Do you have the right meanings?

Many times a person is perplexed by in congruent behavior.  His friend may be saying one thing but he seems to be receiving meanings that are completely opposite.  With a frown he may be signaling his distaste.  With evasive eyes he may be showing that he does not mean to be bothered.  He may be confrontational, intimidating, or evasive.  At the same time these signals may mean different things to different people.  It is for you to hone in on these incongruities and ask for further explanations.  It is like doing research on a popular topic.  You have to explore the nuances and the circumstances of these actions.

Are you sure what you are reading make sense?

A person’s voice can be deceptive.  A raised voice to some may mean that a person is meant to intimidate a friend.  To others it might show authority.  Persons may revel in the thought that there is a strong leader at the head of a military unit.  A feeble voice may signal weakness to some.  Yet some of the most soft spoken persons are known to be effective leaders.  A person just has to be familiar with the leader in question.  However, this is only one of many traits that can make an individual come to such a conclusion.  What about the leader’s ability when he is able to look you straight in the eyes and tell you what he thinks?  What about the leader that practices what he preaches?

Can you do certain things to make sure that your meanings are accurate?

A person may look at proxemics.  It seems reliable to conclude that friends may tend to stand closer to each other.  Generally, 18″ to four feet seem to be the required distance for conversation.  Buddies are often close enough to whisper in each others ears.  They may be seen laughing, talking, and having a good time, but does this mean that they are really close friends.  These actions can also be deceptive.  They may or may not.  A person will have to know the two individuals to decipher these verbal and non verbal cues.  Julius Fast has had a lot to say about such in his book, Body Language (2002).  Even one of the earliest naturalist Charles Darwin was interested in this phenomenon in The Expression of the Emotions in Man and Animals (1872).

What signs do you have to look for?

Even the color a person loves may have special meaning.  A persons that prefers red may be more hot tempered as opposed to an individual who likes white.  White is generally seen as being more soothing and reassuring.  It is often a symbol of peace.  Red is more a color of agitation.  It represents intensity, fire and catastrophe in some circles  It may be that reading a person has to be taken in terms of the setting in which a person finds himself.  It may be in a library among stacks of books.  Hence, the impression projected is that the person may love books.  However, this could be farthest from the truth.  He could merely be returning a book for a friend and stop by to see what was there.

Do you care less about what passes you by unnoticed?

We should take care to notice incongruities in our communication with others.  These can make a great difference in the way that we communicate.  Much of this is done verbally and non verbally.  

Cover of Body Language

A raised eye brow, a frown, smile, proximity, and/or posture can mean a great deal when juxtaposition-ed with the intonation of a person’s voice.

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Makes men want to hear the words of a woman, it needs a special effort and strategy. As quoted from eHarmony, here are four ways to invite him to speak and make him pay attention only to you when communicating.

1. Less Is More
Numerous studies show that most women, spoke three times more than men. Genderlah differences that make this happen. Women tend to express all his feelings, while men usually do not. Therefore, when talking to the man you should direct to the point and stay focused on the issue. Do not widen the topic of conversation because it will make him tired and finally saturated listen to you.

2. Timing is Everything
When there is something important you need to discuss with a partner, choose the right time. If you take the topic seriously when he was a lot of work or stress at work, do not expect the lover will listen to what you say. Attention to what he needs is a good strategy to make it listen to you. Use the opportunity when he was relaxing or in a good mood.

3. Giving and Receiving
Do not forget, talk with your loved one is not a monologue but a dialogue. That is, he’s more interested in what you say if there is reciprocity in the communication process. Ask him what he thought about what you just said. Let him know that you value his opinion. Ask also how his experiences today and noticed as he spoke. Learn to give her attention, if that is what you want when you talk to him.

4. Affirm with Body Language Speech
The researchers estimate, 80 to 90 percent of human communication is done nonverbally.When the conversation, humans involves more body language such as tone of voice, eye contact, body posture, placement of hands and feet than the words coming out of the mouth. In order to better hear your words, do not just say with a loud volume, but also note the gestures. For example, an occasional touch of your hand on his arm and keep eye contact when speaking. The treatment will make your man feel valued and loved, so he will be watching what you are talking about.

