Most people at some point in their lives have had to put up with something called unrequited love. This is where you have feelings for somebody who doesn’t feel the same way for you. This can be hard but you don’t have to live your life this way. There are many things you can do to move on which will improve your life overall.

Number 1 – Ask the person out

This may not apply to everybody. Some teenagers have a low self esteem and so may just assume somebody doesn’t like them back because they don’t think they’re attractive enough. (These are irrational thoughts, every human being is beautiful for some reason or another and there is definitely somebody out there who will find you attractive.) It’s dangerous to make an assumption so you should at least make a move first. If you were wrong and the person does like you then that’s great, the love is reciprocated but if not, move on. Do not keep asking somebody out in the hopes that they will change their mind as it won’t.

Number 2 – Think about what your feelings for them actually are

Do you really love them or is it just lust? Some people easily get confused between these two complex emotions. An easier way of looking at it is do you like them mostly for their appearance or do you like them for their personality and how they are beyond that? If it’s the former, you’re experiencing lust and if it’s latter, it could very well be love. If you can tell yourself that your feelings are lust then it may be easier for you to move on. If you think that you are in love with that person then you must reason with yourself.

Number 3 – Persuade yourself that you deserve better

This is a tricky one. You need to be able to tell yourself that you as a human being deserve the love and company of somebody who feels the same way about you. If you truly believe that you deserve a better person that is more suited to you then you’re more likely to move on. Think about it, wouldn’t you be so much happier in a relationship with somebody you are compatible with rather than in a relationship with somebody who doesn’t have the same connection with you?

Number 4 – Surround yourself with other people

You must learn that you’re an independent person. You do not need anybody else to survive and get on with your life. You can get by just fine without them. Instead of pining after them, hang out with friends or spend some time with family instead. You can always take up a new hobby or join a club. Not only will you be distracting yourself and possibly having fun without the person, but you may meet somebody new in the process and they might just be compatible for you. Don’t go out seeking love because everybody is single at some point in their life. It’s important to learn how to be single because you might just enjoy it as there are many liberties you don’t realise you have until you’re taken. Many people find that they found love when they weren’t even looking for it. This definitely takes the pressure off as well as meaning you like somebody for who they are and not because you’re desperate for a partner.

Number 5 – Accept that you can be friends

This one may be a difficult one and should only be taken on if you’re completely confident you’re ready to move on and you won’t fall for them again. Treat them as your friend. Hang out in a gang. Don’t flirt with them. Learn to see them as they see you. This is especially good if you fell for them because they had a quality you found particularly great such as being a good listener. This means that they’ll make a good friend and you’ll be able to talk easily. This last step is best carried out once you are fully over the person. You may even be able to laugh about it later.

So there we have it, five steps to moving on and getting over that unrequited love. Sometimes it’s hard to find the strength to move on but it’s important that you learn that once you have got past this difficult stage in your life, you can be happy once again. All it takes is the understanding that as long as you want things you can’t have, you’re always going to be happy because you’re not allowing yourself to take the things you could have. I wish you all the best of luck and I hope everything turns out for the best.

It will be rather cumbersome to state which one of the aforesaid sins dominate the young generation now and to what extent but yes, the most common is certainly ‘anger’  believed to be fun loving that people get besotted with and enjoy. Why does one get annoyed over trivial issues and then go back and lick the wounds when the anger has subsided? This proves that ‘anger’ is definitely a subject of pleasure – one enjoys repeating this over and again like devouring a sumptuous feast until the next one comes by. Very frequently affected by this emotion are today’s couples who do not trust their relationship and before the final break up ‘anger’ is exercised to seek pleasure to offend, slander and hurt.

 It might just seem that the present generation has put the seven deadly sins out of their minds due to the busy schedule they have got engrossed into. But the fact of the matter is, it still prevails and takes over their daily lives. Take for instance sloth which would generally mean not doing enough or being less useful happens to be a daily routine. The Gen Y although pretend to be busy most of the time, but are in reality, engaged in doing all the wrong things. Given a serious thought, sloth would mean not prioritizing activities. This may not be a big deal but the existence of sloth is so prevalent and the sin being attempted regularly.

