A thousand fibers connect us with our fellow men;

and among those fibers, as sympathetic threads, our actions

run as causes, and they come back to us as effects.

: o ) Herman Melville

Everything we do has an effect on our life.  The decisions we put off, or act upon make us who we are now and whom we may and will become.  I say the word may before the word will due to the fact that we need to continue our chosen path. Act upon our decisions or we may become something else that was not intended.

When we have a clear focus on the world outside of our immediate self.  We will then possibly be able to add some sympathy and tolerance into our fiber.

We are made up of thousands of strands of DNA, that make us who we are in a very individualistic way.  No two of us are exactly the same.  Another miracle from our creator.

But within that individualism is a common thread, that if we focus on weaving in love, hope, compassion, sympathy, acceptance, tolerance we will indeed blend a different fabric for generations to come.  Can we do that?  More importantly will we do that?

One person at a time we can.

One person at a time we should.

One person at a time, will you be that one?

Smiles to you today and everyday : )

Video of the Day

Quotes to think on ourselves and for others

Bible Quote of the Day

“Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.”

Colossians 3:12 (NLT)

Have a blessed day everyone

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“He gossips habitually; he lacks the common wisdom to

keep still that deadly enemy of man, his own tongue”

: o ) Mark Twain

Think before you speak; how often have you heard this gem growing up? Plenty of times I am sure.

Yet time and time again we insert a word or conversation that we regret or at the very least causes more harm than good.

Everything we do and say should have powers to help or heal or at the very least do no harm.

When we reach out with our words we don’t know how much hurt they can cause, until its to late.

Words of course can also heal, help and uplift.  The power of the spoken word has positive and not so positive aspects.

So the next time you want to speak and perhaps blurt something out ask your self these questions:

What harm could these words cause another?

Does this statement share gossip or does it share good news?

Will I in any way regret the words I am about to say?

If you can take the time to practice these 3 questions then maybe you can make the time to not cause harm or discomfort.

Just saying and as always sharing and caring and sending you a smile for today : )

Video of the day

Words can Really Hurt

Scripture of the day 

Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. – Proverbs 12:18 (NIV)

Have a blessed day everyone

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1. Understand what happened.

The crucial first step. If one does not understand how events spiraled out into they way they were, how can they ever expect to know how to avoid history from repeating itself? Understand what happened, why it happened, how it happened. Evaluate anyone else and yourself in the issue clinically and objectingly. Your feelings may keep you from truthfully admitting to yourself what happened–but if you can come overcome this obstacle, you will become a stronger person with a clearer, more honest sense of self. Don’t be the person who deludes themselves to serenity but wonderingly keeps finding themselves wound up in misery. 
2. Talk to someone not involved.
People involved in a conflict have already developed their own opinion on the issue–making it hard for you to fully express yourself in fear of repudiation. Talking to someone unbiased allows you to fully gather your thoughts aloud without this fear. Though they might not get all the sides, they can give you advice for your side. From there, it is up to you to interpret their guidance and apply it to everything you know about what happened. Sometimes, all someone needs is a friend to let them vent out too– you will find a lot of anger and frustration released just by talking and discussing.
3. Ignore your hatred.
Nothing is more temperamental and short lived than hate and disgust. When people hate someone, they tend to naturally avoid them. Reasonable human beings understand that most conflict is best be avoided. If you are a type of person who is aggressively violent and catalatic, you probably find yourself in many dangerous situations much due to your offensive tactics–and you need to grow up. Do you see most adults arm wrestling and hitting each other over the heads with chairs because they are angry at each other? No. And if this happens, obviously, there is serious consequences. When something makes you angry, your always the angriest the moment it happens, descending. Life has no time for grudges. Hatred is an honest, natural emotion–but it is a barrier that blocks everyones path with foolish decisions to getting on with their lives.
4. Tie up loose ends.
In lost causes, most things are said and done. But, if for example, you attend the same school or work at the same place, meetings and accidental bump-ins result in awkward and very uncomfortable circumstances. Work something out with these people–things left unsaid are things said everytime you look into each other’s eyes.

