Defined as the replicated public, spoken, emotional or even actual physical misuse by an company, perform environment mistreatment can be began by a administrator or associate in the perform environment. This form of violence at perform can happen to anyone in any form of career scenario. Even volunteers, learners and interns can be influenced. These activities are generally designed to embarrass or lower the focus on of such misuse and regularly challenge an worker’s right to pride at perform.

How to Recognize Workplace Mistreatment

This form of perform environment misuse can take on many different varieties. The main identifier is an on-going design of unsafe habits. Some illustrations might involve the following:

Vague liability without actual support

Unreasonable criticism

Exclusion, solitude or marginalization

Being handled diversely from co-workers

Excessive tracking or micro-management

Being presented to a more strict conventional than those in your work-group

Who is Engaged in Intimidation in the Workplace?

Basically, anyone can become a criminal of this kind of perform environment misuse. The violent conduct of perform environment violence can be began and/or perpetrated by anyone in the perform environment. Often, a violence sufferer is at first focused by professionals or professionals and then co-workers may adhere to in order to stay in the good graces of control. Worry of being the next focus on can also are likely linked to associate violence. In any case, perform environment violence is incorrect and in some situations, can be unlawful and/or legal conduct.

How to Recognize Symptoms and symptoms of Business Abuse

Victims of corporate mistreatment may answer in different ways. Almost anyone can find the personality indication of corporate level personnel misuse. Offended workers may present many signs that are uncommon or rapid. Such signs may include:

An improve in absences or tired days

A rapid development of disciplinary actions

Failure to satisfy perform environment goals

Repeated needs for transfers

A significant change in morale

Everyone has a liability to review noticed misuse in the perform environment. Enduring or neglecting a associate being cajolled only results in the problem. Becoming a member of in on the focusing on, in some situations, can be unlawful and sometimes, may even be against the law. Workplace misuse must be taken seriously before it gets worse and becomes a protection concern.

However she had a really bad sexual experience at 12, when her 18 year-old brother grabbed her breasts, leered at her young body all the time. Not only that but he actually made her into sexual touching situations with him four times before the poor tearfully told her mother of this horror, who promptly put a stop to the young man’s behaviour, though naturally too late.

The poor girl found out art this time that her father, like most Pakistani men, hated having an unwanted daughter,  only wanting baby boys.  This left her feeling useless and unwanted, but she had behaved herself  before this bombshell dropped, after which she promised herself not  to  be good anymore and started to socialize with bad company in the shape of other girls and  guys always talking about sex. A classmate told her that she should date one guy in particular.

She  was 15 and  went to his home, where they smooched very sensually and provocatively without actually having intercourse, after which the girl went home and wept about why she had behaved that way, deciding to curb such behaviour, but sexual desires woke up again within her and she was soon seducing her long distance cousin, then a guy in her class, but she was making a name for herself that certainly did not want or need at her age.

This unfortunate girl never made even one childhood friend, and she often cried bitter tears because she truly wanted at least one true one, but never managed it. She found her class-mates bitchy, mean and nasty because their encouragement was what led her to behave badly in the first place, as she sees it.  These same peer people threatened to tell all to her mother, and her 21 year-old paternal uncle started to black mail her.

Telling her he knew her secrets, he promised he would help the girl if she would be nice to him, beginning to kiss not just her mouth but her whole body, grabbing her breast and forcing himself upon her.  She cried a great deal, but her feelings of worthlessness got worse, because she was convinced her parents regarded her not as a blessing but a burden, being a girl, and she sought sexual solace in the incestuous arms of her brother – and sleeping with a long-distance cousin, despite not knowing him at all.

She let herself become the bad girl to the extent that even her mother was calling her a whore. Men all say that she is just bad without knowing her real story at all, and she believes that all that ever happens is that people take what they want from her then toss her to one side like so much garbage, enjoying the knowledge of how much they are hurting her. She has no love in her life, so spends all her time weeping and writing poetry that she posts on triond.

