creativity (Photo credit: smrisk)

Some people go through life without discovering the creativity that is buried inside them.  Take a look around and you will notice that creative people are usually the superstars.  One wonders why these people made it on top, but the answer is simply discovering one’s  creativity and enhancing it.  Creativity is the ability to make something new or the re-inventing of something that already exists. Contrary to popular belief, it is not inborn but developed. 

One way to enhance it is to try brainstorming, a method that attempts to produce ideas in a spontaneous manner.  Here, criticism is not encouraged.  If you’re a writer, you immediately plunge into writing, unmindful of your grammar, spelling, punctuations, or organization. Don’t worry–you can always rewrite. Your goal here is quantity, not yet quality, but the thing is: you have already a lot of ideas in your cache.

Another way is to ask questions, especially thought-provoking ones.  A question is an invitation to creativity, a beginning of a new adventure.  It prods you to think, for original thinking or seeking new answers involves a lot of creativity.

You have probably heard this saying:  Think outside the box.  In other words, you have to get out of your comfort zone.  Accepting traditional or conventional wisdom can block your creativity.  Dare to disturb customs and traditions—you have nothing to lose but your sleepy, contented, unimaginative mind.

All things considered, you can deliberately stimulate your mind.  Read a book, or write one.  Listen to a new sound, look at new sights or places.  You’ll discover that every experience, whether good or bad, stimulates creativity and personal growth.  

This place I was in, my comfort zone, became extremely lonely.  I was safe from failure, but I had no fulfillment in my life.  Every day was the same as the one before.  I was stuck in a rut, a routine that I hated, but I stayed there because I knew what to expect from it and that gave me comfort.  At that point in my life it was better to stay in that comfort zone and be miserable than to risk the heartache of failure.  I can’t do this.  I can’t do that. I can’t….I can’t….I can’t.  This became a huge part of my vocabulary and of my life.

I convinced myself that I couldn’t do things without even trying to do them.  I made excuse after excuse until I experienced the one thing I was trying to avoid…FAILURE.  I felt like a failure.  I felt that I didn’t have anything to show for my life.  I had done absolutely nothing.  I decided right then that I would rather try something and fail rather than never trying at all.

Once I made that realization I made another one.  I realized that I truly loved myself.  I have a chronic, debilitating illness-so what!  I knew I had to stop letting my illness define who I was and who I was going to be.  It was time to put my big girl panties on and walk out into the world and start chasing those dreams I had let go of.

So that’s exactly what I’m doing.  I’m a writer and that’s who I’m meant to be and this illness isn’t going to take that away from me.  It may lessen my ability to do the things I’ve always done, but I will still do them.  I will never let Fibromyalgia or anything else ever steal my dignity again.  This is exactly who I’m supposed to be and I’m perfectly happy just being me.

I am only one, but still I am one. I cannot do everything, but still I can do something; and because I cannot do everything, I will not refuse to do something that I can do.–Helen Keller

I have seen a people who were once upon a time in thralls to a master, desperation of being servants set in at a point in time; they learned to deal with their desperation, they put on their thinking caps and played around the thought of being their own masters. When time called ‘presently’ came there they were at the destination of their dreams. Their former master even admitted that the people who were once in their (the master) thralls are now in their (the people) own thrown of higher esteem.

I also saw another group of people in the same kettle of fish as the first one, but these good friends of mine broke away from their masters after desperation set in their camps only to become masters of imitating whatever their master did. They allowed desperation to steal every show. Their master saw their weakness and took advantage of this weakness and drew them, indirectly, in their thralls once again. I see that they are conscious now of their weakness. It is about time they took the bull by the horn, but I think sometimes natural disasters like when desperation set in the activities of a group they become more aware of things here and there. I pray that these good friends would realise the ethics, like how to breathe and bath, that should accompany desperation that set in amongst those savants that have matured through series of strike of desperation. I believe that, sometimes, “the swiftest traveller is he that goes afoot” so I am a little patient but very hopeful.   

There comes a time when those who wait to be waited on get up and try something like waiting on themselves and others. Sometimes people change for the love and fun and for necessity of change most often induced by desperation, followed by long breath and sometimes hot salt bath. It will start with imitation and when repeated, learning takes place and then perfection. The waiter would enjoy coaching those to be served sometimes forgetting they are on the verge of losing their jobs. I mean one should not smile when a little step up to a laugh would make the world laugh with them. What is your dream world? Whatever it is and however big it might be getting out of the comfort zone is what matters, there are people everywhere, some from nowhere, to keep you through the change. Sometimes you have to imitate in order to learn before you become perfect; but deal with desperation, as it is not likely to leave you, by taking long breaths and sometimes adding a warm salt bath and focusing carefully through the period of change.

