God may want us all to be in his flock but He isn’t a puppeteer and He doesn’t want us to be puppets. This is the gift of freewill, the freedom to make choices, the freedom that we always abuse.

I once talked to an old guy on the street. He was an acquaintance. With my incapacity to sugarcoat his situation, making it sound a little less brutal, I could say his life is broke. “I am very unfortunate! God, made fun of my life,” he said. If I were too harsh to be too frank with him at the moment, I would have told him “you are so wrong, sir!” I could do that. I just chose not to. It would be unhealthy for both of us. And I simply couldn’t bear the guilt of making him feel worse.

His wife and children left him. The temptation, according to him, is so strong that he couldn’t be faithful to his wife. He had my sympathy but inside my mind, I was rationalizing things over the principles that I believe in. Temptation, no matter how strong has no power over us. It is us, who decided to give in to it. The reason temptation appears very strong, is its ecstatic effect on us. And it is simply hard to say no on things that we fancy or things that make us feel immensely pleased even just for a moment. Ice cream for me is very irresistible. It is so strong that once I start eating a scoop of ice cream from the fridge, I sometimes end up eating almost half a gallon. It happens not because the ice cream possesses some kind of power to control over me, but because I chose to give in to the pleasure of eating ice cream. Even the biggest form of temptation, like sex and infidelity, come in somewhat similar packaging.

Life as a whole is governed by the different choices we make. Everything we do, even the moment we wake up, we are faced with decision-making situations. Some things may appear like routine works that don’t need much thinking, but whether we are aware of it or not, everything is subjected to making a particular choice. Should I pray or not? Should I fix my bed or postpone it or let someone do it? Should I brush my teeth first before peeing or the other way around? Should I take a bath or not? Should I wear this or that? Should I eat this or that? Whatever we do, it is part of the decision we make. No one can stop anyone from doing anything because that is everyone’s freewill. Knowing that everything is a choice, why can’t we simply choose the right ones?

English: Subway restaurant, 4009 Carpenter Road, Pittsfield Township, Michigan (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

It is a common misconception that Subway, the restaurant is a healthy choice. From the late 1990s to present day, many people believe that by eating Subway is a healthy choice. So is it? The answer is simple… it depends on what you order. 

Initial Issues:

The Bread: One of the main issues with Subway is its bread. The bread roughly contains between 200 to 260 calories in total, with choices like whole wheat and white being on the lower side and italian being on the higher side. But, one of the things that many people don’t know is that the healthiest choice of Bread is actually Plain White, not the 9 grain whole wheat. This is because the other bread types contain high amounts of high fructose corn syrup, which is one of the main contributer to calories, and subsuqently fat. 

The Meat: At subway, in order to compete with many other restaurants, they offer a diverse assortment of meats to select. Although most seem healthy (like the Assorted collection) for example, many of them actually arn’t. Meats like Assorted, meatballs, pepperoni are loaded with calories and fat, not to mention high amounts of sodium, which is bad for the body. 

The Sauces: Nowadays, they have a print out of the healthy and unhealthy choices. But just to reaffirm, be sure to avoid items like Mayo, Chiptole & other ‘flavourful’ sauces. Instead, choose options like honey mustard, plain mustard or ’sweet onion’, although it does kinda fit in the unhealthier choices. 

The Extras: Obviously, its important to resist snacks like chips and cookies. Avoid sugared pop, and I would recommend purchasing water opposed to the pop, even the 0 calorie ones. Nowadays, they have Yogurt avaliable, which is always a good replacement for the unealthier snacks. 

Conclusions: 

So Subway, like most other fast food chains, can be healthy or unhealthy, depending on what you order. The best option is to get a Subway salad, with the ‘healthier’ choices for dressing. For snacks, choose water + yogurt over the other alternatives. Remember, its only healthy depending on what you actually order. 

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We all have our predjudices. They may not be racial, they may have more to do with distain for poor people, or alcoholics, drug addicts, thieves, or any number of other levels of misfortune. We can sound very smug, when we firmly state that “That could NEVER happen to me!” We pride ourselves in making better choices in life. We are so proud to brag about how much better we plan for our lives, and how people make their own bed, and now must sleep in it. 