Is the Gen Y free of greed? Most certainly not……my colleague has bigger car so I must buy a car to outsmart him/her. Greed overtakes at every step and every minute of the day. Someone has bought a stunning red dress so I must also buy one irrespective whether it would look good on me or not. You choose to eat at a restaurant where the portion served is larger and guess what? Half the food is wasted. The present generation is not only looking for more but seeking more to waste. Greed has definitely not diminished, the want for materialistic things on the contrary has increased with more and more progress in technology that is on offer.

So much for greed, but lust has also not forsaken us. Lust as described in the Bible is “a shameful sin, a crime that should be punished”. Looking at a woman with lust is as good as committing adultery. So, is paying compliment to another man’s wife not a nice thing to do? But this happens all the time. For a man or even a woman, the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. This desire of possessing other people’s entity is definitely lust and a total taboo but no one can avoid this sin.

Likewise, envy and pride also govern our life in a major manner. Why are we envious of the next door neighbor of having a better home, car and other materialistic things? Today even the siblings are envious of one another for faring better in the school/college but no effort is made to better oneself. We are often too proud to acknowledge out faults and say sorry to our friends, family and colleagues.  Finally gluttony, as the Bible explains is a misplaced desire of food or it’s withholding from the needy. Gluttony is an excessive desire to consume more than what one requires. The root of gluttony is believed to be lack of self control and therefore today’s generation is greatly affected by this vice because they do not have enough control on themselves. Given the choice, the Gen Y would declare that they have greater control, just because they do what they want to do and therefore are in control but this is not true. Being stubborn is not being in control but simply means not understanding/respecting other’s views.

However, the seven deadly sins that seem to have become even more deadly is still an integral part of our life. If we were less affected, so much of unwanted hostility and carnage from within and outside would not have occurred.

In the beginning of a relationship everything is always perfect. The person you are dating is perfect, everything they say and do is perfect. But what happens you realize they are not perfect, and at times can actually be quite irritating? Do you end the relationship or understand that you are not perfect either and I am sure you can be just as irritating?

It is only with time that true loves comes to be. You can not be with someone a month and honestly think you are in love with them. That is ridiculous! When you have been with someone for years and still miss them when they walk out the door, that is true love. When you have a disagreement, and even as much as you dislike them in that moment, you could not imagine being with anyone else. That is love. When y’all are at your lowest point in life, broke, unable to pay bills, struggling just to get what you need, and you can look at the other person and know that one day things will get better. That is love.

Love is not just something that happens, it is something that has to be worked at. It does not come easy. it takes a willingness to stick by someones side no matter how rough the road gets,and it will get rough at times. 

Those are the differences between lust and love, so if you read this and have to ask yourself “Do I really love the person I am with?” then chances are the answer is no. 

If you enjoyed reading this you might also enjoy

http://socyberty.com/sexuality/sex-and-relationships-pt-4-infidelity/

http://beyondjane.com/family/marriage/how-to-keep-your-marriage-alive/

http://socyberty.com/relationships/restoring-trust-in-a-relationship/

http://healthmad.com/mental-health/why-are-people-settling-for-less/

http://socyberty.com/sexuality/sex-and-relationships-pt-3/

http://socyberty.com/sexuality/sex-and-relationships-pt-2/

http://socyberty.com/relationships/sex-and-relationships-2/

Firstly, he may not have admitted to it because he didn’t think that you would ever find out. In some ways this almost makes sense – if you don’t need to be hurt, he is not going to. Unfortunately you obviously did find out which means that his plan didn’t go quite as he expected but at the same time, he was trying to spare your feelings!

The second reason why he may not admit that he betrayed you is because the “other woman” didn’t mean anything. What is the point in destroying a completely happy relationship for the sake of a drunken mistake? Sometimes these things happen and although they are not to be proud of, no hurt was intended.

The last reason that we are going to look at is that it actually gives the girlfriend or wife the upper hand and let’s face it; no man wants that! Every fight that you ever had would be finished with the “you cheated” card and it would be used in every occasion that she didn’t get her own way.