All this truly unfortunate girl ever wants is to be loved, but her heart is a dead thing, so her writing is
her way of spitting out the venom within her and getting relief, hoping one day to find love. Right now she mainly feels both numb and dumb, not enjoying her studies, or wanting to I go outside of her home to avoid having to converse with other people. She has always had too great a tendency to
trust every one, but having been hurt so often by those she trusted, she these days takes some perverse pleasure from the pain, which is no longer as bad as it once was.

Her truly awful luck continued in 2011, when she met a Pakistani guy online who was studyng  in Birmingham ,UK, to whom she made a full confession, and was amazed to hear that he was prepared to come over to marry her, take her back and make her happy. He promised not to let her cry alone and that they could chat all the time   It turned out of course that his real interest was nothing more than sex-chat, which the girl eventually worked out for herself.

This poor girl says she has now had thousand of guys in her life – an exaggeration of course – who all seemed to loved her body but nothing more, nobody ever loving her for the person that she is. She went through that phase of loving parties, meeting new people, taking trips, and eating out a lot, but now she hates everything, even herself and her body, loving her heart and feeling so guilty for having broken it and destroyed all feelings.

She has a million reasons to cry, at one point suffering from dehydration problems because she  left her meals and even avoided liquids, crying and sobbing, skipping  meals and I getting sick, though happily she is now on the mend, slowly getting a little better. She was so depressed at one stage that she seriously considered suicide but, thankfully her religion forbids such actions.  She has now embraced her god, whom she worships and prays to for forgiveness.

This talented girl young female poet and her sad story should not be any reason for her to be consigned to the rubbish heap of life just because she made mistakes.  She deserves some happiness and to find one day that someone genuinely  loves her for herself me and will marry her, giving her the secure future she surely deserves.  

Sometimes bullying results from people thinking that the victim doesn’t mind being bullied or teased. If you are a victim, make sure that you let them know the FIRST TIME that it isn’t funny and they should stop. 

2. Control your emotions…at least in front of the ones who are hurting you

A vital aspect to dealing with bullying is to make sure that you have enough self control. When you are bullied and you have the urge to cry or even worse, jump around while flapping your arms like Donald Duck, don’t. This will signal to the bully that you are easily harmed and will wrosen the situation. The best thing to do is to pretend that it doesn’t affect you, and then release your negativity while alone. Remember, do not release it on someone else because then you will be..

3. Do not sink to their level

I know some victims of bullying that are so severely harmed – they resort to being horrible to others to let off their negative vibe. To make things worse, they think that they can justify that because they are being treated the same way. I’ve been there before, too, and trust me it does not work. It will make you hate yourself and will possibly turn your loved ones..the ones that you can go for help..away. In short, do not bully others because you are being bullied. 

4. Speak out to a friend

Sometimes bullying is an issue that you do not want to share with your parents. It is strongly recommended that you do but if you really don’t want to then make sure that SOMEONE YOU CAN TRUST knows. They may be able to provide the mental support that you desperately need and may even help you take the last step…

5. Tell an adult

I know, I know. Everyone tells you to do this but sometimes you don’t. Why? Because it can certainly be uncomfortable. However it is vital that you do, and I cannot stress this fact enough. I was recently a victim of severe prejudice and discrimination, and telling an adult made miraculous changes. I felt safe again, and I recieved so much support. People backed off and now I’m much happier. Whatever the cause of bullying is, whether it is your sexual orientation, your fashion sense, your dreams and ambitions, or even just because you’re different, you have to let an adult know. If you’re uncomfortable talking to your parents, that’s ok. There are lots of help organizations out there and you can also go to your school. Trust me. Once you take this step you will feel alot more secure. That’s a promise. 

6. Rebuild yourself

Sometimes bullying can damage a person so badly that they will be left in ruins. The most important thing to do at this point is to start rebuilding yourself. Start socializing with more people, engaging in new hobbies, or even starting to follow a new tv show. Remember, rebuilding yourself is extremely important and will make a you a stronger person.

7. Get back that self esteem and confidence!

Last but not least, it is important to know that being bullied is not your fault, nor will it ever be. Self esteem and confidence are vital attributes that make up a person, and hating yourself because other people are being horrible to you just does not help. It may even lead to suicide attempts, which will not only harm you but also the people that love you. This is a long process and takes a lot of determination. Listen to some sad songs that will make you cry, and then immediately switch to upbeat anthems about being strong, such as “Born This Way” by Lady Gaga or “Stronger” by Kelly Clarkson. Remember that no matter what, you have people on your side.