Most children, when asked what they want to be when they grow up, do not say, “I wanna be an alcoholic and a wife beater, just like my papa.” Most children will focus on what is noble, such as being a firefighter, a policeman, a pilot or a doctor. Little girls especially think about being a nurse, a teacher, a mother or veteranarian. Of course, in little girl or boy fashion, there are those who simply say, “I wanna be rich!” 

Along the way, and long before the child reaches adulthood, hormones kick in, adventure is right outside the door, and the feeling of being immortal is firmly established. In those years of learning and experimentation, much can go wrong. Too much drinking and partying can lead to alcoholism, disease, lack of sexual morality, loss of respect and expectation of self, and disregard of those in authority, including parents. Once a ball starts rolling with a young person who is trying to find their way in life with perhaps little guidance, there is little knowledge about how to stay on the tracks. Fun takes over, and school may drop by the wayside, as does a future that must be built on something stronger than self-interest and parties.

Even those who had “all the right things,” got an education, had money, had success in life and otherwise enjoyed all the benefits, can follow irresistable urges for drink, sex, money, power or worse. If you were to ask that person in prison, doing 30 years for stealing money or some other crime, if they planned to go to prison, they would think you were out of your mind.

At the bottom of this heap of humanity, lies feelings and beliefs we all have. These might be feelings of rejection, feelings that we don’t have enough money or posessions, unworthiness or lack of love. All of these feelings stem from our thoughts about ourself and life. Our thoughts can take over, if not reigned in, and we can believe what we tell ourselves after awhile. It becomes our truth. When we don’t listen to others who try to tell us another truth, a better truth, we sink. Maybe we don’t have evidence of a better truth, and while we don’t plan to end up in prison for 30 years, one thing leads to another, and to another, with an increasing risk of our destroying ourselves.

If I steal $10 from a friend’s coffee table because I am out of work and need food, and that person will not lend me money, thoughts about what I have done may start. “Well, that was easy. I don’t feel right about it, but at least I got some food.” This may lead to, “Heck, I’ve done favors for him many times. It was payback time anyway. He owes me.” It continues to, “A lot of people owe me favors. I’m gonna go collect one way or another.” The world becomes a symbol for all that have done this person wrong. So, when this individual robs a convenience store or steals a car to sell, it can be justified by the thought patterns that preceed them. We convince ourselves that the world is full of rotten people who do not love us, so they get what they get. It snowballs.

Along the way, we may experiment with drugs or alcohol, telling ourselves that the world is so bad, that the only way we can cope with it is to get high or drunk. It starts to feel good, but it takes more and more to feel good any more. And who can think straight, or be responsible for actions under the influence?

People who have damaged their lives didn’t plan for things to happen this way. Inch by inch, piece by piece, things started falling apart. Getting a grip at some point became more of an overwhelming task, and it was easier just to surrender.

“There but for the grace of God, go I” has been around for a long time. I do not know who said the original quote. It is universal. All of us could be in deep trouble or have serious problems. Even being “all grown up” doesn’t save us from becoming an alcoholic or committing suicide. Senior citizens are known for robbing a store for the first time in their 70’s because they have no money and they are desperate. 

Our ivory towers are built on shaky ground, and it pays to do inventory on our foundation frequently. Often little cracks will appear, and they should not be ignored. We have seen what happened to others who did not tend to their own foundations. Health and wellness deteriorated, friends were losts, money evaporated, and trails of sorrow were laid down. The foundations to lives crumbled. 

Compassion begins with seeing that we are all on potentially shaky foundations, and that we make our own foundations stronger when we help those who are in  the rubble. There, but for the grace of God, go all of us.

The first thing that you should talk about is how they’re going to organise themselves. Coursework and assignments are very much self led in sixth form, and this means that they are going to have to take the time to consider how they’re going to fit all of their work in without falling behind. You should provide a place for them to work that is away from any distractions, and make sure that they understand just how much they have to work. Most colleges recommend 5 hours per subject per week, which makes around 20 hours of extra study. 4 hours each day, keeping the weekends free for personal activities, usually works the best. If your child has free periods during college, then you have to trust that they’re using these for work if they tell you that this is the case. Sometimes, you can have two or three free periods, meaning that a lot of the work really can be done in college. The only way that sixth formers learn is by their mistakes, and they will realise that they need to put more work into their studies when they come to their first set of exams.