There will still be a time when people would not imitate everything, but would do a selective imitation of things worth being imitated. Sometimes it seems forces somewhere descend on people at a certain point in time, like at the point of desperation, to make them aware of the negative and positive aspects of situations when they would be obsessed with thoughts and ideas enough for them to give hundred reasons why things ought not to be done, and hundred reasons why they should do some things. I am not expecting everyone in the group to change at the same time, but a minor within the group would do the start. I only leave them with a piece of advice from one of their own inspirational and sage elders that “either they go up for everything or they go down for anything”.

To the beloved friend I always wish you a prosperous future, and you should always heed to the advice from your faithful great elders. To the master, “most of the luxurious and many of the so-called comforts of life are not only not indispensable, but positive hindrances to the elevation of mankind”. So be careful and be fair and not mean to the people or laugh as they busily imitate almost everything. For the universe would demise the lazy idlers and will always leave those Desperate Imitators for a better fate.

Many people tend to do the things they like doing–they never go out of their orbit and lackadaisically summersault along the vast and yet untouched universe.  The road is filled with bumps and humps and it’s a tupsy turby journey for many. It is how you swiftly evade the unfamiliar coming towards you. Of course when from the longest distance you see what’s imminent you’ll be prepared wheter to go right or left, you can effortlessly reckon the clearance needed not to collide with the approaching roadblock. This can be rewarding to many while others see it as boring especially those people who likes to venture in life.

Pre-determined life, you exactly know what to expect ahead. It’s the same crow’s-flewn road you are trudging, a pelican’s melancholy existence without the needed spice to make you scrambling for comfort. In this sense, you are in full control of what’s happening around you.

You need not to go out of your comfort zone, just make sure that all the needed tools are accessible and all your guards are always on the alert if needed be then learn to anticipate the unexpected. It may not be feasible really to be successful when calm mode is not activated within you. It is stressing. Achieving something borne out of customary is somewhat more gratifying but being in your most secured senses in performing your duties–you’ll be in your most comfort zone and you’re an immobable object. 

10. Find a Way to put on Everything you Find out — Somewhat use what you find out everyday to show that to a practice instead of a desire. Accomplish this for 21 days and also the practice is actually you. Because you gather expansion in this way, create idle or lapse.

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It doesn’t matter if you are a christen, Hindu, Muslim or someone else it hardly changes anything about what you will get out of life because your lifestyle is your true religion and deep down in your subconscious you have chosen the way you are living right now as your true religion. If you don’t care about how you should spend your day and what changes you should make in your life then who else gives a sh*t about it.

Are you the person who really cares about himself? If the answer is YES then think hard. Don’t you waste time frequently or haven’t set your goals yet? Do you really take enough risks to develop yourself out of your comfort zone? What lifestyle do you really have?

Like a religion must fulfill the human deeds, your lifestyle must also serve you to the path of growth and enjoyment in your life. Consider someone who is to lazy because his subconscious feels it as a comfort zone like he is enjoying the mantras in a sacred place (for religious practices). Should he still follow the same religious to nourish himself or should he change it for good.

So let’s take a look at what lifestyle we are living with. It doesn’t mean what car you drive, what kind of house you live in, how much money you have. But we are taking about far more basic stuff here. How would you like to spend your day if you have only basic need like enough food, clothes and shelter?

You get the idea now. If you think you are holding upon a wrong lifestyle or religion may be then you need to change it because it is neither the path to God nor the path to mental, physical or spiritual growth. You need to step out of your comfort zone and practice braking and cultivating your habits. Scientists have proved that it takes 21 days to brake or make a habit if we commit sincerely about it. After the period of twenty-one days all things become easy day by day, moment by moment and this is the time where you can learn to enjoy the whole process.

I am a victim of a condition known as procrastination.  I had varied reasons for putting off things I could do now to an undetermined time in the future.  It was always there would always be tomorrow. 

Why do human beings procrastinate?  But before we go into that, let’s define what is procrastination.  Procrastination is a combination of 2 Latin words “pro” and “cras” which means “for tomorrow”.  Hence, the mindset of tomorrow would always be around is the precursor to the unhealthy habit of a procrastinator.

I watched with much sadness and horror at the calamity of the earthquake, tsunami and nuclear reactor leak in Japan.  I continue to pray for the souls of the disaster.  I cannot imagine the pain and agony if I was the only survivor when all my loved ones are not around anymore.  

I can only reflect on my weakest point as an able-soul.  I am still seating in the comfort of my home.  I still have a choice to decide if I wanted to write this article as I watched the updates of the disaster on my television.  I am in my comfort zone.  And yet I still procrastinate to get out of it. 