One of the most exciting aspects when studying body language, however, is romance.  How do people behave when they are feeling romantic toward someone?  Well, this body language guide will give you some hints and tips for the next time you are talking to that special someone.  Here are some of the most common body language signals exhibited when people feel romantic

Women:

1. One of the most common body language techniques used by women to attract men is flipping their hair over their shoulder.  The second most common is twirling her hair.  Needless to say, if a girl touches her hair, she may have an eye for you.

2. The Leg wrap- if she has her legs tightly wrapped around each other (as though she is sitting with her legs crossed, but tighter), this is definitely a good sign.

3. Women touch their necks when they are trying to show that they trust you.  They will also “display” more of their necks, by tilting their heads to the side.  Either way- this is a very good sign.

4. If she tries to pick imaginary lint off of you, fix your tie, or fix your appearance in any way (especially if she gets to touch you in the process)- she is definitely into you.

5. Look at her pupils.  If they are larger than they normally would be- she may have her heart set on you.

Men:

1. Look for the “cowboy stance”- if he stands with his fingers through the loopholes of his pants, he is trying to direct your eyes to more than just his zipper.

2. Look at his posture.  If he is making himself look “bigger”- this is an alpha male thing- it is a very good sign.

3. He will try to touch you in “innocent” ways- your shoulder or your elbow for example.

4. He will preen (yes, like a bird).  He will fix his hair, his socks, adjust his clothing, etc.

5. Pupils.  Yep, his pupils will dilate too if he is really interested.

This is just a short, introductory guide to reading romantic body language.  Hopefully, though, it will get you started thinking about the many ways in which learning to read body language could be helpful to you.

How Can To Tell If You Fall in Love Some One’s 

The spirit of a man is hard to read, but his body language is not. Of course, the best way to tell is to ask, but can be difficult for many women there. Here are some tips that can help. 

He flirts with you 

Flirting is an easy way to tell a guy is in you. A man is flirting with eye contact, smile and have a first contact. He is interested in what you like and you can not use cheese lines. There are other signs as well, but the key most important is eye contact. 

Body language 

Body language is very important when it comes to knowing if a man is in you. If he really likes, it tends to lean more. If he is standing with open arms, it means that you want to be close. Still faces, even when you are in a group, always looking to hug you and touch you are good signs, too. The man is usually a reflection of their movements. For example, if you sit cross-legged on the right side, you can cross your left side. 

Eye Contact 

Please, try to make eye contact and if the shy type, who quickly looked. When he is around and something happens, for example, someone’s joke, you look to see how he reacts. Audacity can also help pressure. It may be that by taking into account, no. 

Attention to detail 

A guy who is going to the middle to laugh and have fun. Ensures that asks for your opinion every time he does something. 

He told someone that 

A man who loves you, you provide about others and tell your friends that you love. He can tell someone that you know you are attractive, with the hope that they will contact you. 

He is nervous 

Check for signs of nervousness, sweaty palms, restlessness, nervous laugh, take a deep breath and look away if you notice it too much. These are all signs of attraction, and would be nervous about making a good impression. You can also see how, when you call his name, turning his head slowly and hit reacts. 

He smiled 

A good smile can say that he is trying to attract attention. Some guys you can always come by the way, only smiles at you, then you know. 

What do your friends, 

If a man loves you, your friends make fun of him when he is around. You can try to tell you he loves you and you like too. If you’re there, see it or try to talk with you two together? It’s a good sign. 

Food

In my opinion Americans should be the most well prepared nation to experience another country’s normal foods. As I have explained to people here in Hungary, the US was a created nation from the grouping and immigration of other nations. We may have started out a primarily British originated country, but over the years we have been the refuge of other nationalities do to our ‘free’ and sometimes ‘equal’ policies. So when these people came to our country, they brought there foods with them. This naturally morphed our country into having sort of a compilation of foods from different nationalities. In my home we primarily eat a lot of Irish and Italian style cooking (because our family’s cultural back rounds), but I still have eaten from a lot of other styles as well.