The next thing that you have to do is talk to them about what they would like to do when they finish their A Levels. Although it might seem strange to be talking about this now, they need to be thinking about their future, as the next couple of years will fly by for them. You should find them lots of University prospectuses, and take them on open days if they would like to go, and then you can feel as though you’re being involved in their decision. The more you are involved, the more they are likely to tell you about what they’re deciding, and that will be great for your relationship in the long term.

Although you might not think that there is much you can do to control the behaviour of your yougn adult, you should still try to encourage them not to spend too much time at parties and then not enough time studying. There is plenty of time for that at University, when it is at least legal to drink, so it is important that they get their head down and study hard so that they will be able to get into the course of their choice at the end of their A Levels. Although it is a tricky process, if you work together as a family, you should find that you are all a lot stronger for it. 

This is not an article of blame. This is an article about our educational system, and the basic elements that make living life either managable or a struggle. 

Do you remember what you learned in elementary school? How about junior high? Do you remember your courses after that? If you were like most kids, depending on what era in which you grew up, you can boil most of what you learned into basic academic classes such as English, math, science, history, geography, political science, gym, arts/woodshop, etc. These vary, of course, but most education is learning how to memorize stuff and pass tests when needed. Do you use these classes today in your daily life? Most of it, probably not.

Looking back on my school years, I wish I had been given the opportunity to take classes such as these:

Elementary School – “”How to Stay out of Fights With Others”, “Teachers Make Mistakes, Too”, “When to Talk to Someone About Problems at Home”, “The Bullies in Your Life”, “You are a Wonderful Person”, “Make Money on the Weekends”, “Doing Everything You Like Can be Dangerous.” This list could stretch to the moon, of course. But learning self-esteem, ways to be careful, ways to communicate with peers and adults and knowing that making money can be fun, are all important lessons. Not one of these lessons did I learn as a child. Many, like me, didn’t learn them, either, and as adults, still deal with these same issues.

Junior and Senior High – “How to Choose a Quality Date”, “How to Honor Yourself in Everything”, “Mistakes Now Will Always be Remembered”, “How to Love Yourself Just the Way You Are”, “Sex is Not Love and Love is Not Sex”, “How to Honor Your Parents”, “How to Make Money on Weekends”, “Planning for a Career You Like”, “How to Handle Rejection” and “Guilt is a Compass”. Again, the list is almost endless, but these can teach us a bit about being selective about finding a mate, learning to listen to our inner selves for guidance, honoring and listening to parents who do have more experience as a rule, respecting ourselves and our behavior and how to earn money to buy the things we need.

Can we recognize ourselves or someone we know in these lists? I cannot remember one time when I could reach back to something I learned in school (academically) to help me through a tough time growing up. 

As adults, we can now see how the lack of knowing “what to do” or how to think is hurting us as families and as a society. Teaching adults these lessons ten, twenty, thirty or even more years later is often too late. So much other mal-coping behavior has installed itself on our hard drives, that there is little room for new learning, without getting rid of the old stuff. How does one do that? Counseling can help, but many of us actually need to go to a school of “Life Skills” to learn ways to live life in a more productive way.

Prioritizing was never taught, either. There are adults who don’t know that buying a new car is not as important as saving for emergencies, such as getting fired. People sometimes don’t know when an opportunity presents itself, or why it is important to take advantage of it. Adults often cannot “read the road ahead”, which is a basic principle in learning to drive a car. Don’t just look at what is right in front of you, look three, four or more cars down the line, because what is down there is going to be in your face shortly. Do you see brake lights? This inability to plan ahead is why people tailgate in traffic and end up in an accident. Many live their lives the same way.

Lessons about money – how to spend it carefully, how to save it, how to plan for the possibility of not having any, and how not to waste it is invaluable. Many folks have no clue about saving, being thrifty, planning for emergencies or making sure they have a roof over their heads. Truly, many individuals think all this stuff is boring, boring, boring. It can be. But so can living under a bridge with no food. Or moving back in with your parents at the age of 35. 