And remember..

If you ever come across someone being bullied, don’t just stand there. It will create a bad impression of you in that person’s mind because they will assume that you agree with the people who are harassing you which is not true. Stand up for others, and others will do the same for you.

Good luck, and act today!

Valentines Day can also be a hurtful time for some. Many can be confronting a cheating partner. The arguments to work late or get away from home that day. The phone with lock codes or left in the cars so you can’t see calls or messages. The I am hanging with friends that day. Anything to be away on the day that is nationally known to be with the one you love.

So a person has to face reality. They have to decide do they face reality or continue to live a lie. Do they pretend to be happy or fight for the relationship.

Only you and your partner can decide that. Maybe if this is you, it is time to sit down and be real with them. If you are cheating ask yourself why are you doing it. Do you need someone else to validate your worth? Is your partner not enough? Are you not happy with them? Maybe you should leave. Maybe you should be grownup enough to talk to them and tell them what it is. It isn’t fair to let another person think everything is okay while living a lie. It is pure selfishness.

If you are being cheated on you have to decide if that what you are willing to live with for the rest of your life. You have to decide if you deserve more or are you ok with living a lie. You also have to look at the health part. Are you ok with the fact they they may not be using safe sex? Are you ok with the fact that you maybe putting your own life at risk? Are you able to ask them and believe them? Could you believe someone that is already violating the vows?

You have to decide whether to fight for your relationship. People do make mistakes and maybe people change. Most never do.

But you are the one that has to live with the decision no one else. 

But remember, If you want things to change you have to do things different. Things cant remain the same. Both people have to do things differently. One person can’t make a relationship work it takes TWO.

It is what makes TWO people make it. A relationship does not consist of one person. Actions speak louder than words!!!

It feels wrong to leave since he or she is a good provider and has never hit them and seems to work hard for them.  Yet never misses a chance to put them down.  If they are married, he or she would never consider divorce, it was not in their vocabulary and divorce lawyers are expensive and can draw out a painful process even further.  They simply do not know where to start so they profess it is easier to keep things the way they are.  At least the uncertainty in life is predictable.

The good news is no longer do you have to put off the option of divorce or simply leaving if you are not married.  You do have reason(s) to leave and they are valid and biblical.  One good place to start is with a pastor outside your church and explain the situation.  I say this because pastors inside your own church may be biased towards your spouse or towards following the rules of the church over your own safety.  You could be blessed with a counselor that was a former pastor, too or has a background in biblical counseling or theology.  Ask around or go to a christian counseling agency, they are out there.

If you need counseling and guidance immediately and are on a tight budget, consider a shelter.  The actual services may be mainly geared towards women but they have resources available for men also, even if it is not right at the shelter.  There are groups available and individual counselors.  Call 2-1-1 or look in the yellow pages.

Other wonderful, helpful resource is divorcecare: www.divorcecare.org.  Whether you attend a group or not (you do not have to be divorced and can be anywhere in the process), sign up for the 365 free, daily emails you will receive.  You may meet some strong individuals that can help you through this uncertain time and they can connect you to many different resources.  This group has a purpose and a definite goal each week.  Participants are encouraged to share but are also limited to the topic of the day.  Even with friends to talk to, this group can provide valuable strength and insight from those that have been there.  It is strictly a support group, not a social group.

Take up a hobby that will give you strength, preferably some sort of physical activity, even self defense.  This will be very empowering.  If you are on a budget, consider parks & recreation department classes or rent a kickboxing DVD to see if you like it.  Anything along those lines will do.  If you are creative, join a singing or musical group or take a painting class.

Now that you have completed some of the work above, it’s time to do some homework.  Call some divorce lawyers in the area and take advantage of free time over the phone or in person.  Interview several and do not retain an attorney just because someone else recommends them.  All divorce proceedings are unique and they may not be able to help you the way they did your friend. 