5. Plan for the future.

Things are done. The feelings, the thoughts, and the emotional value is still there, however. When big break ups and fall-outs occur, your heart and mind are often on overdrive of the predicament. One way to stop mulling on the past is to start planning for the future. Look up. Look at all the things you can do in your life, all the people you can now spend time with now that there is nothing left for you to give to them. Becoming lost in the past makes the roads unclear for the future, and sadly it happens to many of us.

6. Be alone for a while.

Solitude is often one of the best tools for self discovery. Be alone for a while. Read a book. Go on a walk. Play some video games. Just enjoy and observe life. Explore your hobbies and interests. In abusive and detrimental relationships, people often find they have lost their sense of self during it, because of the influences the other person administered. There is no shame in what you like and what you do in your free time as long as it’s not hurting others. Don’t let anyone tell you what you can and can not do with yourself.

7. Live your life.

After many years, feelings of anger and hurt dissipate. You’ve moved on with your life, they’ve moved on with theirs. Nostalgically, you might find yourself comparing and contrasting the way things were compared to now. We learn to forget the things people say and do to us, but we never can learn how to forget how they made us feel. Wounds heal. Time is short and it goes by fast. By living your life, you continue to seperate these events day by day until you don’t even think about it anymore. Living your life, as happily and truly as you can, is the ultimate step to letting go.

One has to accept pain as a condition of existence.

One has to court doubt and darkness as the cost of knowing.

One needs a will stubborn in conflict, but apt always to the

total acceptance of every consequence of living and dying.

: o ) Morris West

Life is simple, it really is once you understand the dynamics of the choices we make.  The truth is we have trouble making choices that fit into that simplicity.

We think that there is a better way, we alter the path of success that others have gone before because we want to do it ‘Our Way’.  Not the way of ancient tales, or even of our parents who are not so ancient.  We want to blaze our own trail but yet complain about the results that we produce and have trouble accepting the consequences of doing it ‘Our Way’.

It is too laugh sometimes. LOL.

But in fact we learn to readjust and ponder over the decisions made, reflect, adjust, pray and meditate and correct our misfortunes.  We also need to take the time to speak the gratitude that we still have that opportunity to adjust and that the pain of misfortune is not permanent.

So yes the choice is always ours.

We can make the difference even in our own lives with a smile, some laughter even if the laughter is at ourselves.

That truly may be the best laughter.

Smiles to you this day : )

Video of the day

Spiritual Law of Acceptance?

Scripture of the Day 

“If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must master it.” (NIV)

Genesis 4 : 7

Have a blessed day everyone

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We care ~ We share ~ We entertain ~ We educate about the simple sincere power of the smile.  Enjoy : )

Why do people cry once they say and when they hear the word “goodbye” in a relationship? When someone walk out the door leaving the word “goodbye” made the world stopped for a while. Made us numb, made us cry, made us speechless and then screamed out why. Friends say, let go and move on, he is not worth crying for. Maybe someone better is soon to arrive so, someone must say goodbye.

What a nice consolation, what a good bargain for a broken heart. But, what if that someone who bid goodbye took my heart when he walks out the door. What if, that person imprisoned my heart in his soul and he doesn’t know about it. Did anyone know the way to find him so I can take my heart back to me before the new one comes along? One more question, how will I ever know if the new one is the right one? What is the assurance that this new one will never leave me too?

Someone must say goodbye to give way for the right one to come. I wish this time it is for real before my heart get tired of waiting. I hope the new one is the perfect love that they say “will come once in a lifetime”. Someone to make me understand that love never dies but only needs one caring hand to keep it alive. Who, will make me feel my importance that I am worth loving for the rest of his life.

Still along my journey, I have made my fair share of mistakes; my path is littered with disappointments and frustrating failures.  There are so many personal accomplishments I have not yet been able to attain.  Through my yoga practice, I have learned the importance of “acceptance of what is” and to “let go.”  Learning this is easy but practicing this is a whole other matter; something I must work on every day of my life.

I have to consistently remember the words of Buddha who said, “The secret to health and happiness is to not dwell on the past that we cannot change, nor to worry about the future which does not yet exist, but instead to live each moment earnestly and wisely, being present.”