Resourcefulness – finding ways to solve problems through creativity and motivation is important. If you were stranded on an island, would you know what you need to survive? Would you even know how to start a fire, build a shelter or find food? Would you know how to protect yourself against animals or insects? Resourceful thinking, whether it is on an island or in the middle of Manhattan, is crucial for physical and emotional survival. 

We cannot teach people who do not want to learn, and as adults, we pride ourselves in our life experiences. We like to think we know it all, in spite of the fact that our lives may be falling apart. 

Learning to listen to others who may have a better view on what is hurting us and ideas on ways to deal with it, is a wise choice. We let our egoes get in the way of listening. I hear the expression a lot, “I get it!” said by people who don’t get it at all, and who aren’t listening. “Been there, done that”, is another saying. Yes, maybe you were, and maybe you did, but did you learn anything?

It is frustrating to find that so many people in our society are simply ill-equipped to make smart choices, or at least informed choices. There is an expression, “We don’t know what we don’t know.” There are missing pieces to our knowledge, and I believe that people who are willing to listen and consider what others are offering to teach us is invaluable. Getting defensive only keeps us locked in patterns that do not serve us. Others may not have the answer, either, but sifting through information and trying out some options can be an adventure that works well, sometimes. 

Until we create Schools for Objective Thinking, or other classes to help folks understand what they never understood, it is likely that life will continue to be a struggle for some and a tragedy for many. In the meantime, it is a fantasy of mine that we can understand that our school children need more than academics. They need to learn how to navigate life successfully.

The first thing that you need to think about is how far you’re willing to move. Some people cross the world to go to university, while some are not willing to go anywhere that they need to move out of their home for. You should consider things such as how you’d get to university from home, how much things are going to cost where you’re planning to live, and what you would do if you were not able to go to your first choice university. 

The second thing that you should think about is which subject you’re going to want to do. Different institutions are better at different subjects, and this means that you should always look into this rather than just thinking about which university is best overall. You can find information about this on a lot of websites. You need to make sure that the subject of your choice is something that you really enjoy, as you’re going to be dedicating a lot of time and effort to it over the course of the next few years should you get onto the course of your choice.

The other thing that you need to consider is whether you’re going to get the grades that you need. You should know how good you are at your chosen A Level subjects and will therefore have some kind of idea about which places will be in your ability and which just will not. There is not all that much point in applying to places where you’re just not going to be able to get the grades, because this means that you will have much less chance of getting an offer to somewhere that it is possible for you to achieve.

When you have considered all of these things, then you should have a decent shortlist of some universities that you think you could be able to attend. Once this is the case, you can start booking yourself onto open days at the universities that you like the look of. You will not know whether you truly want to attend anywhere until you have been there. You will then be able to see what the local areas are like, what the buildings are like, what the tutors are like, and what the halls of residence are like. All of these things are important when you’re making your choices, because at the end of the day you have to live there for several years of your life, so you want it to be somewhere that you’re going to be able to be happy.

Overall, just remember that this is going to be one of the most imporatant decisions that you might ever take for yourself. This is not just about your education, but it is also about the rest of your life, and this means that you really need to think hard about which university you eventually choose. For me, university was one of the best times of my life, and I know that this could be the case for you as well if you make a well informed decision for yourself. 

Through your toil, there are some things that impact on your life.  I have had some work opportunities that gave me extra set of skills and experiences different from others.  This is one of those things that make me a unique, different person that brings those things to the table.  If you imagine, the additions you brought into your workplace created a better environment, increased productivity, or even impact for extra business opportunity.

Imagine if you will that all of your labor is completely changed to something totally different from your effort.  There would be some feelings of angst, anger, or even sadness because all of your efforts were completely removed.  This is an example of vexation that is made known through the wise man in Ecclesiastes.

