Types of People in Social Interactions
by As we all know, there are people in life we enjoy being around, who make us feel good about ourselves, and often go out of their way for our benefit; and that we do not enjoy being around and who always seem to find a way to ‘bring us down.’ This article will discuss the four types of people involved in social interactions, as defined by some presentations I’ve attended, as well as how best to deal with those that do not have positive effects in your life.
Adders
These people add joy to your life and are usually around to help you when you need them. They want you to be happy and – though they may not be there just to be your ‘benefactor’ – they genuinely care for your well-being. These people may be good friends, teachers, parents, relatives, etc. Adders add positively to your life, and it is a good idea to keep them in it. It is also a good idea to try to be an adder in your own social interactions, because these are the people other people want to/enjoy being around and think kindly of.
Subtractors
These people are often taking joy out of your life, and though they may be around in times of trouble, their goal is usually not to help you. Their main goal is to achieve their own happiness, usually at the expense of yours, and are often jealous of what you have (accomplishments, friends, material goods, etc.). These people may be ‘friends’ (or ‘frienemies/essentially an enemy), enemies, coworkers, sometimes family, significant others, competitors, etc. Beware of interacting with sub-tractors because they are negative factors in your life and cause much grief. If there is no way to avoid them, tread carefully and do not trust them with important information that could be used against you. You should avoid being a sub-tractor in others’ lives.
Multipliers
These people multiply the positives in your life, and are determined to help you succeed. They usually want to teach you how to help yourself/ reach your goals (as with the philosophy that if you give a man a fish, he’ll eat for a day, but if you teach him how to fish, he’ll never go hungry again), and are often experts in a particular field. Their main goal in life is to help other people and to spread happiness, and they are usually pretty high on the social/political scale because of their efforts. Their time is highly valued, and they may be difficult to reach, but once you come to their attention – if they see that they can help you help yourself – they will help you multiply the good in your life many times. These people may be college professors, office-holders, significant others, mentors, etc. You should show your gratitude and appreciation to the multipliers in your life, do your best to pass on the favors they have given you in your interactions with others, and to work hard at learning and applying what they have taught you.
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