Types of People in Social Interactions
by As we all know, there are people in life we enjoy being around, who make us feel good about ourselves, and often go out of their way for our benefit; and that we do not enjoy being around and who always seem to find a way to ‘bring us down.’ This article will discuss the four types of people involved in social interactions, as defined by some presentations I’ve attended, as well as how best to deal with those that do not have positive effects in your life.
Dividers
These people seek to separate you from the good in your life, and usually from the positive people in your life also. Jealousy plays a huge factor in their interactions: they’d rather have you to themselves than to share you with others, and will often try to separate you from everyone else. Their main goal in life is seeking their own happiness at the expense of whoever else may be around, and they often destroy people’s social lives when seeking that end. These people often purposely cause arguments/fights, lie, cheat, steal, etc. Some examples may be significant others, bosses, coworkers, enemies, frienemies (essentially an enemy, especially one who’s really jealous), etc. You should do your best to avoid them, and – if that’s not possible – be polite and kind but give them no useful information against you and stand up for yourself when they say/do things that may harm you. Avoid being a divider in your own social interactions.
A person is not permanently a member of one of these categories – far from it. First of all, change is always possible, and you can help yourself and others by recognizing where you and others stand in these categories and acting according to where you want to be ‘placed.’ Second, people take on different roles when around different people or when in different situations. In one case, a person may be an adder, but in another could be a multiplier, and – in still another – could be a sub-tractor. It is important to recognize which category you fall into in different situations, and to monitor that according to the person you want to be. It is highly important that you think of your interactions with friends, realize who is a positive or negative addition to your life, and act accordingly. Spend more time with those who are positive additions to your life – it’s usually safe to be close with them – and beware of the negatives. Sometimes it may help to talk about the problem of negativity with the negatives in your life – talk about how they are subtracting positivity from your life and what you would rather them do (adding positivity) instead if you want to be friends. Above all, in all of your own interactions, seek to be one of the positive people – adding positivity to others’ lives – and be kind to everyone.
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