Furthermore, it may be best to retain a hybrid type lawyer who will let you do most of the leg work yourself and help you with forms.  You may be sitting alone in court, but this is a good thing considering most lawyers are billable by the hour and court nearly always starts late. 

If your divorce may be contentious, then unfortunately the hybrid option may be out.  But do consider going this route.   Trust your instincts with regards to a divorce attorney, if your gut says no, even though they seem right, move on.  There are plenty of lawyers to choose from.

Many states and counties offer divorce classes on the paperwork and everything that is required for a divorce.  This is done at a very minimal cost.  They will walk you through what you may not understand.  You can also file a restraining order there if needed so any harrassment is documented for the court even if you are not married.

And while you are doing all or some of the steps above, consider the reading list from those that have been where you are now:

• But He Never Hit Me by Dr. Jill Murray
• The Verbally Abusive Relationship by Patricia Evans
• Dangerous Relationships by Dr. Noelle Nelson
• Chicken Soup for the Soul Divorce Recovery by Jack Canfield, Mark Victor Hansen and Patty Hansen
• Verbal Abuse Survivors Speak Out, Patricia Evans

This is just a list to get you started.  I hope to bring you more resources that will help.  I know it takes time to get through them.  The Survivors book helped me see what happens if you stay stuck and how it can actually be too late for people to leave the relationship in some instances.  I suppose I would say it will scare you into action.

You can obtain the books through your local library by reserving them online or go to half.com or amazon.com to get them at a reduced price.  Share them with others that may need them.

Best of luck to you!  It is my hope the resources and information will guide you in the decision you need to make in the days ahead.

Last Wednesday, a bitterly cold, miserable day here in Norfolk, I went through my usual initial weekday routine – alarm goes off, drag myself out of bed, go through the usual ablutions, get dressed and head for the kitchen to have breakfast, feed the cats and then feed the wild birds.  The ground was solid, the grass was white with the sharp frost and, needless to say, I wasn’t feeling particularly joyous,  particularly as I had to work.

I climbed the stairs to my office to check my emails and see if any work had come in overnight and saw that I had an email from Hillside.  I instantly thought it was going to be horrible news – that they had some more poor animals that they wished to take in due to torture, abuse or abandonment, but was gladdened by the news that the dogs mentioned in my previous article http://socyberty.com/society/romanian-dog-rescue along with some others were now on their way to a new, more friendly home at the Sanctuary.

The dogs, at the time of the email, were just passing through Austria and Hillside understood that about 10 had been considered strong enough for the very long journey to foreign shores.  Among them were Sanni

Brick

and Petronel

These three little refugees were to arrive with a couple of new found buddies;

Lord

and Yura.

Hillside had sent a representative across to Romania the previous week to assess the situation out there and they had reported that, due to the extraordinary sub-zero temperatures currently affecting Eastern Europe, the rescuers who had been working hard to set up temporary shelters to house the dogs, were trying to compete with the ice and snow which had reached the top of the dogs 6 ft pens. 

On Friday morning I received another email from Hillside.  Apparently 14 dogs had arrived safely at the sanctuary the previous night.  I’ve attached some photographs of the dogs, looking a little bemused and wary, as they were “unloaded” and settled down in for the night.  Ten of them were to remain at Hillside for the time being but the other four were collected by local  foster carers.

Here’s a picture of the dogs as they arrived.

and a picture of a couple of the dogs as they were about to spend their first night on Norfolk soil in safe, warm and cosy beds!

Petronel has now been adopted and the adopters had waited for hours in the icy cold at the sanctuary to collect their little waif and stray and take him to a new safe, stable, non abusive life.  Here’s a picture of the now fit and healthy Petronel with his adopter.

A couple of the sanctuary workers are still out in Romania and are hoping to be able to organise another “shipment of refugees” to UK soil in the not too distant future.

No matter how we deny the fact, a growing number of the present male population admit to having been sexually abused in their respective workplace. Defying society’s preconceived notions of male chauvinism, with men as the aggressor, isn’t necessarily what happens in real life. No matter how strong their portrayal of male power is, they too need some protection from workplace abuse and sexual advances. A growing number of male employees are officially seeking for judicial protection and legal option as they openly profess their predicament – being sexual abused.