At the end of the day, as much as you want to hate him for what he did to you, the reason he never told was to keep your heart from breaking. If he really wanted to be that much of a (insert whichever word here) he would have just told you, right?

   1. IT CAN BE USED FOR RESEARCH  – This elaborates more and helps users of the internet service to acquire useful information to help them in their dealings. It helps students to acquire academical knowledge, bankers to know more about new ideas and methods on how to use the latest accounting softwares and the like to help manage peoples business. Doctors can use the internet to stream and watch a video on an impending operation and how they should go about it in order to make a successful operation which saves human lives.

   2. IT HELPS FOR EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION  – Gone were the days where people used telegrams which took 2-4 months to reach the destined place and get a reply. With the use of internet and most especially with reference to chatting and social networking sites such as twitter, skype, facebook, qeep and so on and so fort, people chat and make friends all over the world. Through the use of electronic mail, individuals send and receive valuable information and messages anytime,anywhere within splits of seconds.

    3. IT SERVES AS A FUNBASE -This is where people most  especially kids download games, videos, and information with references to good quality content not just anything but things of non-explicit nature. These things help them and improves on their thinking abilities which helps them more often to be familiar with the keys on the keyboard as well as things with regards to softwares and hardwares.

     4. IT SERVES AS AN EYE OPENER – The internet opens our eyes to so many things covering the world. You get the latest news updates, stream them live and people even watch live soccer, football and the latest news as it happens in and around the world. It keeps us up to date with changing trends in thE communities, cities, countries and the world at large.

         This part of the use of the internet is very useful for humans in every way possible.

The things outlined here shows how the internet can be a bad master to you.

   Firstly, IT CREATS ADDICTION -  The use of the internet more often whether for finding latest updates or not, creats addiction in its use. Addiction defined by me through my own researches states addiction as a habit where the individual opts and is willing to stop but is unable to do so. A lot of people who crosses streets, or are in the classroom, in the lecture room are playing with their phones, whether games or are on a social networking site surfing their hands out. This form of addiction results in poor performances by students in class, poor performances of employees in business companies and organisations which creats a huge loss for them, thereby putting the assertion maximising profits by minimizing costs at a standstill.

   2. IT SHOWS THINGS OF EXPLICIT NATURE -  Things of explicit are written on it 18 and above but most often times they forget they are not in other peoples rooms. Explicit things constitute naked pictures, movies, to a long run and in a nutshell PORNOGRAPHY. It has come to my notice that children between the ages of 12-20 years surf the internet daily. The stage where  your hormones starts to drive you wild starts from this face of life. At this stage children both boys and girls begin to have strong sexual preferences and strong passion for the opposite sex. Children result to the use of internet to help them see some naked boys and girls which will make them happy. As this thing continues the children become used to it. With this it paves the to MASTURBATION and as it persists it may lead to homosexuality, lesbianism and the instances where some individual have sex with animals because of a hightened level of sexual feeling- LUST. It also leads to the spread of so many diseases both chronic and deadly . Does these names ring a bell, HIV , SYPHILLIS , GONNORHOEA. Yes I know they do and you should be wary of them because having sex just because you want  to have sex can be an easy way to acquire this disease.

     3. IT CAUSES DISTRACTION – Thinking of a reply to a message you sent yesterday can cause you a massive distraction. Imagine watching an adult movie(pornographic movie) and going to class,when sitting there you sometimes picture all the girls naked. At night when sleeping you have a feeling of having sex with someone. You are almost all the time thinking of sex or picturing girls who you meet in the road sides naked. This does not help you contribute well in class resulting in low performance in your educational setup. You are also likely to become a womanizer if you don’t take care.

      4. IT INCREASE YOUR EXPENDITURE LEVELS ESP. FOR KIDS – Kids who use the internet more than anything in this world can actually attest to the fact that it forms a major part of their expenditure levels. They don’t get the time to eat and learn and any money income they acquire goes into their surfing patterns and therefore leaves them with few money to spend on their personal terms and things.

