Why a Man Recognizes One Woman as Relationship Material and Another as Just a “Fling”

Men think of women as relationship material – or a “cool girl” – when they see that a woman understands something that other women can’t even see going on.

“Cool girls” exude positive emotional energy that men can relate to. And they’re “naturally” the kind of women who every man is inexplicably drawn to, even if they don’t look like a supermodel.

Here’s a list of what “cool girls” DON’T DO:

• Cool Girls DON’T exaggerate about what’s going on around them or what a man’s doing, unless they’re doing it as a joke or to make fun of a man in a playful way
• Cool Girls DON’T say everything that they’re feeling and experiencing. They think before they speak
• Cool Girls DON’T mention bad situations, issues or problems from the past unless it’s a total “must” or extremely important and they haven’t been able to talk about it yet. They find the right time for them AND their man to talk. Otherwise, Cool Girls live in the present moment
• Cool Girls DON’T try to FORCE a man to talk about his feelings. They know that it will only backfire and he’ll think she’s being needy and he’ll close off

What Makes a Woman a “Cool Girl” in a Man’s Mind

In fact, it’s typical for most men to react with withdrawal or frustration to a woman who demonstrates these types of behavior.

So, let’s keep talking about some of the important personality traits when it comes to creating ATTRACTION with a man and growing towards something deeper.

Here’s a few of the “cool girl” Dos:

• Cool girls choose not to complain or talk about things for too long that are not other people’s responsibility or impossible for anyone to solve given the current situation
• Cool girls bring funny, positive thoughts and feelings to situations to create an experience that men will want to have again and again
• Cool girls are willing to go with the flow when it comes to social things but make assertions when they have opinions and ideas
• Cool girls have options and things to do that keep them satisfied so they don’t feel like they’re left out if they’re not invited to something (And even if they do, they certainly don’t complain about it or even mention it – they FIND something to do that makes them happy.)
• Cool girls prefer that a man makes up his own mind; they don’t try to make a man do something
• Cool girls DO know that the way they feel and talk about themselves is how men will feel about them

So, are YOU a “cool girl?”

Are you the kind of woman that men are “naturally” drawn to and want to be with… for more than just a fling?

And do you get how to say all the right things verbally and non-verbally to let him know that you’re the kind of girl he’d like to connect with and fall in love with?

What made me write about it… what is the reason behind these phrases?

You meet someone and you like them, you date, you fall in love, till here everything is going smooth. The rough path starts when you move to next step of “falling in love”, you decide to get married.

Wow! Congratulations, All the best to the couples, You both make a wonderful pair are some phrases that you will hear in that particular time duration.

Now you get married. “Just Married”, honeymoon time. Once this Honeymoon time gets over, you will be facing nothing very different from what others did. The only point is, no one shared it when you were getting married.

Cover of Just Married

From here the rest of the article will be for and from a girl’s perspective.

You just got married, now at home, after a sweet night you woke up and enter kitchen! Huh! Nobody told you, that is a must. You have to enter kitchen and cook, as its said “a way to your man’s heart is through his stomach”. A thought may strike you, “your man’s heart” ,why I need a way there now? I am already there, that’s how I got married.. Right?

Wrong, absolutely wrong. Here is the eye opener, you will never enter his heart and you will always stay in that “way to his heart” ,all your life, cooking for him.

Also, when dealing with couple sex issues, many a times we read, “he finds you most sexy, while you are cooking for him” . So yet again, one more reason to cook is ,so he finds you sexy!

Image via Wikipedia

I feel I enjoy any work when I am not pressurized for it. I may like cooking but after listening, reading so many points, it sounds like someone is compelling me to cook and that I don’t like. But now there is no choice, I am married, I have to do this else when my man leaves me for someone else, I might hear him say, “tell me, how many times have you cooked for me in past few days”. OH! I will like a better excuse then that to get “single again”.

So if you are in love and want to remain the same way for years to come, start cooking.

