Obviously the cosmos has a sense of humor, just mentally picture the platypus and you have life summed up in a nutshell. Now we need to add another dimension to the humor and sexual combination, age. Not everyone can be a playboy bunny or male underwear model in their twenties but we all seem to be having sex anyway, are our social norms getting way too out of control? It seems to be very beneficial to use humor to open discussions on subjects so why not look at the most accepted form of sensitive topic expression in our culture, what does our comedic movie selections show us about ourselves?

Plenty, there are  a few movies that come to mind; The Full Monty, Meet the Fockers, RED, Something’s Gotta Give, As Good As It Gets, and, Calendar Girls. Not to mention the mid-life crisis shows like; Menopause, the Musical and Mid-Life, the Crisis Musical. We are living longer than ever before and our comedy, our romance, our very lives will have to reflect the transition with the grace and style that our humorous sides can muster. The image of sex will have to adapt or else our later years will forever be considered dull in comparison. Not everyone will be in their twenties or thirties when they have sex, forties and beyond are gaining momentum so unless you intend to have a blindfold on and earplugs in during sexual encounters when mid-life hits, learn how to laugh at yourself and find a way to bring laughter into the bedroom.

Dullness is a topic that has no merit; as we age our ability to juggle more and more, and the intricacies of our relations, interactions and environments become more dynamic. Therefore, to celebrate every gray hair, to feel comfort in knowing that your face and body doesn’t necessarily have to be wrinkle-free or scar-free, to be able to find the magic in the imperfections of the moments instead of waiting for the perfect time and event to come along are all signs of aging gracefully. Don’t just find the beauty in what we have been told is the exclusive form of beauty; don’t buy into a single body type or age for intimate interactions. Women are average size 14, being 5’4” weigh about 163lbs. Men average 36 pant size being about 5’9” and weigh about 190 lbs. What does this mean? If you think you will ever have an intimate relationship you might want to look beyond the model size and age for something closer to home and more accessible. If you ever just want to be happy you might want to loosen up on the perfectionism and go for a real person who might make you laugh. Average ages throughout the world vary; the US-77 to 80, Europe between 77 to over 80 (these numbers may vary depending on where you get your stats). Life would be very constraining if it were expected that our mid-life to elderly were to stop being intimate past a certain age, don’t really see such a policy to be enforced or adhered to.  

Okay, all the teenagers can take their hands off their eyes now and all the twenty-somethings can unplug their ears…

The greatest quotes seem to be those that are unscripted and unrehearsed, ad libbed and off the cuff, if you like. It also helps to be famous to be remembered for those few little words.

If you do make it to the quotation hall of fame you will be in the company of a group of luminaries as diverse as Shakespeare, Mae West, François Voltaire, Ralph Waldo Emerson and John F. Kennedy.

A good quote appears to be comical, inspirational, philosophical or observational or it can even be a good way of executing a ‘put down’, so if anyone could combine all these themes in one quote they really have got it made.

These themes are put to good use in the following quotations.

Groucho Marx. (Julius Henry Marx. 1890 – 1977)

• “Marriage is a wonderful institution, that is of course if you like living in an institution.”                                    
•  “I find television very educational. The minute somebody turns it on, I go to the library and read a good book.”

• “I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it.”

• “I drink to make other people interesting.”

• “Women should be obscene and not heard.”

Spike Milligan. (Terence Alan Milligan. 1918 – 2002)

• “You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all the people some of the time, which is just long enough to be president of the United States.”

• “Money can’t buy you happiness, but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.”

• “I’m not afraid of dying, I just don’t want to be there when it happens.”

• “Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion.”

• “Many people die of thirst but the Irish are born with one.”

• “Chopsticks are one of the reasons the Chinese never invented custard.”

Oscar Wilde. (Oscar Fingal O’Flahertie Wills Wilde. 1854 – 1900)

• “I love acting. It is so much more real than life.”

• “America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between.”

• “Always forgive your enemies, nothing annoys them so much.”

• “Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.”

• “A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal.”

Abraham Lincoln. (1809 – 1865)

• “You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time, but you can not fool all of the people all of the time.”

• “That this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom, and that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.”

• “Let us have faith that right makes might; and in that faith let us to the end, dare to do our duty as we understand it.”

Mark Twain. (Samuel Langhorne Clemens 1835 – 1910)

• “I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.”

• “It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog.”

• “Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been.”

• “The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don’t want, drink what you don’t like, and do what you’d rather not.”

Winston Churchill. (Sir Winston Leonard Spencer-Churchill 1874 – 1965)

• “Never in the field of human conflict was so much owed by so many to so few.”

• “I have nothing to offer but blood, toil, tears and sweat.”

• “The greatest lesson in life is to know that even fools are right sometimes.”

• “A fanatic is one who can’t change his mind and won’t change the subject.”

• “The greatest lesson in life is to know that even fools are right sometimes.”

As in life, I’ll let a woman have the last word. This was said to me by a woman, not famous for her comic genius, my ex-wife. It went on to be used as a family quote.

I was living at Gravesend in Kent, on the south bank of the River Thames and worked at Tilbury in Essex, which is situated on the north bank. My journey to work involved a short commute on the ferry across the river. For some reason on this particular day, in the days before the ATM and after one of our frequent spats, I found myself with no ready cash, so I asked my wife if I could borrow some money to pay for the ferry fare.

Without pondering on the request she replied “No. You think that you’re God, walk across!”

So you see, if she had the ability to come up with a memorable quote, there is hope for all of us!

People like Oscar Wilde were reported to have said that he came from the gutter but was able “to reach for the stars.” This was because he came from a simple background and yet was able to gain notoriety even though he was not born into riches. There may also have been a reference to his being gay and he was still able to reach towards the stars having gained respect of certain playgoers, writers of his day and people who regarded him well for his penmanship and not for his sexual orientation. He was known for his sense of self-esteem, which would not be shot down because of people who were uncomfortable with his love choices. He also referred to the fact that his penman ship would be no different because of who and how he kept company with people.

Another person to be respected was Mae West who was well known for her risqué statements some more popular than others. Her reference to being overlooked meant that it was better that a woman be looked at from head to foot or looked over. Then woman were increasingly looking for film and model roles and some frowned on exposing their skin. Mae West knew how to address the issue with good wit and humor.