    I hope people would understand the use of the internet more properly so that it can enhance their cooperating skills which would help especially teenagers to be useful citizens to their respective countries.

For the guys out there, you must have heard the phrase – “Hell hath no fury than a woman scorned” and never is this truer the case than with our modern feisty women that we love to hate and hate to love! Just remember that she knows things about you that you might not want released to the general public such as those photos of you wearing makeup as a laugh or the weird sound you make in the bedroom! Girls can be nasty, fickle creatures and if you are going to cross them, you better be prepared!

Of course, guys can be fickle creatures as well but generally they will be less nasty than their female counterparts. A guy that has been cheated on will more likely want to save face among his friends and therefore do his crying in public and his back biting about you in the pub with all of the lads about him. Of course, if you were silly enough to let him take photos of you in compromising positions, you maybe should ask for them back or at least delete them from his phone or laptop if you get the chance otherwise you could find yourself posted on a million and one websites for everyone to see!

The best thing is, of course, not to cheat on your partner but if you are going to make the decision to jump into bed with someone else, at least make sure that your other half won’t find out and if they do, that they don’t have any dirt to dish on you!

If you have already done the deed, felt bad about it but were sensible enough to make sure that your other half could never find out about your bad behavior, you really have nothing to worry about. What she doesn’t know won’t hurt her right? Just think about what would happen if you did tell her – she could break up with you and you don’t want that. She could make your life hell for a long time and you certainly don’t want that. OK, honesty is the best policy but is it really the best policy right now?

Not telling your other half about the bad behavior that you displayed doesn’t mean that you can do it again and again. In fact, if anything, it should persuade you to travel in the completely opposite direction; learn from your mistake, brush it under the carpet and prey that it never comes up and get on with your life and your relationship!

The first reason that you might be getting married is because the girl you are with is a winner with your family. The thing is do you two get on as much as you would like? Do you have the same interests and hobbies? Do you enjoy spending time together? If the answer is no, you are getting married for the wrong reasons!

Have you been dating for so many years now that you are practically married already? It is a good thing that you have lasted this long but is there a reason why you haven’t popped the question before? If she really was the one girl that you are planning on keeping forever, why have you waited this long to make an honest woman out of her? It might seem like the next step but is it the right one?

The final reason that you might want to get married and believe it or not actually applies to both men and women is because everyone else is doing it. Have you heard your friends talk about nothing apart from how good married life is? Perhaps their gushing about happiness and commitment is making you realize that there is something missing from your life. If this is the case and you think to yourself that the girl you are with “will do for now” then you are getting married for the biggest wrong reason there is!

The thing with dating a love rat and to be more precise, being cheated on by a love rat is that they don’t do it to upset you, they do it because they can and they think they can get away with it. When you confront him, you are more likely to have him running to the hills, avoiding commitment and any sort of confrontation that it might take to improve the relationship. To be completely honest, confronting a man like this is going to be more harm to you than good and you are not going to get anywhere.

Most girls love a love rat simply because they see him as a challenge; they think that they are the one girl to change him. The reality of the matter is, if he is still being his love rat self, you haven’t changed him and you are not the girl for him! Rather than standing there crying and shouting, it is possibly a better idea to take a deep breath and walk away with your head held high and your dignity still intact!

There are so many reasons as to why betrayals occur within partnerships and the first way to decide where the relationship itself will head from this point on wards is to sit down and talk. Does your partner want to be with you still? Why did he or she cheat on your in the first place? It can be very hard to ask these questions and to deal with the answers that you are given but if you want to make the relationship work, this is a necessity.

Although cheating does not have to mean the end of a relationship, it does mean that a lot of hard work, compromise and effort are going to be needed in order to fix the relationship so to speak. The partner that cheated will need a lot of patience – the journey is going to be a rough one. The cheating is likely to be brought up in many fights and it is going to take a lot of persuasion, reassurance and love to make sure that the other partner knows that it will not happen again. For the person within the relationship that was cheated on, the trust issue is going to be a very real one for a long time and can take an awful lot of time to get over.