more information about herself. Imagine a girl revealing her name to a stranger. At this stage, James has won her over.

2. With the same sex , follow the same method. Praise the other in modest terms and he will begin to talk. Further, throw a question at him and that’s the way to keep a conversation going. Don’t say anything personal. For instance any question such as, “How many sister have you, are they all grown up, married?” etc. All questions and compliments must be most modest and innocuous.

3. So, next time you come across a fair sex, don’t run way. Hang on and start a conversation. And you know the trick of how to get it going.

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