I am lucky to still have that choice to make a difference in my life, to the people around me and to change for the better.  I choose to master the habit of getting things done when I am supposed to.  I choose to stop procrastinating.  Procrastination was just to protect my comfort zone.  But I asked myself as I reflect on the things happening around the world today, “am I living the life I am supposed to?”  Have you, like me, been procrastinating to protect your comfort zone too?

we all have things we want, what we think can never have unless you take a step outside your comfort zones.  And honestly, that’s it, that’s how it should be the intention of doing things, and things take matters into their own hands and harmony.  Not everything will be working as you intended, if no go.  And yes!  The executor is equal to you.

One thing I learned last month, is to know where the risk is greater than the comfort zone.  When the opportunity is healthier for her hand in the bay.  And when it’s really expected a lot more than anything right now.  If a healthy and stimulating growth and unrepentant

then go to “only” category is deadly “worthy.”  Hesitation has always been an obstacle in the heart cries.  And I’m not going to say, trust your heart, rather I would say that based on his head.  Because in contrast to heart failure in a heartbeat, the brain will keep working and you have maximum control over the heart, sometimes.

it is safer to rely on the mind than the heart – because you will never regret a hasty decision, as there will be nothing.

And when I tell you to go after what you want, I’m not saying nonsense and be subject to the desires of the heart, otherwise it would be a walking contradiction.  What I mean is this: Go your own way, creating their own destiny and live their own lives, depending on your taste.  And what better way to get out of your comfort zone and trust that the world will change.

      Procrastination is defined as the deferment or postponement of tasks at a later time. Putting off doing things is actually part of being human and almost all of us procrastinate, at one time or another. We put off doing things for a variety of reasons. These reasons could range from fear of the outcome of a particular task, lacks self-confidence to do the tasks, one’s feeling that another time would be better to do it, inadequate motivation or just  feeling discourage,  anxious and stress out at the moment that we feel putting off the tasks would be so much better for our overall health.

What’s our benefit if we do things right now?

      People, who practices the do-it-now principle will definitely have better self-image, more self-confidence and lots of peace of mind. On the personal level, the do-it-now persons will enjoy more meaningful relationships with the opposite sex, with friends, family and will definitely find great fulfillment in life. For career-minded individuals, performing their responsibilities on time will give them more respect from both management and staff alike, give them more levy over procrastinators when it comes to advancement in career opportunities and would be more likely to succeed in grabbing the best deals.

What will happen if we always procrastinate?

      When we consistently defer doing things we should do, we will also fail to live up to our responsibilities and commitments, which in turn would proved to be quite damaging to us. Most common effects of procrastination would involve guilt, social disapproval, unemployment,  loss of chances & opportunities, anxiety and depression.

What are the ways in conquering Procrastination?

      When we are able to identify the cause why we always put things off, we can then have the means of finding the solutions that will allow us to take full control of our commitments and responsibilities and be able to do them on time. Here are some of the methods to help us overcome procrastination.

• This is what’s important to me.  Ascertain what’s important to you.  Ensure that the things you are engaging in are what’s  vital to you and your whole existence. Spend your time pursuing them and not the things which are just trivial to you.

• I believe I Can. Believing that you can do  anything that you can think of or that which you put your heart and mind can do, will greatly help you in your quest to conquer procrastination. Don’t believe anything negative about you or what you can do. Believe in yourself and you will find yourself that you can do it  indeed.

• Doing the Most Difficult thing first. Getting the most difficult task for the day done first  will get it out of the way and other easier tasks would just simply be so easy to tackle.  Making such difficult task at the end of the list would simply zap your energy just thinking about it and would lead you dreading the inevitable, which would definitely makes you think of deferring it to some later time when you’re more energetic and less tired.

• Have my prioritized daily to-do list. Getting organized and prioritizing a to-do list from which you will based your tasks for the day is one of the best ways to avoid procrastination. Make a to-do list and commit yourself to complete each task in accordance to the priority sequence of your list.

• Plan and Organize my projects. When you have something to big to do which requires more than an hour of your time, you should break it down to manageable segments. When you have identified all  individual components, arrange them into a logical priority sequence and then you’re ready to commence your activities.

• Learn to push myself outside my comfort zone. Sometimes, we have to go beyond our comfort zone to be able to learn that we can do a particular thing. It enables us to do things we never thought we’re capable of doing. As Dale Carnegie said, “Do the thing you fear to do and keep on doing it… that is the quickest and surest way ever yet discovered to conquer fear.”