So with that said, the normal foods of Hungary I am pretty much well prepared for. The biggest meal of the day is lunch (as opposed to dinner for us). The typical lunch almost always starts with soup, which can range from a chicken to a cabbage base. It is also very common to top off the soup with sour cream or chill pepper. Then is the main coarse of usually meat and a side (Rice or potatoes). And finally some kind of desert, usually cakes. On a comical note, some Hungarian cakes I would classify as cookies, but when explained to me what kind of cake it is in English, they will almost always avoid using the word ‘cookie’. That is because the the word in Hungarian refers to an abnormally small piece of male genitalia. The other meals of the day are more like snacks, and I often find myself eating a sandwich.

 The weirder things that I have seen or eaten are just a little bit harder to get down though. Hungarians like to put toppings on EVERYTHING. The most known instance of this is putting ketchup and mayonnaise on their pizza. Hungarians also eat some of the less desirable parts of animals as well. I have eaten pig ears, pig toes, chicken hearts, and chicken livers. But there are also things like bulls penis, cow eyeballs, horse sausage, and chicken testicles. The absolute weirdest thing I had here was this kind of gelatin that contain the ears a toes of a pig.

Tradition

When I talk about tradition I will mainly speak about holidays. 

Nameday: Since Hungary is a mostly Catholic nation, Hungarians label certain days for saints and certain characters in the bible. If you have the same name as this person, then this is your nameday. Namedays are sort of celebrated as minibirthdays.

Christmas: Christmas in Hungary is usually celebrated on two separate days. Since St. Nickolaus’s nameday is on the 6th of December, he bring small presents and chocolates on that day. But as for the 25th, baby Jesus or an angel brings presents to the good little girls and boys, not Santa.

Easter: For Easter the boys are supposed to sprinkle the girls and then the girl will give them sweets and decorated eggs in return. The fathers will also sprinkle their daughters and give them treats as well.

Independence Day: There are many independence days in Hungary because Hungary was invaded by many different nations. They were invaded by the Mongolians, Turkish, Austrians, Germans, and Russians so they have an Independence Day for each of these times.

Communication

Communication can be classified by two things, spoken language and body language.

Spoken language: The spoken language of Hungary is refereed to as “Magyarul” by Hungarians, but other countries refer to it as some variation of Hungarian. Hungarian is classified as one of the hardest languages in the the world. The setup of this language differs from any other European language, unlike most of the others who are relatively similar. Hungarian is a free language, meaning that you can usually put the words in any order you want and have the meaning usually stay the same. The language also has many suffixes to put on the ending of the word. Asztal means table, while Asztalon means on the table.

Body language: As a boy, when I walk in the room it is customary to shake every other mans hand when entering a room. You also give ‘puszi’ or two kisses on each side of the cheek to the females and very close male friends. Also, any personal direct action must be carried out with eye contact. So when clinking glasses or shaking hands you must keep eye contact or you will come off as rude.

Your mind-set and assurance are immediately attached to the body language.

This sub interaction can be considered through a wide range of non-verbal interaction hints, such as side, go, and leg activity, overall pose, touching, actions, joy and frowns, look, breaks, express develop, express message, eye get in touch with and inhaling styles.

How you have yourself will immediately impact how you experience. Try these workouts below.

Hold your go up higher, have a enormous look that is expanded ear to ear, while you move happily and observe how you experience.

Afterwards try simply to move around with a big scowl on your experience, slump over, have your go down, put both and fingers in your openings and observe how you experience when you do this.

Did you observe an alteration from both of these body postures?

Anybody can discover many details about other individuals by themselves language. You can tell if a women is assured, if she is into you, if she is into somebody else, and especially if somebody is shy or just anxious.

Think about somebody who is really assured and excellent with ladies maybe somebody like Will Jackson in the film Problem.

Now, take a look how he strolls, how he rests, how he talks… and how he gets VERY relaxed quickly in a scenario that would create most folks very unpleasant. He is relaxed, relaxed, orders interest, looks you in the experience and requires up location.

When I move into a bar. I act as if I own the location. I sit on the seat and take up a ton of location. I’m propagate out as much as possible My toes are up on the desk.

