Image via Wikipedia

Image via Wikipedia

“You know that feeling when your heart breaks for the first time– and your lover just walks away. Being bashed because you’re gay is like having your heart broken before you got the chance to love and be loved in return. We put walls up and let others write our tale while we suffer in silence, drenched in the hater’s guilt. Until one day, we snap. We discover we are innocent! We knock on the door waiting for an answer. We dare you to open our door without question like we have opened ourselves, completely vulnerable to your judgments. Because its our turn to speak and we will– loud and proud!”

If gay people want to get married, or get together, they should have a civil partnership. The word ‘marriage,’ I think, puts a lot of people off.You get the same equal rights that we [he and his partner] do when we have a civil partnership. Heterosexual people get married. We can have civil partnerships.

(Source: USAToday.com, November 13, 2008)

The response by many in the online community was to denounce Sir Elton as insensitive and out of touch with the ways discrimination affects many GLBT people. Many felt that as a gay man–and a celebrity–he had an obligation to fully denounce Proposition 8. Yet one respondent remarked that she was a lesbian who agreed with Sir Elton and wished the GLBT movement would stop assuming every GLBT person wants the right to marry.

Leaving aside the merits of Sir Elton’s opinion (for the record, I disagree; I think separation implies inferiority), people’s response to his comments brings up some important questions for the GLBT community: namely, whether agreement on the marriage issue (or any aspects of the rights movement) is a necessary prerequisite for being accepted by the community and how to handle divisions within the community as we continue to push for equal rights. Relatedly, do GLBT celebrities have greater obligations towards the community because of their position?

First and foremost, I do not believe that all GLBT persons have to agree on equality issues or any other issues. Clearly one’s sexual orientation is determined by which gender(s) s/he is attracted to, not hir political opinions. Furthermore, it is not to the rights movement’s advantage to alienate members of the community who disagree. To do so only makes enemies out of a portion of the community and implies that the rights movement is an exclusive club. This type of division is what our true enemies–committed homophobes–would love to see among us, because it weakens our strength.

It is important to be able to bridge disagreements such as these. I have no doubt that the majority of GLBT persons desire equal treatment, but not everyone agrees on the form that treatment would take or the way to get there. By focusing on what both sides of the debate (within the community) have in common, it is more likely that we will be able to stay unified as we progress towards the goal of equality.

How, then, to handle such divisions? I think there are several important principles to keep in mind:

• Not everyone needs to be active in every aspect of the movement. We can and should follow Harvey Milk’s example and try to recruit people to the rights movement. However, some of our recruitment efforts will be met with solid No’s from certain individuals. Those individuals should never be denigrated for their attitude.
• When discussing issues within the community, focus on shared goals (i.e. equality) and present your ideas as a means of reaching that goal. Remember that almost everyone wants the same basic things… use what you have in common as a starting point for discussion.
• Realize there are many paths to the same goal, and be open to input from people you disagree with. This, of course, refers to people who share the same basic goal (i.e. within the community), not to those who are actively seeking to destroy us. In any case, there’s truth to be found even in points of view you virulently disagree with; try to take what you can out of every discussion and use it to move us towards our goal.

I think my answer to the question of celebrity obligations should be obvious, given the preceding discussion. Celebrities, just like everyone else, may or may not agree with any aspect of the GLBT rights movement. They have the right to voice their opinions–and to have what they actually said be heard.

No one person, celebrity or otherwise, should ever be considered “the voice of the GLBT movement”. The movement is made up of people, plain and simple. We come from all walks of life, we hold all sorts of ideals and beliefs. That’s the whole reason we want equal rights; we don’t want to be treated as anything other than human.

Of course, some people are going to assume a gay celebrity, especially one of high stature such as Elton John, does speak for the entire community. That’s why it’s important to keep stating our opinions, even when–or perhaps especially when–they contradict a public figure’s opinion. It is equally important to do so with respect. The people who responded to Sir Elton’s comments with personal attacks did little to gain credibility for the movement.

In conclusion: as we continue to move towards equality, let’s not forget who we are. Let the LGBT community be one made up of many different types of people.

Equality for all requires freedom to dissent.