• Be my number 1 fan.  Sometimes, we just have to take matters into our own hands. We can’t wait for others to motivate us to do something we know we should do but just not wanting to do it. We should encourage ourselves. After doing something, which we did not feel like doing, we should congratulate ourselves. Cheer yourself to continue the good work.

• Commit our self to conquer procrastination. If we really want to overcome procrastination to improve our personal as well as professional life, and have a better self-image, we should commit ourselves to becoming a procrastination-hater and be a Do-It Now individual. We should command and conquer procrastination.

Our Challenge

      We should not let ourselves be a member of the secretive society of procrastinators. Secretive since nobody would really want to be identified as someone who always put off doing things and society since there are so many people who procrastinate out there who might as well form a society for such. The definition of procrastination might be simple but don’t be deceived into thinking that the solution to it would also be simple. For a lot of people, it is not as simple as doing things which we know we should do.

      We should set aside quality time thinking about our reasons why we procrastinate, the problems that led from it and what to do about it. It would be a good idea if we document, put into writing our reasons, the problems, our own formulated solutions and our commitment to overcome procrastination. It would not be an easy task, but if we really push ourselves to strive harder to do the things we should do at the time that we should do it, coupled with our determination to succeed, we would be able to do it. Since procrastination can have devastating consequences, it would be for the best  if we start action today. Right here and now, let’s start working on conquering our procrastination.

      Have you had problems with procrastination? What have  you done to overcome it? Maybe you could share some of your most effective methods in conquering it. It would be much appreciated.

Sometimes we get into relationships and we find ourselves, not extremely happy at least not the way we were when things first began. He is a good man, and that’s all that matters. Both men and women get relaxed in relationships after they have been in for a certain period of time. Often people stop doing the things they were doing in the beginning, because they have already won you over. It’s not always intentional, but there is always room for improvement. You don’t want to get stuck in that comfort zone, where things are just OK. You want to feel great, and the feeling should be reciprocated. Don’t feel like you are crossing boundaries or asking for too much if you tell your man exactly what you want,need and expect in the relationship you are trying to build.

Intimacy

You can deny it all you want, but every one us enjoy the feeling of intimacy. After all you are in a relationship aren’t you? Women want to feel like they are close to their man, like he is always wanting to get closer. We want those kisses, when we first see you for the day, we want a hug sometimes for no apparent reason. Your woman wants you to give her a quick call just to see how her day is going, and maybe send her the occasional I miss you text or I can’t wait until tonight.

More often than not it is the little things that you do for your woman that make her feel like you always have her in mind, and that you are taking that extra step to make her feel that she is special to you.

Love

We don’t just want you to utter the four letter word, we want you to show us that you LOVE. It is a very true statement that actions speak louder than words. If your words and your actions don’t equal out. There is definitely a problem.

It comes down to the fact that we want to know that we know that you love us are in love with us. We don’t want to have to think about it and wonder if you really love us the way you say you do.

If you say it mean it,

Sex

Yes women want sex just as much as you men do. We don’t just want the sex, we want the foreplay that should be coming along with it. This is very helpful in getting us in the mood and helps us feel a sense of closeness with you, so we do get all hot and steamy and are ready to fulfill your needs as you fulfill ours.

We want you to remember that we have way more than only one or two spots on our body that you can stimulate. We want you to take your time and make us yearn for you from the top of our head to the souls of our feet.

Remember if you do good onto us we will do good unto you SATISFACTION GUARANTEED!

Support

Who doesn’t want support? We need to know that you have our backs! That you are there for us as we make life choices, have problems at work, with our friends and family, basically with all that goes on in our lives.

This does not mean we want to whine to you or hire you as our shrink, we just want to know that when the time comes we know that you will be caring, empathetic, able to help put a smile on our face. It’s not always about having a whole lot to say, sometimes it’s just about knowing that you are there when needed.

Trust

If we can’t trust you, we might as well end the relationship right now!! because if we don’t have trust, we don’t have anything!!

I don’t think anything else is needed to be said for that

Remember Special Occasions

I can’t speak for all women but as for myself, I can cut you a little slack if you don’t remember the date of the first time we went shopping together, or the name of the movie we went to see on our 5th date.

However, it would be great if you can remember birthdays, holidays, and anniversaries. We don’t need to get all technical with the 3 months since we first did this or that. If you can remember the main things you are doing well in my eyes.

If you are treating us properly all year round, then things like this are not a big deal, but just an added bonus to show us that we are special to you.

Bottom Line

The bottom line is we want to feel like you are making an effort to be close to us, we want your love to be displayed in more ways than just words. It is important for us to be able to be with you and know that we are the one you desire to be with.