Male sexuality, because of society’s precepts, is often misconstrued. They think that all males are incapable of being abused just because they are the stronger sex. And it’s just but fine for men to be at the receiving end of dirty talk, suggestive actions and indecent proposal — both male or female proponents. 

For its part, the World Health Organization(WHO) defines sexual health as a state of physical, emotional, mental and social well-being in relation to sexuality; it is not merely the absence of disease, dysfunction or infirmity. Male sexual health, to be properly observed, must be free from discrimination, violence and coercion. Now with this in mind, let us ask ourselves, is male sexual health being observed in an avenue of chronic sexual abuse?

However, according to a recent study, men do have second thoughts in filing a law suit against a female co-worker or supervisors. 

There are a lot of male abuses that are being reported nowadays. With this, men are slowly opening up to the fact that they need not to conceal the harsh things that they experienced in the workplace. They are slowly being educated with what they need to know about healthy male sexuality.    

Sexual health, as defined, requires an agreement and respectful approach to sexuality and sexual relationships, as well as having pleasurable and safe sexual experiences. Men do need to enjoy these acts of procreation. But how in the world would a man enjoy such things under harsh and uncomfortable circumstance? (Yes, men also can feel awkwardness.) 

Observing male sexual health doesn’t necessarily only mean the ability to enjoy and engage in sexual activity.  More than that, it is the idea of protecting one’s healthy sexuality within his utmost ability. The sad part is, some male, due to the preconceived notions of male abrasiveness, keep mum about the issue and continue to live their lives as if nothing nefarious has transpired.

The Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC), the Federal agency in charge of administrative and judicial enforcement of the federal civil rights laws, enjoins all male who have experienced sexual advances and abuse to file complaint following first the company’s protocol on such complaints. They also said that if the employer cannot – or will purposely not – act on the complaint, their agency is willing to help you in all means possible. 

Men also have the right to seek justice for any sexual abuse that has been done to them. Being open about it doesn’t necessarily make you less of a man, but the idea vigilance further stress the mark of being a man. Keeping mum on the issue wouldn’t help at all. Being vocal about it, however, could call attention and would secure proper and immediate actions to be dished out to you.

Coaches, Teachers, Preachers, Priest…so many people that parents trust with the kids. That is why it is sooooooo important for parents to talk and LISTEN to their kids daily. Ask them about their day. Watch their behavior and report anything suspicious. If the school doesnt act go to the police. I do know for a fact that the police wil send you back to the school and tell yo to report it to the school police…It happened when I was a foster mom. But I demanded a report be taken. I didnt allow them to turn me away. A parent has to be the childs voice. They have no one else to do it for them

Over 56,000 cases of child sexual abuse were reported and substantiated in 2007.

As many as one in three girls and one in seven boys will be sexually abused at some point in their childhood.

In as many as 93% of child sexual abuse cases, the child knows the person that commits the abuse.

Most perpetrators are acquaintances, but as many as 47% are family or extended family.

Approximately 30% of cases are reported to authorities. These are SAD facts……only 30% reported….Abusers are bullies…We have got to LISTEN to the children….

Facts about Sex Offenders

Let us see how much we know-and see how much of what we think has been based on the myths we have all heard about sexual assault and sex offenders. Take 5 minutes to complete the True or False Quiz: 

Most men who commit sexual offenses do not know their victim.  False. 90% of child victims know their offender, with almost half of the offenders being a family member. Of sexual assaults against people age 12 and up, approximately 80% of the victims know the offender.

Most sexual assaults are committed by someone of the same race as the victim.  True. Most sexual assaults are committed by someone of the same race as the victim. An exception to this is that people who commit sexual assault against Native Americans are usually not Native American (American Indians and Crime, 1999).

Most child sexual abusers use physical force or threat to gain compliance from their victims.  False. In the majority of cases, abusers gain access to their victims through deception and enticement, seldom using force. Abuse typically occurs within a long-term, ongoing relationship between the offender and victim and escalates over time.

Most child sexual abusers find their victims by frequenting such places as schoolyards and playgrounds.  