When I discuss to somebody I get their interest first than I go into a relaxed body location. I’ve discovered that when I do this everybody is more sensitive and considering what I have to say. I can direct them very quickly. This is because I’m comfortable and I owe this to myself language

Then see what you do not have eyes. Are you looking directly at you or looking away? The latter could indicate that they feel shy.The first means it is likely that the body language of attraction, expressing their interest in you and you alone right now and if this is your opportunity to succeed. If she seems focused on something else that has nothing to do with you, you probably lost interest and it is time to re-engage, or cut bait.
What are you doing with your arms and legs? Without looking too crudely, to see how she is holding. If the arms are crossed, it is cold or bored. One of them can be resolved, another may say it’s not just you.
If your legs are crossed, to see if it has taken toward or away from you, and if it is considered close to you. All the time he learns that the positions or address, this means you are interested in you.
Did you played at all? What are you doing with your hands? If you play with her clothes or hair, which can be very nervous. It’s your job to read this and put him at ease. If you try to get to play often, it is likely to show interest.
It is important to read body language of attraction not to be so caught up in the observation that you forget to participate!
Also, remember that your body language will tell you that the control and accordingly! It is important not only for you to learn to read each other, but also to find ways to make the other more comfortable and in tune. In doing so, you could be on your way to a long term relationship!

A recent significance by a body-language expert revealed a way of easily finding out if anyone is speaking the truth. He says, noticing specific body languages helps people find out if anyone is speaking the truth. There are total four methods to find out.

The body language expert, Mark Salem, says that if anybody is talking while looking directly and not blinking, or behaves unnatural, then he is lying.

Or if somebody tries to laugh while s/he is talking or says words like ‘yeah like that’/ ‘same thing,’ then he is probably hiding something or seeking support of a lie.

Or if someone tries to hide his mouth with his hands or tries to cough purposely, he is lying.

Apart from that, if someone tries to/laughs rapidly, then he is trying to hide his crime by laughing it away. About that, Salem said, if someone truly is laughing, then his intention is reflecting on his face. The two corners of his/her eyes will lighten up, and his forehead and eye-brows will shoot up with his mouth. But the effects of a fake laugh will appear immediately and vanish soon.

Comment if you find it useful.

How can you ensure people are judging you accurately and also seeing your best side? You never want to give people an inauthentic impression — many people can intuitively feel if someone is being fake immediately. However, any time you meet someone for the first time, you always want to start on the right foot. Here are a few ways you can make sure people’s first impression of you is a good one:

1. Set an intention. The most important thing to do for giving a good impression is to set your intention. This is especially important before any kind of big event where you would be meeting a lot of people — i.e. conferences, networking events or friend’s parties. As you get ready or when you are driving over think about what kind of people you want to meet and what kind of interactions you want to have. This can be an incredibly grounding experience and works very well to focus on what kind of energy you want to have for your event.
   
   
2. Think about your ornaments. Clothes, make-up, jewelry, watches and shoes are all types of ornamentation and people definitely take these into account when making initial judgments. I highly recommend getting some of your favorite outfits or ornaments together and asking friends you trust what they think of when they see them. For many men, they do not realize that their watch can say a lot about them. For women, purses and large earrings or jewelry can also indicate a lot to a new person they are meeting. Make sure that what you are wearing and how you do your hair or make-up says what you want it to say to the people you are meeting for the first time.
   
   
3. Be Conscious of Your Body Language. Body language is a crucial part of first impressions. Everything from your posture to how you carry yourself to the way you’re angling your body. Often, simply being aware of your body language can result in immediate improvements. Another way to examine your body language is to look at yourself on a video walking around a room. Subconscious cues to keep in mind include noticing where you point your feet, the position of your shoulders, and the way you shake hands.
   
   
4. Avoid bad days. People who go to cocktail events or mixers after having had a bad day typically continue to have a bad day. If you are in a depressed or anxious mood, others will pick up on this from your facial expressions, comments and body language. If you’re having a bad day, stay home! Otherwise, find a way to snap yourself out of your bad mood. I find working out or watching funny YouTube videos before events often gets me in a more social, feel good mood.
   
   
5. Be interested and interesting. If you are truly interested in meeting people and are open to learning about who they are, they will get this in a first impression. We have all had the experience of meeting someone and knowing instantly that they were dragged here by a friend and are just waiting to get out the door and head home. When you are meeting people for the first time approach others with a genuine interest in who they are. This is often contagious and you will have better conversations and lasting connections when you are interested because they become interested.