Liking someone, dating, loving someone, even flings , and marriage, all will remain same in your life, only if you cook!

If a man cooks, he is so sweet! If he don’t ,its just fine.

If women cooks, whats a news in it, its her responsibility, if a women don’t cook, she is simply lazy and the one who don’t care about the relationships.

TV reality shows like America’s Next Top Model and American Idol area great in my opinion. Although it almost provides almost unfair pavements for those in the pursuit of a modeling career, they can enter a competition with a level of rigor that is far less than the real modeling or music industries, for that matter. However, there are just some aspects of life that one cannot have a more advantageous route, and that is love. That brings you to my point of discussion. Do people nowadays seriously think that by calling in 25 sexy men or women, they will all just happen to fall in love with the same person?

I think that there is definitely an element of competition, which degrades the universality of love. Does it not occur to the guy/girl hosting the competition that the element of competition almost degrades the value of love that the show attempts to promote? How about dating 25 guys/girls at the same time? When a guy is consciously unresponsive to the ‘love of his life’ dating a bunch of equally hot men, or even better looking? Whenever I turn on the TV and The Bachelor or The Bachelorette is on, I just walk away. My attention should be expended on something far less ‘dodgy’ and superficial. One prime example of that is the 6th season of The Bachelorette. She left her perfect guy (after the series) for a job, despite the ‘hardship’ of their journey (*cough cough* the elimination of retarded men, who are desperate to get a wife), and in the end, she gets another series dedicated to her, with a fresh bunch of men. I mean, SERIOUSLY? Not only to criticize the original concept of it, the show itself is exceedingly repetitive. I mean come on, 2 seasons devoted to an overly spoiled woman and man, who do not comprehend the very first thing about love.

There are definitely opposing perspectives in regards to this particular topic. With my belief that things do change of the course of time, it is slightly hypocritical of me to not apply this concept with love. With the creation of various unorthodox methods (such as online dating and late night infomercials) to find love, I suppose the show has a point. Nevertheless, this is by no means, means that I do not condemn the show. There are certain things in life that needs alterations in order to suit the modern world. However, there are also certain things that exist to sustain the balance between what is old and new. I think that love is one of the things that shall not be taken lightly, and it certainly cannot be found via a TV show. I mean, PLEASE!

Usually, it starts from friendship. You get to be introduced, meet often, having common friends, going to same parties, similar gathering to attend to and the like. You get to know each other very well that you go to group dates and eventually you go out just the two of you, just a friendly date.

This relationship is not complicated, though you have an understanding, you don’t get to ask questions and demand to that person. It’s like you just look into each others eyes and there’s magic, you’re not just sure if it’s love or just pure infatuation.

You enjoy each others company so much but the world doesn’t know about it. It’s just between the two of you, you say you’re just friends but it’s with different benefits.

It’s a difficult situation though; you can’t ask if he/she is involved to another person, you can’t even ask if what your relationship status is. All you can say is that you’re happy when you’re together and that’s what is important right now. When it will end, you just won’t know. It’s because from the start, you’re not certain on where are you going to.

How can you handle this circumstance? I’m still not sure how to respond. Experiencing it is fun, intimate and memorable. It adds color to life, but it’s dangerous at times too. It’s like you’re assuming that something’s going on with you because of the unusual attention you’re giving to each other, that you’re expecting that it might grow to something deeper but it all sums up to so many questions and worries. It’s really not advisable to be into this kind of association, many people might get confused, you may hurt another persons feelings as well. It lacks honestly, trust and commitment which are essential aspects when you’re in a special relationship. You’re not even sure if there is love between the two of you or just special friendship.

Life is really mysterious; you get involved with different types of people. But for sure, you get to learn from every experience and having someone as a fling gives you inspiration to be a better person when you get into a relationship. It’s still healthier if it’s clear between the two of you on what you really are into. As of now, I try to avoid get involved into having a fling as much as possible.