False. Most child sexual abusers offend against children whom they know and with whom they have established a relationship. Many sexual assaults of adult women are considered “confidence rapes,” in that the offender knows the victim and has used that familiarity to gain access to her.

Only men commit sexual assault.  False. While most sex offenders are male, sometimes sex offenses are committed by female offenders.

Child sexual abusers are only attracted to children and are not capable of appropriate sexual relationships.  

False. While there is a small subset of child sexual abusers who are exclusively attracted to children, the majority of the individuals who sexually abuse children are (or have previously been) attracted to adults.

Victims of sexual assault are harmed only when offenders use force.  

False. More than any physical injuries the victim sustains, the violation of trust that accompanies most sexual assaults has been shown to dramatically increase the level of trauma the victim suffers. Emotional and psychological injuries cause harm that can last much longer than physical wounds.

If a child does not tell anyone about the abuse, it is because he or she must have consented to it. False. Children often do not tell for a variety of reasons including the offender’s threats to hurt or kill someone the victim loves, as well as shame, embarrassment, wanting to protect the offender, feelings for the offender, fear of being held responsible or being punished, fear of being disbelieved, and fear of losing the offender who may be very important to the child or the child’s family.

It is common for both child and adult victims of sexual assault to wait some time before telling someone about the abuse.  True. It is common for victims of sexual assault to wait some time before telling someone. When the person was assaulted as a child, he or she may wait years or decades. The reasons for this are numerous: victims may want to deny the fact that someone they trusted could do this to them; they may want to just put it behind them; they may believe the myth that they caused the assault by their behavior; or they may fear how other people will react to the truth.

If someone sexually assaults an adult, he will not target children as victims, and if someone sexually assaults a child, he will not target adults.  False. Research and anecdotal evidence indicate that while some sex offenders choose only one type of victim (e.g., prepubescent girls, post-pubescent boys, adult women, etc.), others prey on different types of victims. Therefore, no assumptions should be made about an offender’s victim preference and precautions should be taken regardless of his crime of conviction.

It helps the victim to talk about the abuse.   

True. The victim’s recovery will be enhanced if she or he feels believed, supported, protected, and receives counseling following the disclosure that s/he was assaulted. However, sexual assault victims should always have the choice about when, with whom, and under what conditions they wish to discuss their experiences.

Sexual gratification is often not a primary motivation for a rape offender.   

True. While some offenders do seek sexual gratification from the act, sexual gratification is often not a primary motivation for a rape offender. Power, control, and anger are more likely to be the primary motivators

Offenders could stop their sexually violent behavior on their own if they wanted to.   

False. Wanting to change is usually not enough to be able to change the patterns that lead to sexual offenses. To create the motivation to change, some offenders need a variety of treatment and corrective interventions, and for others learning how to make the change in their own behavioral cycle of abuse is more effective.

Men who rape do so because they cannot find a consenting sexual partner.  

False. Studies suggest that most rape offenders are married or in consenting relationships.

Drugs and alcohol cause sexual offenses to occur.   

False. While drugs and alcohol are often involved in sexual assaults, drugs and alcohol do not cause sexual offenses to occur. Rather, drug and alcohol use may be a disinhibitor for the offender, while being under the influence may increase a potential victim’s vulnerability.

Victims of sexual assault often share some blame for the assault.   

False. Adult and child victims of sexual abuse are never to blame for the assault, regardless of their behavior. Because of the age difference, children are unable to legally consent to sexual acts. They are often made to feel like willing participants, which further contributes to their shame and guilt.

If a victim does not say “no” or does not “fight back,” it is not sexual assault.  

False. Sexual assault victims may not say “no” or not fight back for a variety of reasons including fear and confusion. Rape victims often report being “frozen” by fear during the assault, making them unable to fight back; other victims may not actively resist for fear of angering the assailant and causing him to use more force in the assault. Pressure to be liked and not be talked about negatively by a peer will sometimes cause adolescents or children to avoid fighting back or actively resisting.

It is time for people to stand up for those that can’t do it for themselves. Why can adults hide behind contracts and say I couldn’t call the police my contract said so? Bull shit!!! When you take on a job working with kids you are morally obligated to protect them.