John had raised his head, surveyed the mansion before him, walked briskly and climbed the steps taking two at a time. “Hi, Anne, I didn’t know you are a princess, and you lived in a castle like this. Hope I’m not late,” he said and kissed her.

“No, you’re on the dot, and my family is keen to meet you at supper,” she said and led him through the door to the spacious living room filled to the brim. She introduced him first to her dad, mom and then to her three brothers, a younger sister and half a dozen cousins.

“John, come and sit next to me. We are happy to meet you. Relax, feel free in my home,” Allen, Anne’s father said.

Although the leather sofa was comfortable and the small crowd exuded warmth and welcomed him heartily, John felt ill at ease. He could see they focused on him.

“I’m overwhelmed. I didn’t know Anne lived in a palace,” he said.

“Don’t let that disturb you,” Allen said and put his arm on John’s shoulder as if he were assuring him.

By then a maid served soup in a silver salver. While picking up his cup, John knocked the salver and caused a couple of spoons to drop. “I’m sorry,” he said as he bent to pick them up.

“Never mind, the maid will do it. You tell me about yourself. Anne thinks heavens of you,” Allen said.

“I’m sorry again as I’ve nothing much to say apart from what Anne must have told you. I’m Mr. Average.”

“You’re being modest,” Emma, Anne’s sister said.

“Hey, let’s not put him through cross examination, OK?” Bill, Anne’s elder brother, said.

“Why don’t we adjourn to the dining table?” It was Anne’s mom who looked like a queen without a crown. Her word carried a lot of weight, and everyone moved to the adjacent room, equally spacious and fitted with Persian rugs and chandeliers. The long dining table of shining teak wood had been laid for the whole family. John, guided by Allen to his seat, noted the exquisite carving of the table and the lavish spread which looked like a royal feast. The chandeliers, artwork on the walls, fixtures, crystal glassware, bone china crockery and silver cutlery reeked of opulence.

During the first course, John dropped a knife and felt as if he had dropped a brick.

“Never mind, enjoy the supper. Can you believe Anne planned all this herself?”

“Now I’ll believe anything.”

The dinner proceeded smoothly as everyone made politically correct comments put John at ease. On completion of the dinner, the small crowd had adjourned to the living room and made small talk with some back slapping in between. Finally, it was time for John to say good night. When he left, Anne followed him and took him to the lawns. Allen adjourned to the study beside the living room.

Bill, first off the blocks, broke the silence that had ruled for fifteen minutes. “What do you guys make of him?”

“Look, Anne loves him and does it matter what we think of him?” Emma said.

“Besides, why should we be judgmental?” the second brother said.

“I want to be sure he’s not a gold digger,” the mom said.

“He is a bit diffident, I must say,” Emma said.

“He doesn’t seem to be from our league,” the second brother opined.

Soon there was a babble of voices and everyone expressed what he thought of the visitor that evening. John didn’t belong and wooed Anne with a motive; they arrived at a consensus.

“Stop it.” The commanding voice of Allen silenced the entire family.

“Here it is, John’s love is real, and he is an honest man.” He produced a printout and a gilt edged certificate of love. Everyone, especially the mom, tried to inspect it.

“You may ask how I’ve certified his love. Just read the print out.” He produced a printout of three pages, which at the end showed four stars in gold.

“What’s this? A certificate of love? I can’t believe it,” the mom said after a quick perusal.

“This is given by new software that checks the posture, gait, body language, focus of eyes, lip movement, modulation of speech, movement of facial muscles especially the lips, activity of the eyebrows, extent of smile, flexing of shoulder muscles and above all the speech pattern. The cameras in the porch and living room and the monitor in my pocket had analyzed all his movements and spoken words and fed it to the computer in the study. You can see he gets four stars. Now I’m sure Anne made a right decision.”

“How do we know the software is foolproof?” the mom asked.

“It is the state of the art and has been used recently on a nominee for Presidential elections about sexual allegations leveled against him.”

“If the computer certifies their love and awards four stars, that is it. What are we waiting for? Let’s invite John to join the family,” the mom said with finality.

Image by Alan Light via Flickr

“We can have the wedding soon,” Emma jumped and clapped her hands.

They all trouped out to the lawns where the couple locked in an embrace had stood and watched the full family in awe.

“OK, Anne, let’s fix the date for the wedding.”