I share this with you because with the New Year comes new promises and goals; our dreaded New Year’s Resolutions that traditionally have an 80% failure rate.  I have witnessed many dear friends that are so unhappy with their current physical state, relationships, and jobs that they keep themselves from being happy in the present moment, the only moment there is!

The road to a “higher state of consciousness” is a journey.  We must always remember that we are exactly where we are supposed to be along the path of life at this moment in time.  This year try not to set lofty unattainable goals; they will only leave you feeling defeated if you are unable to achieve them.  Instead stand first where you are along your path, accept and love yourself for who you are right now.  Instead of setting your next goal to make it 10 miles down the road before nightfall, make your goal to take only the next step.  Make each step count, being conscious and present. 

For example instead of making it your goal to lose 15 pounds by March, look in the mirror and first accept and love who you are today.  Know that you are exactly where you are meant to be right now.  Make your goals modest and attainable, perhaps to just not eat any processed food today.  With your goal being small manageable individual steps, you will be down the road in no time and before you know it you will have lost 20 pounds and wondered how it all fell off?     

There are people like myself who work better under pressure. Just because we start as late as possible on a task with a deadline, doesn’t mean we haven’t been getting organised. Our brains mull things over, search for possible solutions and consider the task from all angles. By the time we make a start, usually as close to a deadline as possible, we know what we want to do and how we want to do it. Consequently the task is undertaken in minimum time with maximum results.

I once tried to change this procrastination habit of mine, believing it was a hindrance and preventing me from achieving my fullest potential. No matter how hard I tried, my efforts failed. When I finally accepted I was a procrastinator, life moved forward with the success I desired.

If you are a procrastinator, learn to accept who you are. Procrastination is not necessarily evil. Some of us achieve more when the pressure is on and a deadline is looming. What is important is that you know well ahead that something needs to be done. As long as you know when your deadline is, you are safe to procrastinate. Let your subconscious work on your task until you know you can’t put the task off any longer. If you’re anything like me, you’ll work with more intense concentration to meet the deadline, resulting in everyone being pleased with your effort.

If you are not a procrastinator, stop believing you’re better than the rest of us. We can’t help the way we have been genetically wired. Most of us have tried changing, but with poor results. It’s like asking a left handed person to become a right handed one.

I am proud of who I am. I am proud of being a procrastinator. I challenge anyone who is a non procrastinator to tell me I haven’t been successful in my life. Rather than be judgemental, everyone needs to accept that procrastination is not evil and procrastinators can be extremely successful in both their business and personal lives.

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All things considered, I think it went well. The conversation kept up for about an hour and a half, and she barely even asked me questions. She mostly just let me talk and, well, I have a lot to say about myself. It was easy; nowhere near as stressful as I expected. She probably would have made me stop talking earlier if she wasn’t impressed, so I feel pretty good about it.

And of course, she did not believe that I’m an introvert. It’s true. I’m an INFJ. I naturally prefer to be alone, but I am not shy or anti-social in the slightest. It’s complicated.

Anyway, for the sake of my sanity and anyone else worrying about interviews that can relate, these are the things I had wanted to mention that I forgot about:

1. Cretaphobia
2. In my freetime, I like to research things on the internet that have to do with colleges, novels, and psychology.
3. I work with the three-year-olds at church for two hours every week. Have since seventh grade. I am occasionally left in charge. Go me.
4. I don’t care what people think about me.
5. The Golden Rule is nonsense in my life. Can’t believe I left that one out! That’s important!
6. I think fedoras are really cool.

Surprisingly, that’s it. I made an entire list of things to talk about, and that’s all that I didn’t cover. Now of course I didn’t go in there and spout off everything I had prepared, but I was able to find an answer to every question and I only got tongue-tied once. If anything, I said too much, but I think that’s a good thing in an interview. They get to know you better that way.

Apparently the number of applicants is growing this year. Of course. I’m not surprised at all, but it is nerve-wracking. Wish me luck, friends and random strangers. The day I get that letter from Hogwarts will either be the best or the worst day of my life. Probably the best; I tend to be optimistic regardless of my situation. I just want to know.

Now it’s snowing. In November. In MEMPHIS. Snow doesn’t exist until January, stupid. Let’s just pretend this is for me; I can relax, de-stress, and eat cookies while happiness silently covers the ground. Life is wonderful, isn’t it?