The government needs to step in and now stay you will be legally obligated as well. Doctors, Teachers, Social workers, Therapists and more are… So should boy and girl scout leaders, sports coaches, foster parents, tutors …anyone that has access to children..

We trust them..they have full access to our children…..They should also be legally obligated to protect them….If they know they are being abused they are just as bad as the abuser…..

They are adult BULLIES…They are Bullying our children..It has got to stop!!          Hold them accountable!!!!!!

Be these days the boys are being used and abused by the men that parents trust the most.

Parents need to pay attention when the kids dont want to go to school. practice, church…dont want to be alone with a man…start paying CLOSE attention…. ask questions….dont assume that person YOU trust…is the best person for your child.

Please watch for the signs….If your usually loveable loud happy child is quiet, sad, crying or angry…..ask questions…take them to a counselor…Do not stop asking questions….Find out why he has changed

If you love someone, you make time for them and they make time for you. You feel it and they do. When one of you is hurting, sad, happy, excited or whatever the mood when you are in sync you will know without a single word being said.

This applies to your children as well. When my daughter walks in I can tell when something is on her mind without a word being said. I don’t ignore it. I ask and make time to listen. I let her know she is important to me. You can’t ask someone how their day was then walk away, answer the phone, watch television or start cooking. You have to make time to listen if you ask the question.

Many times people can talk and talk about themselves, but don’t make the time to listen to others. You are no more important than the person listening. Always be observant of those you say you love. If they are unusually quiet, isolated, withdrawn or angry talk to them. Don’t lecture but get them to talk. Listen to what they have to say. You don’t always have to give advice, sometimes all a person needs is someone to listen.

Sometimes all they need is someone to hold them and show they care. Never be to busy for those you claim to love. When my phone rings and my loved ones are talking to me, I let it ring. The television show can wait, the dinner can simmer….when someone you love needs you…and you say you love them…SHOW IT

Saying it all day, all week all year long doesn’t mean a thing …If you aren’t there when it really counts

Know and teach your child the signs of a wrongful touch

Signs of Wrongfull Touch

There are thousands of children’s innocents being violated everyday. The majority of the children that are being wrongfully touched are being wrongfully touched right at home by a family member or a friend of the families. Alot of family members don’t know the signs of misconduct or they overlook the acts of a child thats being wrongfully touched, so in my article through my own experiences of being a child that was wrongfully touched by a family member I hope what I went through will shed a little light on what to look out for:

1.) A child that cry’s continously when you drop them off at a sitters, family members, day care, etc. or cries when you leave them at home with a person and they never use to cry in the past.

2.) When your child tells you that there’s monster in the closet or coming out of a vent and they just can’t sleep because they were told this from the one who is wrongfully touching them.

3.) your child suddenly at night is taking off there clothes and your finding them with no clothes on in the morning.

4.) When your child is suddenly wetting the bed for no apparent reason and they never done that in the past.

5.) If your child is being violated at home your child suddenly is by your side at all times and doesn’t want to leave your side or suddenly they want to start sleeping in your bed with you.

6.) A sign that I noticed is when you ask your child if someone’s doing things to them and they have the look of fear in there eye’s and there very quiet because the one that’s violating them is in the room with both of you when asked.

7.) A dramatic drop in school grades at school and suddenly your getting notices home with your child that there not listening and doing there work during class time.

8.) If your child is female your child will suddenly complain of her private areabeing sore when she uses the restroom or her private area is red routinely even though she was tested for an infection. If male they”ll also complain of there private area hurting as well.

9.) You’ll also notice your child not listening to what there told to do, they have behavioral out breaks and develope an hate attitude towards everything.

10.) You also notice out of no where your child will start calling themselves stupid and they”ll start hitting themselves in the head.

11.) When you child is telling you or someone to touch there private area and giving the private areas nicknames.

12.) When your child is constantly changing there underwear because they feel dirty in that area.

