The New Yogis Resolution

If these new students stick with me, they will discover all of this. But alas, I must admit that by the last week of January, early February, those gleaming new yoga mats are put away and I never see some of these fine folk again. I go back to teach my classes to my regular persons, whom I love very much. Don’t get me wrong; newbies wander in all year long, (we cannot forget about the late spring “I heard yoga can make me look like Carmen Electra in my bathing suit” students). But the fresh young faces that the New Year drags in, they hold a special place in my heart.

Perhaps these fine citizens of DC are not yet ready to just let themselves take the journey into the unknown. To many of us, the idea of giving up our addiction to bettering ourselves is a petrifying one. What would happen if we for just a while stopped trying to be better than the next guy, what if we accepted ourselves as we are in this moment? A scary thought, indeed.

So, you have your shiny new yoga mat and you are fearlessly going to that yoga class, come hell or high water. Here’s a list of what you can expect, and what I pray you will never ever do:

1. No shoes, no socks. No one cares that you have ugly feet. Honestly. You’ll be OK.
2. You must tell the teacher you’ve never done yoga before and you absolutely must tell the teacher if you are pregnant, have back/knee/shoulder issues, if you’ve had any car accidents or surgeries…. Basically it is a grand idea to tell him/her more that you think you should.
3. You’re going to be watching and listening to your breath a whole lot. You may have never done this before. Start now, practice. What parts of your body are affected as you breathe? You’ll get used to it.
4. Wear something that you can move in. And do not wear a huge t-shirt. You’ll be going upside-down and the shirt will fall in your face. If you happen to be male, realize that you may be opening your legs wide. Something tight and concealing under the workout shorts is a fantastic addition to your yoga attire.
5. Make it work for you!! I cannot stress this enough. Yoga class is not supposed to be for a room full of cookie cutters. If you cannot do something, then modify it for yourself. The teacher may or may not give you alternatives. Listen to your body.
6. Try not to come to class with lots of smelly stuff on your skin.
7. Some teachers will speak in Sanskrit and you may have no idea what he/she is talking about. That’s fine; you are not expected to know Sanskrit. Just follow as best you can.
8. Please do not come into class late. Most teachers use the first few minutes of class to set the mood and calm the minds of the students. If you enter right in the midst of that, you’ll feel like an idiot.
9. ENJOY SAVASANA. What? The last pose in class is called savasana. In Sanskrit this means “corpse pose”. I cannot tell you how awful it is to watch people fidget and keep stretching and deny themselves the awesome pleasure of being totally still and doing absolutely nothing for 5 minutes. Enjoy it. If it’s uncomfortable to be still with you, keep coming back.