Solomon makes an effort to work wisely, diligently, and with great labor.  He describes his toil as a point of anger, “I hated all my toil… seeing that I must leave it to the man who will come after me (v. 18, ESV).”  The toil in which you work for, or the wise man endured, was that all of the efforts made were a mere exasperation because someone else took his credit.  The work made would not just give someone else credit, but that effort through work could get botched by someone else. 

The work we do in our lives is rather difficult to accomplish, but there is joy completing work for you.  If you were a writer and wanted your work to come into fruition, you would enjoy your work bringing massive returns.  If your effort really pays off, you will enjoy the fruits of your labor.  As Solomon also points out, “Nothing better for a person…find enjoyment in his toil. This is from the hand of God (v. 24-25, ESV).” 

Here are some takeaways we can learn from Ecclesiastes 2:18-26.

Do you find your work frustrating?

How is your work making an impact?

What are you working for?

Are you allowing your work to benefit yourself or others? Why?

How are you enjoying the fruits of your labor?

In the course of any context, we develop a better understanding on our friendships, relationships, and our so-so life with our co-workers.  I imagine that with our mistakes, and seeing the mistakes of others that we understand human nature.  If any of us were a perfectionist (or know of one) something about human nature is frustrating.

Either way, wisdom is a more developed nature that expels folly, and has an enduring impact on life.  Through wisdom life seems bearable.  As it is said, “Then I saw that there is more gain in wisdom than in folly (v. 13).”  The perception of wisdom in life does have a lasting impact, but what use is it if the foolish expel the wisdom and make the rest of this world life in folly? 

The vanity of wisdom in life is the grievous nature on the lasting impact.  Death still happens, the life cycle continues, and the wind still keeps cycling.  The wisdom would have become rediscovered if the real wisdom is not passed on from generation to generation.  The choice still remains whether we choose to live wisely or with folly.

Here are some takeaways we can learn from Ecclesiastes 2: 12-17. 

How can you give a lasting impact on your environment? 

Where do you find wisdom, folly, and madness? 

Why can this become so grievous in nature? 

And what have you done that is left upon the future?

                How can we have the perspective of owning all of these things and believing that our heart is truly set?  In the passage from Ecclesiastes 2: 1-11, Solomon talks about all of the possessions, wealth, and becoming the wealthiest of individuals.  He even says, “..of pleasure, ‘What use is it?’” (v. 2, ESV).  He chased after alcohol, ownership, displays of wealth, and yet he still claims that this is not the pursuit of life.

                Through his pursuit of all of these things, he still kept his wisdom.  However, through all of the pursuits of his heart, he still felt empty through this endeavor.   Through all of this pursuit, do you still chase after things that still have no meaning to it?  Will not your possessions dwindle over time?  Are you still lost in this pursuit?

                In these many questions, this wise man did understand one thing.  In verse 11, Solomon says, “Then I considered all that my hands had done and the toil I had expended in doing it, and behold, all was vanity…” (ESV).  You must ask yourself this question, what is there you can pursue that all of these things can become a reality for your life.

Here are some takeaways from this passage in Ecclesiastes 2:1-11. 

Are you overfilling yourself with the things that make you happy?

Are you truly finding happiness through self-indulgence?

What type of impact are you making?

Which direction are you focusing on, and how far have you gone?

                The wisdom that Solomon tries to obtain is not the learning and knowledge that one can aspire with.  I imagine that the wisdom that is attained is actually understanding and discernment.  Where else can one try to become wise without knowing the meaning behind it?  The point here is that it is easier for frustration to build when you know more.  As much as knowledge is power, therefore problems could increase with those who do not understand that knowledge. 

                His great experience is through different perspectives of wisdom.  In this, we can correlate the message of, “I applied my heart to know wisdom and to know madness and folly” (v. 17 ESV).  I question whether he set forth to truly gain better perspective based on the self through this world.  Life and work can lead you down a road that will be difficult to answer the question on your personal existence.  The enjoyment you can find is very difficult to find when you attempt to find it for yourself.  The questions for your life still remain, unless you keep reading into this book. 

Here are some takeaways from Ecclesiastes 1:12-18. 

Where are you putting your energies in your life?

Is the path you have chosen runs in circles that you do not understand the way out?

What do you think is the true break through the complexities of life, that everything can be enjoyable?