These are a few things that I have experienced and have seen happen with children that have been violated. If you feel your child is being violated don’t be afraid to ask them but do it in a room where no one else is around, reassure your child that it’s ok to tell you and that you wouldn’t get mad and that it’s not there fault, also reassure that if someone told them that they would hurt you or them that is’t not going to happen that it’s all lies, If that’s one thing a violator does is they put fear into children that if they tell that they’ll hurt them or a family member. If your child say’s it’s a family memeber don’t doubt them by thinking no that couldn’t be because I’m sorry to tell you YES it can be and it probably is cause most of the time it happens with in the family. I hope these things that I listed are an eye opener because many people don’t know what to look for or understand why there’s a change in there childs’ behavior and maybe you need to ask yourself if this could be happening to your child.

Be informed. You can check your area. Know who your children are around. 

http://www.nsopw.gov/Core/Portal.aspx

 In California you cn research your area here as well http://www.meganslaw.ca.gov/disclaimer.aspx?lang=ENGLISH

I saw someone on the news last night going on about how smacking was a loss of control and served no purpose and that it was borderline child abuse. Seriously, where do these people get off? She had no clue but went on and on about the moral upstanding of the non-smacking parent. It is wrong!

Hopefully, if I am lucky, I will never need to smack my child. But if I feel it needs to be done to assert discipline and command respect, I won’t hesitate. I was smacked by my parents and I am grateful.

I have two articles to share with you today, which might not seem related at first. But bear with me.

The first one, from MSNBC, was about three people who were keeping four mentally disabled adults chained up in a basement with only a jug of orange juice and some buckets to go to the bathroom in. Looking at the 200+ comments on the article, people were pretty outraged and disgusted at this crime, some saying the criminals should be treated the same way as they treated their victims.

Once upon a time, the mentally handicapped were not so well thought of in society, nor so well protected. Once upon a time, limits on a person’s mental functioning also meant limits on the worth of that person’s life. It’s wonderful to see that this is, for the most part, no longer the case. The acceptable viewpoint in society is that the mentally disabled are real people who deserve protection and love. Varying levels of intelligence have no real influence on our judgment of the worth of fellow human beings. We see what these criminals did as unacceptable, perhaps even more despicable because their victims were childlike and vulnerable. Exploiting the disabled for one’s own purposes is generally agreed to be wrong.

Will there be a time when the same can be said for animals? People justify exploiting animals because human beings have a higher intellectual capacity than other animals. Smart adult animals have about the same mental capacity as human children… probably roughly similar to what these adult victims have. Animals are vulnerable and childlike in many ways. But we see them as inferior because of having less mental capacity. So, it’s okay for us to lock them in concrete or steel enclosures for extended periods of time, letting them live in their own waste, without regard for their emotional health, without regard for their physical suffering. Because they’re not as smart as we are. And there’s money to be made off them.

Why is it different? Because we’re human, and they’re not? Is it just because we only look out for our own kind? How is that so different from saying it’s okay to enslave people of other races, because we’re white, and they’re not?

Well, some people get outraged when they see videos of abuse at meat, egg, and dairy farms… but they don’t believe that this sort of thing happens all the time. They think it’s just an isolated incident… they say the individual person beating the animal should be arrested, and this is often true, but there’s more going on than just one case of a single psychotic farm worker. They can’t see, or else choose to ignore the fact that it’s the industry itself which is encouraging this abuse. It’s the way we think about animals. As objects. As inferior because of intelligence, because of a different physical shape or color… or something.

I wish there were some way to open people’s eyes, and get them thinking. What is the difference, really?

The other thing I read today was a post from the Action for Animals newsfeed on my facebook page. As much as I dislike bringing up the Holocaust…. It talks about how some people didn’t want to believe that the concentration camps of the Holocaust were real, and that it was just individual, evil officers in isolated incidents of abuse. Looking back now, most people agree that the concentration camps were real, and that thousands of people died there, people who were seen as inferior. It was the way that people thought about the Jews, the mentally disabled, and other “Others” which brought about this black mark in history.

The beginnings of this kind of tragedy still live inside of all of us. Any time we think of another living being as inferior, as an object which can be disposed of at our whims, which has no inherent value in itself… we are echoing the root cause, the spirit of the Holocaust.

So I invite you to read it, and think about it. It’s not very long. Just think about it. What is the difference? Is there one?

The Article: We Can’t See The Truth Through Rose-Colored Glasses.