A wise woman who was traveling in the

mountains found a precious stone in a stream.

The next day she met another traveler who was hungry,

and the wise woman opened her bag to share her food.

The hungry traveler saw the precious stone and

asked the woman to give it to him.

She did so without hesitation.

The traveler left, rejoicing in his good fortune.

He knew the stone was worth enough to give him

security for a lifetime. But a few days later he came back

to return the stone to the wise woman.

“I’ve been thinking,” he said, “I know how valuable the

stone is, but I give it back in the hope that

you can give me something even more precious.

Give me what you have within you that

enabled you to give me the stone.”

‘The Wise Woman’s Stone’

Author Unknown

How often do we think that our possessions of external nature are above the value of our internal possessions.  

No its not what you have on the outside that matters most to others sometimes, no most of the time its the inside stuff that matters most.

The kindness we can give.  The love we can show.  The laughter we can share. These are the things that can give true value to another persons life.

So give that smile to another they will indeed appreciate it.

Give that kind word or compliment to that mother handling her obstacles that arise and still makes time to love her children and keep a roof with just her efforts.

Give that encouragement to the hurting soul that maybe lost a loved, as they passed on, or struggles to provide for his family in a world of uncertainty.

Give whats on the inside and share with those on the outside.

It costs little.  It is just your time, your effort that your spending, but like the ‘Woman with the Stone’ it can be life changing.

A month is coming to a close.  A new day is coming to light, a new set of hours, of minutes, of  seconds to make a difference.

Its yours…..this new day….of what will you do with it?

I close with this quote:

Every morning is a fresh beginning.

Every day is the world made new.

Today is a new day. Today is my world made new.

I have lived all my life up to this moment, to come to this day.

This moment–this day–is as good as any moment in all eternity.

I shall make of this day–each moment of this day–a heaven on earth.

This is my day of opportunity.

~Dan Custer

You are a legend.  Just one like you.  Your dreams, goals and aspirations await the future.  The history of your life will be written.

Dream Big ~ Laugh Often ~ Smile and Love Always.

Smiles from me sent your way…. today and always : )

10/30/11

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My Dad and my Sister are both fine with me wanting to start HRT (Hormone replacement therapy) and offically become female eventually(With Sexual-Reassignment Surgery), however my Mom is not.  My parents filed for divorce when I was around the age of 14, and I haven’t had a step father or a step mother ever since (With the exception of my Dad recently getting engaged, however he hasn’t paid his half of his divorce, forcing my Mom to pay the rest, so how they’d possibly get married beats me.) My parents do not live in the same house at all, and I’m stuck living with my mother.  I told my Mom back in September (Currently writing this in October) that I was Transsexual and wanted to become a woman.  At first my Mom didn’t understand, and then she started flipping out about it and threatening to call the FBI on my school.  She also told me that my school’s Gay-Straight Alliance ‘made me’ this way, which doesn’t make any sense at all.  I’ve been called a freak, retarded, mentally challenged, etc by her just because I want to simply become a woman.  Numerous times I’m told that “It’s okay to feel how I feel, as long as I don’t act upon it.”    Everytime that I try to lay it out clear for her, it doesn’t make sense (to her.)        Ever since then,  whatever I say that is remotely feminine sounding or relates to being a female is constantly shitted upon.  Why, just today when I complained about my shirt exposing too much of my chest, she told me that I don’t ‘have a chest.’  Hi, EVERYBODY HAS A CHEST.  Be it with breasts or not, there is a chest. It’s not like I said cleavage.  Regardless, even though she torments me every day…at the end of the day, her opinions don’t really matter.  I know what I need to do in life to be happy, and if she doesn’t accept that, then too bad.  I’ll be 18 next year, and until then I try to express myself freely however I can.  From stealing my Moms clothes and wearing them to school, to stealing her makeup when I first got into it back in my Sophomore year.   She thinks feelings like these can be easily erased and controlled when they can only be repressed and hidden inside you.  It looks like I’ll have to do whatever it takes to Transition, even if it means finding a place to live the day I turn 18 with no support or money (I’m not allowed to have a job and I would need a ride to places) to back me up.